How to determine your values? An exercise which can help you

in life •  7 years ago  (edited)

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A big part of my life I was stumbling through it, not really giving a lot of fucks about anything. I wanted to party, meeting girls and nice things like a big TV, a nice appartment etc and of course enough money to support all this.

But in the back of my head I had a differnt view on myself were I was determined to achieve something in my life, beeing succesful and get some meaning into all this.

At a time I felt very down, vulnerable and confused what I really want a friend showed me the following exercise:

Imagine you are at a funeral, all your family members, friends and peers from working are sitting there. The coffin is open and you approach it.

You see yourself in it.

You are not scared or sad about this but you realize you are at your own funeral.

You sit down and decide to watch it for a while.

A family member stands up, steps to the microphone and begins talking about you, they share memories and talking about the qualities you had.

After this a friend does the same and so does a colleague. Even people you never met but admire can talk at your imaginary funeral.

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What do you want them to say? How you want to be remembered? What do you can do NOW to become this person? What do you have to do consitently? Do you have to acquire new skills? Or change some bad habits?

Write it all down and reflect on it where you are and where you want to be.

This didnt solve everything at once but it got me going to move again into a more positve direction. I am way more inline and especially aware who I want to be. How I want to react in certain situations with family members,friends and even strangers.

I want to leave you with, what I think is a great quote and was very fitting for my situation a couple of years back

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Brilliant post mate!!
I think it's so easy to lost perspective, and go into a sort of sleep where you keep doing the same things every day.

I think taking responsibility for your life is the real "waking up".

Routines are killing dreams imo.

And yes I totally agree with taking full responibility for your own life. The good and the bad. Even if sombody scratches your car while you are shopping it is still your responsibilty how you react. Peopel giving so much power away by blaming x and y and not asking how did I get here and how do I deal with it now?

Thanks a lot for reading and the kind words

You are totally right. Life is a precious thing and one must take full advantage of it. I am fortunate to be able to enjoy it as I wish and I would like to be able to help people. I will follow you because you are a good person. Thank you

I try my best most of the time at least.

wonderful post, inspiring even. Thanks.

thank you very much. I hope some will try it and find some insight

I'd say imagine also what your-living-self would say about you!
Great post @flipstar! Reflective :D

thank you very much.

My living self is still nagging from time to time but way happier and on a good path I think :-)

There you go! Wishing you best of luck :)

Rock bottom is a good place to start and let your comeback be greater than your setback.

propaply it is the best place to reinvinte yourself since you know what brought you here and you are way more open for something new as if everything goes ok.

You are right, we have the freedom to do whatever we want in this life but at the same time we need to be responsible for our own actions. Are we contributing to make this world a better place, helping the others, or being the best version of ourselves?

If we are in a rut and kind of unhappy or ok the odds are we dont.

I think it is our responsibiltiy to feel good within ourselves and then spread this happiness.

Like a burning candel we have and then can pass on and light somone elses candel also. If both candles are dark nobody has any light

This post received a 2.5% upvote from @randowhale thanks to @flipstar! For more information, click here!

This post has received a 7.97 % upvote from @booster thanks to: @flipstar.

Hi there!
Nice post. I just upvoted you
If you like me please make sure to upvote my posts too
Following would be great help
Thanks

wow. excellent post.. thanks