As everybody knows, life can be quite surprising. So surprising as some people’s attitudes are. If you didn’t know, you are living near ghouls! Disguised ghouls, that is. They come dressed as neighbors, friends, relatives (closed or removed ones, depending on the context), colleagues and so on and so forth. They are so well disguised that when you are betrayed, you just feel flabbergasted of how come that particular individual, whom you’ve helped, has done this to you. If you are still wondering why you shouldn’t trust people, keep on reading.
While you are reading, let’s listen some music. I'm sure it will be more relaxing.
A great philosopher, named Friedrich Nietzsche, has an excellent quote:
"I am not mad because you have lied to me. I am mad because from now on I cannot trust you anymore."
So what do you understand from this? Is it ok to fully trust people?
Man’s character
It’s in man’s nature to be sort of slippery - he shuffles as it fits him best. When you have the most trust in him, he simply mesmerizes you by selling you when you least expect it, he rounds on you when this doesn’t even passes through your mind, when you are down, he just forgets about you and many other things which you may didn’t have the bad luck to deal with. This means you should always carefully think things through so that you’ll be prepared for what might happen.
Trustworthiness is relative. Everything is possible, that is. The godfather can get all intimate with the god daughter or the god son with the godmother, best friends fight due to their wives…and the list can go on and on.
Recently, something happened to me at work. When you get promoted, most likely you’ll be envied by others. And what does this envy seeds? It seeds hate and, as one of my friends used to say, “spleens”. Some people would do anything just to make sure that you are down. Usually, men have the tendency to harm you if you represent a threat to them. This threat I’m talking about is not something to directly hit them. Even the simple fact that you are more capable than they are, can make them feel uncomfortable.
There will be moments when you’ll make mistakes or you’ll become broke. The majority of us get to deal with this at some point or another. I really don’t think that there is someone not to have dealt with such situation. In those moments, everybody will just disappear like cockroaches do when you turn on the light. They will most probably say “Leave him! Fuck him! Sure enough that this would happen to him!”
If you are lucky enough, maybe you’ll have friends to support you, but never rely on others’ pity! You should be the only one to figure out how to get out of this deadlock. Without relying on anybody, without trusting nobody. It is most advisable that you do not confess to nobody. Your stuff should only be known by your family. Or in some circumstances, it is most recommended that only you know about them. Life will surely show you this!
Trusting people
It is not ok to trust people! Trusting people can be painful. It is painful because the consequences can be quite surprising. My dad once said: “My boy, don’t trust not even your own self! Because there is a chance that you may say something now and after just half an hour you’ll say something else.” And he never said this with any hate or incrimination, like I was some kind of a nutty. He was only telling me this like “everybody is the same”, each cares for its own business. If at some point you figure out that your good is somewhere else, you change your mind. And this is nothing to blame yourself with. It is not wrong to wish for your own sake’s wellness. It is wrong indeed to do harm while searching for your good!
I have some “friends” who talk with me and afterwards, when they stop talking with me, they start talking about me and about all they previously talked about with me. I also have other such “friends” who only take advantage of others’ kindness just to get a cigar. I am surrounded by people who can’t wait for me to mess it up just to charge me or to at least tell me off to someone who could throw the book on me. I have by my side so many benevolent individuals who only feed themselves with gossip…I also have many acquaintances who are constantly working against me. And you know what’s even worse? Some of them are really close to me. They are even blood relatives. But I believe I’m not the only one going through this. Anyway, the good part is that life teaches you how to track such people down- how to reveal their true color.
I have met in my life such special specimens. They coined things and said things just to denigrate you- so that people think you are a giant fool and everything you do is just a total mess. Oh my God, what people, what scams, what hangdogs! And to make matters worse, in your face they were all like best friends, the most understandable partners ever. Of course, they would never admit to have said such things about you! But this is the humankind! Notorious bitches!
It is best advisable to not get surprised by anything. It is better to expect everything. Some, for instance, have went through strong shocks when getting some news. That is why it is better to not waste so much energy and to take life exactly how it is. With the bad and as well with the good.
You can have friends! I’m not saying you can’t! But it is best to keep for yourself the most intimate secrets. Or at least for you and your family. And that’s it! In other circumstances you might get manipulated…
Life can be beautiful without having to trust people. The less you give a fuck, by being ready for everything, the simpler, more beautiful and healthier your life will be.
“Be courteous to all, but intimate with few, and let those few be well tried before you give them your confidence.” - George Washington
Let people earn your trust.
Don't give it away cheaply.
Downvoting a post can decrease pending rewards and make it less visible. Common reasons:
Submit
For me i try to give everybody "a full glass of trust" when first in contact. Most people tend to spill a lot of the trust tho...
Downvoting a post can decrease pending rewards and make it less visible. Common reasons:
Submit
I do the same...
Downvoting a post can decrease pending rewards and make it less visible. Common reasons:
Submit
Congratulations @florinmanica!
Your post was mentioned in my hit parade in the following category:
Downvoting a post can decrease pending rewards and make it less visible. Common reasons:
Submit
You are a good man. Thank you very much for your support.
Downvoting a post can decrease pending rewards and make it less visible. Common reasons:
Submit
Excellent topic. Keep it up
Downvoting a post can decrease pending rewards and make it less visible. Common reasons:
Submit
You are nice. Thank you.
Downvoting a post can decrease pending rewards and make it less visible. Common reasons:
Submit
As a psychotherapist and executive coach for some 30 years now I have run into a number of people who have helped to shape my character because I was willing to trust them yes taking risks can be dangerous but isn't that what life is all about living to the fullest learning from others and finding your own way. Trust a way, powerfully, courageously and lovingly would be my advice. You have nothing to lose, really. And what you have to gain for taking that risk is you might just discover who you really are .
Downvoting a post can decrease pending rewards and make it less visible. Common reasons:
Submit
I agree!
Downvoting a post can decrease pending rewards and make it less visible. Common reasons:
Submit
What I found out through my own experience is that surrounding yourself with like-minded people is essential for one's well-being. But, I also discovered that there is a danger to it as well. I think seeing the both sides of the coin enriches your experience and helps you through you own journey of self-discovery. However, As Nietzsche wrote in "Thus-Spoke-Zarathustra" returning into [your] "cave" and withdraw from men is where we can learn more about who we are and thus be prepared to face the world.
Downvoting a post can decrease pending rewards and make it less visible. Common reasons:
Submit
I totally agree. You have a very good way of saying things. And I like it.
Thank you so much for your nice sentences.
Downvoting a post can decrease pending rewards and make it less visible. Common reasons:
Submit
Very true.
Downvoting a post can decrease pending rewards and make it less visible. Common reasons:
Submit
Hustle in life man ....Best Of Luck With Greater Future Ahead With Joy And Happiness ...Peace ✌🏻
Downvoting a post can decrease pending rewards and make it less visible. Common reasons:
Submit
Man is a social creature, thus his (and her) inherent nature is to fight for position, to keep a wary eye on how others are doing to and resent it when they are doing better and to seek to surpass them. This is not our best self, or the self that creates the best community, but it is the reality of the body we all find ourselves in this time around.
Trying to repress this just pushes the urges into our subconscious, and we end up turning our logic into pretzels in order to justify what our subconscious is screaming at us to do. Much better to acknowledge the urges and then remove ourselves from someone's company if we find that they stimulate too much competition from ourselves.
Similarly, a willingness to withdraw from friends who demonstrate that they have not figured out how to control these urges is healthy. It's how balance is achieved. Peaceful and voluntary withdrawal is the feedback loop that keeps society peaceful and healthy. It acts as a one way valve, that terminates unhealthy relationships while maintaining healthy ones, and the termination process of a relationship is part of the learning process for others.
Relationships are like a healthy marketplace. Monopoly is bad. Competition is good. Having your friends know that you won't stick around if they treat you poorly is part of what keeps them honest and trustworthy.
Downvoting a post can decrease pending rewards and make it less visible. Common reasons:
Submit
There is nothing to add. You pointed everything! Thank you so much for being so relevant. Your comment has so much value you can't imagine!
Downvoting a post can decrease pending rewards and make it less visible. Common reasons:
Submit
Thanks -- your post was a great one to respond to and I enjoyed reading it!
Downvoting a post can decrease pending rewards and make it less visible. Common reasons:
Submit
Due to the comment and your contribution, I will follow you.
Downvoting a post can decrease pending rewards and make it less visible. Common reasons:
Submit
i learned a hybrid method! I trust everyone and also expect they will let me down! i get the best of both worlds ;-) lol its true actually!
Downvoting a post can decrease pending rewards and make it less visible. Common reasons:
Submit
Very good strategy. But this cannot be applied all the time :)
Downvoting a post can decrease pending rewards and make it less visible. Common reasons:
Submit
I recommend reading RAW Food and the Psych Ward and Ready Set Go! Step out. I think it will speak to you
Downvoting a post can decrease pending rewards and make it less visible. Common reasons:
Submit
You made me curious! Ok, I will check.
Downvoting a post can decrease pending rewards and make it less visible. Common reasons:
Submit
The path to hell is paved with people who you thought would NEVER fuck you over!! 8-)
Actually it's fine to trust people. Just give it as a gift to people who have earned it instead of letting it be your default mode.
Downvoting a post can decrease pending rewards and make it less visible. Common reasons:
Submit
In 2 years, we all from here will be rich! In that moment life will be very funny (from the point of view of friendship): in that time, you will receive calls from "friends" that suddenly remember you. They will say:
But at the end, they remember that they need some money… Do you know these kinds of friends?
But as you say: "Actually it's fine to trust people." Maybe too funny, in certain circumstances... I say.
Downvoting a post can decrease pending rewards and make it less visible. Common reasons:
Submit
Great, honest article @florinmanica! I can tell you have been let down by many people in your past. But I don't think we have to automatically expect the worst from everyone we meet in our lives.
Such an attitude builds up a barrier that the other person is unable to cross. If you give trust on the other hand the person has the chance to return the favour.
I'm not saying you should trust everyone but usually we can make a healthy judgement about who is going to hurt us and who won't.
I have actually just recently written an article about this topic is as well. It deals with forming relationships. https://steemit.com/psychology/@restlesswanderer/life-lessons-chapter-4-lonely-wolves
Downvoting a post can decrease pending rewards and make it less visible. Common reasons:
Submit
You have right. We don't have to automatically expect the worst from everyone.
Downvoting a post can decrease pending rewards and make it less visible. Common reasons:
Submit
You have some good points in this article, but I do not agree 100% with you. Actually I think it's ok to trust people on same level as you, because you can learn new things together.
Trusting someone and not giving a fuck are 2 different things.
Following you and looking forward to another post from you !
Downvoting a post can decrease pending rewards and make it less visible. Common reasons:
Submit
You know, there are days - in our life - when people are bad. This article came out from my head when I was disappointed. I just wrote - one night - everything that came out from my head. So, was my point of view in that moment.
You don't have to agree. Was just an opinion...
By the way, if you intend to look after my next posts that mean that you don’t hate me for my point of view. 😊
Thank’s for your comment @gamestack, I bet you are a nice man.
Downvoting a post can decrease pending rewards and make it less visible. Common reasons:
Submit