A piece of me

in life •  7 years ago  (edited)


Her name was Miss Gordon


If I close my eyes now, I can still feel her hand stroking my hair. She was my favourite person in that nursing home in Essex, just outside London. How long has it been when I left my job there and moved to London? That was in 2001, and it took me a couple of years after to go back for a short visit.

At that time in her early 90's, she then had dementia, which she didn't have when I was still there. Her room full of books, she had one of the best views, overlooking the home's pond at the back garden. Her demeanour was very strict then, and the staff were hesitant to go inside  her room, let alone stay for a "quick chat". If they can help it, they wouldn't.  Her demeanour was just that. Take it or leave it. BUT SHE WAS LOVELY TO ME.

Though I might have forgotten a lot of our conversations, I remember going in and out of her room as my job allow on a day shift, she usually went to  bed early. I know for a fact that she longed for company. She have had a brother and a cousin who were coming to see her, but oh so infrequently! In a couple of years that I was there, she probably was taken out by her brother, like once a month? This even sounds more than it was. Perhaps. 

Struggling for more words to describe her, I can see her clearly in my mind, the way she was. Staff had to follow her routine to a T, most especially her clothes for the day. Her medicines taken, one at a time, even those so tiny ones. But she was lonely. Her love story was heart-breaking to say the least. The love of her life didn't come back to UK after the war, that's almost a lifetime of having a broken heart, with only her books and a radio on day in, day out.

Our last embrace

As I rushed to see her that day, she called my name. I've only learned of her dementia when we were leaving, accordingly, she didn't know the staff. Nor remember them. She have had dementia for a couple of years. It amazed them to see how she could remember me.

I have forgotten if we even said a word to each other, but I do remember kneeling at her feet and hugging her lap. No words, just grateful and glad to have seen each other and be together at that moment. I don't recall on how long we were in that position...her stroking my hair. She looked so sad and I could understand why. In that moment, we just knew it would be the last time we'll see each other. Deep inside we knew. Her heart wasn't well, she could leave anytime.

This realisation replaced whatever tiny gladness I have had on seeing her, it was replaced by pain and sadness and resignation. And both of us knew. There was no other choice but to accept the fact that she wouldn't last long. The difference was that, our age gap didn't matter. For when two souls speak to each other, there's no need for words. She passed away I think in less than a year.

She left with a piece of me.


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What a beautiful story....so touching.
Ramdam ko po bawat letra na sinulat nyo.
:):) hugssss

Oh that's nice to hear!!! Thank you ate.

Nursing is a calling, not a career...and you were surely called. Nicely written @immarojas... had me blinking .

Oh wow, that's the nicest thing that's ever said to me.. thank you.

I have no words just ❤❤❤

Moments such as that, our memories of them last a lifetime. Our emotions included. Hugs @bearone.

This is heart breaking =(

I am sorry for your loss @immarojas. I cannot say that I know where you are coming from because we deal with loss differently. I could not understand how one person could be expected to cope. I hope you find your peace someday =) Stay strong.

Love,
Gilaine

Hi Gilaine..thanks.She was one of my patients before.

Patients needs compassion and nurses learns to give it to their patients as they practice their profession.

True..we can learn to be more compassionate, it's a struggle for some of us.

awwww! She remembered you coz you were extra nice to her. I salute nurses like you. Your job is for people with genuine hearts. Your story made me teary-eyed. I'm sure Miss Gordon is in a better place now. :-)

Gosh..why are people so nice to me today? Thanks a lot @pinoynomad. All the best to you. See u around!!

Because you are nice and your story moved us. See you around too! :-)

Pssst, not too much, masungit ako lolssss. Have you heard of our group @steemph Family???

No, not yet. I will check it out. :-)

  ·  7 years ago (edited)

stared at the reply box for a few minutes and thought of what to say but nothing comes to my my mind than a depressing story that i can relate with ....very well written though! Your love and compassion for what you do is undeniable , so proud of you :)

Hi insan..finally! Yeah, kind of depressing and amazing at the same time, but even to this day, the wonder of it amazes me.
Welcome aboard!
You know these people? @mariayves0912 @bowiemagbag @idamagbag @raynarojas

You are welcome to my new steemian family @steemph. #SteemitPhilippines

kitam?
iba talaga pag orig ..ipagpa2loy mo pa yan gurlash ;)

Ahahaha..naisep kita lolsss! Thanks girlfrend..hanggang sa muling pag-uusap ahehe

Akala ko hanggang sa muling pagkikita hahaha! Parang iba at lipad isip ko eh.... Hehehe

Para sa mga buhay po ate lolsss
Though our grief remains for a long time, those moments we have of them remain and much stronger than sorrow.

Hahaha, mabuhay..... Ang mga patay sa November hahaha. Kahit may happen kailangan pa ring tumawa pra maibsan ang hinagpis at pangungulila. At least they are now in no pain but in peace. God bless you Jan at ingat, btw NASA ibang bansa ka pa din ba?

UU po. Uve heard na un proper tagging sa curation?
#philippines if english
#pilipinas if tagalog or in a dialect

kulit mo :P
nagkataon lang late ang mga sundo ko :P

Ilang sundo ba need mo? Di ka naman siguro bubuhatin ng 5 tao noh??

tse kulit

Totots!

The truth of this story shines through. Souls always recognize each other. Beautiful!!!

hey @onetree!!! Coming from you is awesome, how have you been?
Hey listen, I have been introducing our new group @steemph Family. We will be marketing the platform thru charity initiatives in the Philippines. Please check us out when you have the time.

That means a lot to me. You really captured your experience and gave us a glimpse of your friend. I am touched by the truth of the doul experience. This is why we are here, is it not? I will definitely check out your initiative when I am back at my computer.

Yeah, even now I still wonder how amazing that moment was with her.
Sad and amazed at the same time when i think of her.
Her loss was very profound.

💚

Be well @onetree, nice to have heard from you.

Very beautifull story...love to read it..thank for share your

You're welcome, am glad you find it beautiful. Others find it depressing. There is a beauty and wonder to it all for me.

Waiting for other post...

Ahaha pls wait a while..pressure hey?

Oh my I can't help but feeling sad and lonely teary ryed while reading how u have been remembered. I was still in grief missing my papa who passed in a quite calmly way this month. He too become forgotten sometimes I don't even know if he still know us that time. But he do still smile if us sisters talk funny things and he smile while lying in bed got we have so loud voices laughing. I can still picture it out on my mind, how I missed my papa, tears falls down but I don't want them to see for I want them to see me strong while missing him inside my heart to keep my mama not to cry too. You may felt lonely for she was gone but felt at ease the same time for she can now rest in peace. Have a good day. Tnx for sharing :)

Thank you and you're welcome.

A painful reality but you can't stop it
So we just have to accept it
And embrace reality.
Wow! I love the story pero masakit sa puso .

Masaket yeah.

Thank you for sharing this with me @immarojas! I have a dozen seniors that I have personally treated for the last decade. They are all in the 80s now and I am going to be absolutely wrecked when anyone of them take their last breath.
Good for you, for saving her spirit and the nature of your special relationship on the blockchain. It's invaluable.

I treasure a few, and you're in it. Just so u know @rebeccaryan. Hugs.

You are a rare Gem yourself @immarojas! I consider you a treasure too and I am lucky to know you and call you my friend. Hugs back to you.

Don't disappear @rebeccaryan ;)

What a beautiful and touching story. I am so happy that you were there for her, you angel you! She sounds like an amazing character to have known too.

Oh Sallybeth..we have had loads of them with characters. A miss london was there too. And each day was fun for me..except some heart-breaking situations.

Touching story! People like you who contribute society on such an amazing way should be appreciated more.. but right ones will recognize that, like Miss Gordon.

Thank you Alex..a little appreciation goes a long way yet sadly there's not much of that sometimes. We should stop expecting but we can't help it..am glad that you do.

This is a moving story. Thank you for sharing it.

Thank you Tom. Cheers.

I'm so sorry for your loss.

😄😇😄

@creatr

Thank you..that was 15 yrs ago..a patient of mine.

I don't know what to say... I'm sorry for your loss. @immarojas Life goes like that, but it's always hard to accept it.

Life is wonderful when friends abound.

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i'm touched by this one..😢

Ganda ba?
Magsulat ka nga ng ilocano..use pilipinas as a tag. i-curate mi.
Follow @ettenin ...andito na sya.wa pa post.

thanks for tlc daw =D

Yeah.. true that!

very well written, I could see it happen

Thanks!

So nice to know she remembered you. Nice story.

Ive only learnt she had dementia when we were leaving..that was surreal right?? the wonder of it.

What a heartbreaking story!

Thank you.

I can relate but i will stay speechless for now. Stay strong!

Hey Terry, thanks! This was like 15 years ago, she's one of my patients then.

Nice that you still shared it now. It still served the purpose of teaching!

The memory is fresh..all of it. It never entered my mind that it can be used as a "teaching" stuff. Thanks Terry.

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