29 Things

I am turning thirty this year and several people have asked me (I have asked myself this several times) what I have done these past thirty years or what I am going to do the next thirty, I very quickly realized that I haven't fully figured anything out yet. However cliche or hollow publishing 'lists' or 'life advice' sounds, I have decided to put together some 29 things I have learned along the way and things I think you should do. Here goes.

We probably aren't going to live very long and even if we did we are going to be forgotten eventually. Our time on earth is limited, make it count. You certainly don't want to wake up every morning and wonder what you are doing with your life. Don't do stuff you don't like, don't get caught up with everyday trivialities and nothingness. Find your purpose, find something you love doing and let it consume you and give you a soul.

Read Charles Bukowski's quotes, it actually makes a lot of sense.

Don't waste your time with people who don't value your relationship or respect you. I really mean this, it's just not worth it. Develop personal relationships with people who will help, develop and grow you. Spend time with people who make you happy and fulfilled. Have a handful of true friends who you can call and talk to any time of the day. Call them, don't whatsapp or text them, bounce ideas off them, argue with them, listen to them. Cut off the rest like cancer.

Meditate.

Be financially independent. Money won't buy you happiness or true friends, but it will definitely make a lot of mundane stuff easier. It will give you the freedom and runway to pursue what you want. It will take away a lot of stress associated with figuring out how to pay your rent and bills on time. Lack of money always creates stress, remember this. Have a clear financial plan and goal, diversity your assets, offset your risks and build a nest egg. Remember to spend on experiences, learning and people. It will broaden your mind and it will pay off. Don't forget to live your life, don't just merely exist.

Love someone more than you love yourself.

Exercise every few days, watch what you eat and sleep well. Have that occasional fillet mignon. Try different cuisines from the world, tasting menus etc., it enhances your life. I haven't left New York City in the past five years and it's definitely beginning to take a toll on me. Get out more often and explore nature, it will make a difference. Take a break from everything and go out for a walk alone.

Watch less TV, watch documentaries and TED instead. Follow Marina Abramovic and The Wachowski Brothers(or sisters).

I have always told everyone around me, "When in doubt, don't do it". I couldn't have been more wrong. When in doubt, just do it. Take chances, take risks, 'do what thou wilt' (as far as it doesn't harm anyone else adversely) - let that be the law of the land. Don't always listen to the noise and people around you, it's corrupted, infected and everything else, listen to your gut instead. Don't regret not doing something, go kiss that person you love/like.

Stay focused. Don't let your mind wander too much.

Read books. Read 'The Metamorphosis' by Franz Kafka, 'The Catcher in the Rye' by J.D Salinger. Read autobiographies, science fiction, non-fiction, business books, erotic novels, comics - read all of it. You will transported to a different world and live a thousand lives, discover the joy of imagination. Don't just read, write more. Have a blog or a journal.

Listen to 'BitterSweet Symphony' by The Verve. Attend live concerts. Once you have done enough of that listen to Bob Dylan's 'Subterranean Homesick Blues'. Pay attention to what he has to say.

Do things you haven't done before. Try new things. Go to a museum and stare at Van Gogh's work, it does something to you. Explore your sexuality, have sex, have a mistress, be a submissive, cross dress, go to a gay bar and make out with that guy/girl, visit a strip club. Be safe, shatter the rules, don't break the law. It keeps life interesting.

Ask 'why not? ' more frequently.

Don't be a politician at work, just do good work, the accolades and the recognition will follow. Go out of your way to help people who need it. Don't screw people over to advance professionally, forgive people, don't hold grudges or burn bridges. Know when to keep quiet and when to speak up.

Be alone. Smoke sheesha alone, go to a michelin star restaurant alone, walk alone, travel alone. Do some things alone.

Start your own company and build something that will last. There's nothing more rewarding than that. Sex, maybe.

Read this Theodore Roosevelt quote .

“It is not the critic who counts; not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles, or where the doer of deeds could have done them better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena, whose face is marred by dust and sweat and blood; who strives valiantly; who errs, who comes short again and again, because there is no effort without error and shortcoming; but who does actually strive to do the deeds; who knows great enthusiasms, the great devotions; who spends himself in a worthy cause; who at the best knows in the end the triumph of high achievement, and who at the worst, if he fails, at least fails while daring greatly, so that his place shall never be with those cold and timid souls who neither know victory nor defeat.”

Read it again.

Human beings are extraordinary. We all are. Remarkable things start happening if you put yourself in the shoes of the people who hate you and yes, there will be people who hate you. Listen to them and then ignore them.

Have crazy parties and stay up late every once in awhile. It's ok to get really drunk and blackout . Do it with your friends, never do it alone. Don't do it every week, that will just ruin your life in more ways than one. Trust me, I have been there. Don't always do things in moderation, you will bore yourself to death. Realize that we are all dead people anyways.

Don't donate to charity for the sake of it. If you want to make a difference, take the time to learn about policies, frameworks and pursue the change you wish to see with a vengeance. Don't do things half-heartedly because you don't have the 'time' for it. Time doesn't exist, it's a mental construct.

Respect women, they are way more powerful than you can comprehend.

Learn about the different religions the world has to offer, be spiritual not a religious zealot. Read Thomas L.Friedman's 'The Lexus and the Olive Tree' and 'The God Delusion' by Richard Dawkins to get a better context on globalization, religion and civilizations.

Go hug a stranger. Don't be creepy about it.

Stop worrying, nothing good comes out of it. Everything passes - birth, happiness, joy, regret, sorrow, jealousy, lust, fun, ambition, death. Everything passes.

Learn to code, technology is probably the greatest equalizer we have ever known. It's fertile and productive.

The world is bizarre and will keep getting weirder. Do things fast and do them dangerously before your time is up. It's better to get a speeding ticket than a parking ticket. Keep moving. Don't just stand still.

Forgive, don't forget.

Get excited, be a kid again and believe in yourself.

That's all I have.