Missing, Endangered, and Mixed Emotions

in life •  5 years ago 

Wow, its been so long since my last post. Life got busy and my needs of venting my emotions became last on my list of things to do. I couldn't hold back anymore. So much has happened since my last post I dont even know where to begin or how to place my words to make sense. I will try my best.

Lets start with the biggest thing on my mind...

2 years ago ( give or take some time) my boss moved on to a different company.. and left me with a new boss. We had a rough start at the beginning due to him not knowing what I did there and how hard I strived to complete any and all tasks at hand. He said show me and I'll make you my shift lead. So I did just that and pretty soon he had me promoting fast through the company till I had stepped up to be his right hand (wo)man. He would always tell me one day you will have my job. He was always the first to encourage me when I didn't feel like I was enough. The first one to say I'm proud of you and he always knew when I was upset or stressed about something. He wasn't just my boss he was a friend.. or so I thought...

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Fast forward a little bit, and all of his lies began coming out every single one. (I wont go into detail due to privacy of employees) but devastating truths came out and he never showed again.. our last phone call I was crying.. I gave him a chance to tell me the truth and he continued lieing to me.. even with all the proof right in front of me.. the next day hr and several top leaders were called. The next morning i struggled to get out of bed knowing the mess waiting for me to clean up all while I was broken. It was as if my boss and friend that I thought I knew was dead. He was a figment of my imagination..
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To this day I feel like I lost someone. While I was cleaning up his mess and being there for the people he hurt, Working so many hours to get the team back to as normal as possible. I was mourning. To this day Its hard to accept that my role model and mentors whole persona was fake..

One week ago.. I was alerted to news that this man was missing and considered endangered.. still no word on where he is or if he is okay. As crappy of a human being he was for his lies and betrayals I still can't help but think maybe the guy that I knew wasn't all a lie, and even if he was, while everyone is bashing and laughing at the fact that hes missing.. I find myself concerned hoping he is okay.. and nobody to express my nonsense feelings too..

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