How to Keep Jealousy Away From Your Life

Jealousy is a kind of emotion that we all experience from time to time in our life while managing certain relations whether it is friendship, marriage, family or work. I usually say that jealousy has a second name too and that is “relationship killer”. No relation can last long if jealously is enrooted in it. It is one of those things that cause major rifts in relations and hearts. It causes great threats to the future of a certain relationship.

Jealousy comes with many different disguises and can also take many different forms. It is such a disastrous feeling that can dismantle a beautiful relationship even before it actually begins. Yes, I know, when you pour your heart out to someone, when you offer a piece of yourself to another, when you open up your whole world to some special individual, you put so much of yourself at stake. There comes a sense of vulnerability when you share your deepest secret to someone that you have never ever shared with anyone else before. You become so close to some people that you don’t want to lose them at any possible cost. In such relations, insecurity and instability are the common feelings that trigger jealousy at times. Look, it is natural to be jealous to some extent but the most important thing is not to get insecure to the level that becomes threatening for the relationships.

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• What Causes Jealousy?
  There are so many different ways that jealousy can be present in certain relationships. If you don’t want your relationships to suffer from this unwanted feeling, you need to carefully analyze and understand its origins as well as the underlying causes. You need to evaluate that what particular thing or experience is causing jealousy inside you.

Let’s discuss some common experiences or behaviors that become the cause of jealousy.

• Your Past Haunts You
  One of the most common causes of jealousy is past experiences. If you have a rough past, have been cheated on in your prior relationship, have dealt with someone walking away or have experienced certain trauma, you are likely to be insecure about your present relationships too. You are afraid of going through that pain again. When this happens, you become exposed to jealousy and start doubting yourself or your relations because of it.

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• You Try to Control Things
  Jealousy stems out when you feel like you “own” someone. Remember no one in this world owns anyone. We all are free. So, when you try to control your relationships, become bossy, or develop demanding kind of mindset you also become jealous. The point is jealousy can never be attractive. You may care for someone so much that you don’t want them to go away but jealously would ruin everything in the end. People will more likely to stay connected to you only if you provide them enough space to be who they are and deal with them in a nice way.

• You Want Perfection
  We all know that nothing in this world is perfect. If you long for everything to be perfect, you will end up being alone. One of the obvious cause of jealousy is to demand perfection in every little action. When you start fantasizing about perfection, this is when your relations start suffering. Every relationship is different. If your friend has an ideal kind of relationship with your dad, it is not necessary that you should also have that particular kind of bond. It is quite natural to have jealousy is in small doses but when it starts crossing a certain threshold, things start getting worse for you and for your loved ones too.

• You Hide Something
  Jealousy often occurs when you have something to hide. The feeling of guilt proves to be a major source of jealousy. When you hide something while connecting with some new person, you always have guilt in your heart that later changes into jealousy and ruin the relationship. You start doubting things and the chain continues until people stop paying attention to what you really want from them.

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• How to Overcome Jealousy

• Understand the feelings of jealousy
  Jealousy is a complex emotion that includes fear, anger, sorrow, humiliation, and betrayal. Learn to question the feeling of jealousy whenever it occurs.

• Get the root of jealousy
  Analyze and conclude that why you are jealous of some particular thing. Look all the emotions inside you and think about their cause.

• Believe the people you love
  Choose to trust the people you love. Never let distrust overpower your relationship. Do not blame people unnecessarily.

• Accept your mistakes
  Whenever you know that you have made some mistake, just apologize for your behavior and explain why you said that particular thing. Try to keep things simple for your loved ones.