You've been dating for a while, And just waiting for him to pop the question.
I feel like this is increasingly common these days.

You've been dating a year...
You've been dating two years...
You've been dating three years...
Five years...
Six Years...
Heck, maybe even 10 Years.

Every year on your birthday, You realize you're just getting older. Maybe you see a bit of aging in the mirror.

You try to reassure yourself, That marriage is just a "piece of paper."

You try to tell yourself that it's just "not important."

You're trying to convince yourself, that you don't "need" this.

As you see another person on Facebook flaunting their engagement, After just six months of dating....

But deep down you are going crazy Because here you are just waiting. Wondering, Not ever knowing if this will ever happen...
But you know it's something you want. No matter how much you deny it. You want it.

You've Had The Talk. A Million times...

This post is embarrassing for me.
I dated a guy six years....
I was in love with him; I thought I'd spend the rest of my life with him.
Sure things weren't perfect, But I was always trying to improve myself, Improve the relationship. And just overall grow myself.
We went through so much together, And still managed to stay by each other's side. So many good and bad experiences.
I thought for sure we'd be ready...

He seemed to match every definition of being my "soulmate" That ever existed.
I never felt this way about another human being in my life.
I didn't know it was even possible to love a person so much.

We talked... Again and again.

He convinced me that he was simply "clueless" about the whole thing. And that he would save for an engagement ring...

Another year goes by.. And nothing.
Deep down, I knew something was wrong. He has the money; He had the money the whole time...
I didn't even expect anything fancy or elaborate. Just something simple.

Here I am looking like a desperate idiot .
Finally, I brought it up again, Offering to pay for the ring. He'd just have to propose.

Easy right?

I get it; we want to assume the absolute best from our partners right?
But the thing is, This "talk" can only happen so many times.
Don't make my mistake.
If a man wants to be with you, He will make it happen. He will make it work. No silly excuses will be used. Luckily, Many guys out there will be honest and flat out say " I don't want to get married ever. " And if a guy says that BELIEVE HIM! In my case, That was never said. Until the very end...

ACTIONS SPEAK LOUDER THAN WORDS!

Two Years down...
Still nothing.
I was trying everything I could, to be the best that I could be, The best girlfriend. The best everything. But every day my heart was breaking so deep. I can't even describe the emotional turmoil I had to deal with. I feel like women don't understand it fully until they are in this situation.

Here I was this woman, Who never really cared about weddings or marriage. Turning into this obsessed, Disgusting little creep. Thinking nonstop about the married life.

I couldn't wait to be his wife; I couldn't wait to make him dinner And be excited to come home from work to see him.
I couldn't wait for our long-term plans! And being able to see him every day. And have a life together.

But every day, Every month, There was no movement forward.

I Thought we had an understanding here?!
He kept promising me; He was working on it. I just needed to give him "time." So I did. I trusted him. I believed that he would pull through, And I became excited. Knowing that soon... Soon I would be engaged to my best friend.

I guess five years at that point, Still wasn't enough.

There are a million articles online that say...

Do X+Y+Z, And you'll get the proposal.
But they don't work...

TRUST ME! I followed every single one of those!

If a guy isn't moving in that direction ON HIS OWN.
Run like hell!!!

You Can Force Your Guy To Propose, Trust Me! I DID!

After playing this funny little game for two years.
I finally got what I wanted...
On January 13, 2017.
He got down on one knee. And asked me to marry him.

For a moment I was the happiest woman alive.
Until we were walking back to our hotel, And I began to realize...
That he put almost no effort into the proposal. That something didn't feel right. The whole thing felt so forced...
My heart was more broken than it ever had been.

He had two years to prepare for this, And there was no preparation done at all.

Months later he finally He told me. He never wanted to.

He never wanted to get married, Or engaged to me, That he never even thought about it.
He only did it, Because he knew I wanted it. And He knew I'd leave if he didn't. I've never felt more "scammed" in my life. With someone, I invested so much into. Not only that but the WHOLE TIME! His friends, Family, And everyone else. Was also occasionally pressuring him, But He never told me that. Until now. I had no idea that the people he was closest to, Was so onboard with us being together forever. And what a compliment that was...

And the whole thing ended our relationship.

The thing is, The signs were there. THE WHOLE TIME!
But I chose to ignore them.
Most of the time in life, THE SIGNS ARE THERE! Sometimes we choose not to see them.

I instead believed his excuses and lies. I chose to look at the relationship with rose-colored glasses.
But I should have taken them off and WOKE UP!
I cant entirely blame him, But instead, I have to take responsibility for not leaving sooner.
I now have to start from scratch, A new relationship, New feelings, and I have to learn to somehow love deeply like that again.
So one day Maybe, I'll get married...

It Still Hurts

Deep down, I sometimes hope that this will somehow correct itself. That somehow, This was all a mistake, and things will change.
That his love for me will be deep enough, That he'll run in on a horse to take me away.
But it's not happening, Today, tomorrow. Or even in this lifetime.
And why should I care?
Is this someone that I should spend my life with?
Someone that can deceive me and play with my emotions for years? Someone who is so okay with "letting me go"? And throwing in the towel when he can no longer lie his way through?

It's Not Supposed To Be THIS HARD!

You have a right to know where the relationship is going.
It's a two people relationship, not a one person relationship.
If he's not clear on his intentions, And he's not taking any action.
DO SOMETHING ABOUT IT.
Heck, You propose, Get it over with. So you can have your answer.
Or if that's not your cup of tea (It's not mine either).
Then prepare to leave.

Men want freedom; it's their instinct. But at the end of the day, If he wants you bad enough, He'll make it happen.
And if he doesn't. Then you can find someone who has the same intentions as you.
Life is short; life is fragile. Don't let someone waste your time.

ACTIONS SPEAK LOUDER THAN WORDS!