My decision to leave my parents when I turned 18

in life •  8 years ago 

Well I guess to start out my name is Hayley and this is a very personal part about my life that I would like to tell you about because it made me into a completely different person then I am today. So lets start off with this; I met this boy back in 2010 just before my seventeenth birthday.
It was late August when my best friend and I were spending the night together (her and I were stuck at the hip). We decided that we would go for a walk and talk about the things we could never tell our parents, boys we liked, things we've done and things we wanted to do by our self or with people. We went to our usual spot in the church parking lot where we would sit on the far side under the trees. It was a really beautiful day to be out the breeze was just crisp enough to cool off the late August heat in our home state. She had this really uncanny way of saying hello to everyone that walked by and because of her bubbly personality it always made people stop and say hello.
Well this is about the time this boy and his brother were riding by on bikes when she had to scream hi at them. Out of all the things they could have done differently they decided to turn back around and come over to talk to us. I'm the shy and quiet type so all I did was sit next to her and let her talk. We found out he was new to the area just moved from across the county apparently, well one thing led to another and we gave him our phone numbers before we left to go back to my house. That night my best friend got a random text and it turned out to be him.
Shortly after we got antiquated he enrolled in our high school, we eventually became really good friends.
September 21st that year is when he asked me out and of course I said yes. We went through hell being together after about six months of being together he left to go live with his parents in Wyoming for a job that was promised to him. He told me he was doing it so that we could have a future after i got out of high school. We kept in contact always on the phone or texting each other. I fell in love with him and I couldn't be happier with it; he came back after seven months of being gone to start a business with his uncle, he even proposed to me in the very spot we met and as young and dumb as I was I said yes. It was going pretty well till he got contact from his biological father again and at this point of being back in Utah with me for only a little while he decided at the end of 2011 he would move to Wisconsin to be with his father.
This broke my heart I had just got him back and now hes leaving again. i watched him leave with my eyes bloodshot from crying so much. It was nearing my graduation date, I had completed all my needed credits for graduating so i just kinda floated through school. He wanted to ask my dad for my hand and we set up a time for that, well the conversation went the complete opposite direction. My then fiance(my parents didn't know) called my dad some names and thats when it all kind of started to fall apart. My parents hated him they didn't want me to associate myself with him anymore and I chose him over my family.
I ended up graduating early, leaving home just like that poof i was gone and on my way to his parents house in Wyoming where i stayed for two weeks before his crazy mother kicked me out for calling her husband a liar. Him and his step father got into a fight and he ended up telling me that he hopes that we never have kids together, i decided to tell his son and when it came back he twisted his words around and that is when i got kicked out in a Podunk town in the middle of nowhere. i didn't know anyone or where to go i was stranded. but some nice people helped me out and i ended back in Utah with my parents for a bit. i found out that his step mom bought me a bus ticket out that way and i was leaving in a week.
I eventually made my way to Wisconsin by April of 2012. It was the first time away from my family and i didn't know what to do. i got lost with myself and it took me three months to realize how dumb i was for doing this. he had promised to send me back for my walk down the aisle for graduation to receive my diploma but that never happened. i ended up working as i watched the clock tick by at work i cried the entire night there. i messed up and i couldn't turn things back. i couldn't go back in time to tell myself to stop and think i just did whatever and i faced the consequences for it. I hated myself for everything i put my family through and myself. he was mentally abusive he would bring me up one day and break me the next, he stole money from me to go buy drugs and i didn't know it till i checked my bank account one day. what was suppose to be 800 was now 80. He was able to guess my pin to my card and while i was sleeping he would go and take money out. i know it sounds kinda stupid but i didn't think i had to worry about him stealing.
In June of 2012 we broke up and that was the last i had ever seen of him.
the moral that i like to spread is think before you leap just because you're in love doesn't mean that what you are doing isn't going to turn sour. make sure you completely and whole heatedly know this person and make sure your stable. don't just jump when you don't know what you'll hit on your way down and for the young girls that get a chance to read don't let a boy decide your life for you, don't ever let him take control be the independent and strong person that your parents raised you to be because then you'll see through all the fog of his deception.
Thank you to all of those who read this, its much appreciated

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Damn and here i am for something happy to read though i'm glad i ran across your post honestly it sounds like a teen drama movie but then again the same applies to most people i know . i hope you have found peace and made a better life for yourself i wish you the best of luck.

  ·  8 years ago (edited)

Life is harsh when you're starting out as an adult.

Hope you have good bf now that doesnt leave all the time

Those are very tough lessons but it sounds like you've made it through.

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