Snow Way!!

I looked out the window at the swirling snow. It was pelting down thick and fast. I sighed, normally I love snow but not when I am stuck in work staring at it through a window.

Someone flounced up to my desk. I tore my gaze from the blizzard outside to face my visitor.

It was El Jefe.

Look at that snow Boomdawg! Look at it!

I have been. It's pretty heavy.

El Jefe stepped right up to the window till his breath was fogging the glass. Then he turned and smiled gleefully.

Can you believe the amount of requests I have had from people who want to go home early?

Early? What a bunch of workshy fops.

I exclaimed with no little sarcasm.

I had been about to ask If I could leave early. Snow in Scotland tends to disrupt all forms of public transport and I had no intention of spending the night trapped in work. In fact I could think of nothing worse.

El Jefe pulled a chair up. He was grinning from ear to ear.

I mean come on, it's only a bit of snow eh!

Well, it is quite heavy.

The office suddenly became quite dark as the snowfall outside worsened.

El Jefe slowly spun a full 360 degrees on the chair. As he rotated back to face me, I practically had to dodge out of the way of his power-mad semi-erect penis.

I always say Boomdawg that if I can get into work and home again then so can anyone. So I told them no!

I nodded thoughtfully.

Don't you stay two streets away from here?

Well, yes.

Most of us stay several miles away.

And that Boomdawg, is why God invented public transport!

He declared triumphantly.

He spun around in his chair again. Even slower this time. With dramatic flair he inched back round and stopped to look me straight in the eye.

You live way out on the outskirts don't you?

Yup.

You weren't thinking of asking to go home early were you?

As he said this the lights flickered. He cackled and looked around wildly.

No, leaving early is for the weak.

I intoned in a mock robotic voice.

He peered at me suspiciously. Unsure if I was doubting his authority. Then he leaned forward and hissed...

I don't care how bad it gets. No-one gets to leave early. NO-ONE.

His eyes had a mad look to them, like those of a badger gnawing at a fig.

At that moment, one of the Directors entered.

Everyone, attention please. The snow is forecast to get worse over the next couple of hours. If you need to leave early then please do so.

El Jefe looked stricken. I whooped and patted him on the shoulder quite condescendingly.

You can hold the fort boss man. See ya!

I ran before the snow changed its mind.