A Buzz of Life

It started off as a buzz, yes, a constant buzz, it would not stop. A buzz that felt like it was in the back of my brain. Not in my my ears, but in my thoughts. The buzz drove me crazy, out of my mind.

Then one day that buzz turned into a whisper, a silent annoying whisper. A whisper that you hear when you pass by a crowd, and they start talking about you. You cant hear what they are saying, but deep down you know it is you they are talking about.

The blunt of there jokes, as if they want to point their fingers at you and laugh. I could not make it stop, the doctor said he could give me a pill then the whisper would go away. I hate drugs, let me be your zombie drug companies. Let me wait in line so you can feed me my breakfast, lunch, and dinner.

Yes I am hungry feed me my prescription. No I refuse to, I will not fall prey. The whispers got louder, now they were a mumble. I almost could make out a specific gender.

I could even count how many. I dont think I am going insane, but I still will not take any pills. I am annoyed now by the mumbles. If you have something to say to me please say it loud enough so I can hear.

Speak english, stop mumbling, I want to hear what you are saying. Annoyed? I will tell you whats annoying. That little mumble you do, and yes, you too. A quite laugh a slight smerk. Laugh at me will you, I am not the blunt of your jokes and I refuse to be.

You can not win. I will not lie hear staring at the specks on my ceiling and let you torment and abuse me. One by one they spoke to me. Paranoia in the back of my eye lids. A conspiracy brewing in my mind. They say they are out to get me. I am not sure who they are, but do I want to be taken?

A white coat just for me. I am sure they do not have my size. A respected establishment as they, they should be able to have one tailored to fit. I wonder if they have those coats in 100% cotton. That would feel nice.

I go out in public and they repeat every thing I say, and they correct me. I want that in a size 9. No you say a 9 1/2, thank you, but please shut up and let me speak. Did the man hear me say that? I am not sure but he looked.

Please give me two of those. Three of those. No I only want two. Do you have a place to be other than the back of my brain. Stop tapping there, that hurts.

You realize you are giving me a migrane. I am not sure who they are. I can not tell you where they are from. They talk to me all day. Sometimes one by one other times all at once.

I can not listen to them, I have sanity to hold close. People think I am weird, or a little bit crazy. Try having one person living inside your thoughts. That can get crazy, and then have four more move in.

Then when you thought all is well, they start back. Talking all at once, raise your hand, one at a time.

Do you have to argue now? I am trying to read.

I look in the mirror hoping to catch a glance, but no luck. I look like just any other guy on the street. You may think I am in deep thought, but really I am not. I am usually debating, If a tree falls in my mind am I the only one that hears it. Did it fall because it was old? Did one of the voices cut it down to make room for more.

Thought for rent: three bedroom brain, quite at times, but really spacious. Has an excellent veiw to the world outside, and just had the place sprayed for pest.

Thank you for reading. This is one I posted on wattpad under beastwithoutbeauty, and on steemit. I am hoping to get more out of you guys then else where. If you hate it tell me why, if you love it do the same.