Also Known as: How To Avoid a Flagging War
This morning at around 3am (Insomnia is a bitch), I saw a comment I objected to:
PS you have to vote up all my comments as well , its minnow back scratch
To me, this is showing the exact thing that could cause a problem later down the line.
He didn’t even ASK for an upvote, he INSISTED on one as though it was the LAW! or some sort of rule, or something.
I replied... and pointed out it wasn't the done thing...
So then, enter Mr Billy-Big-Balls into the arena…
He reacted with the swagger of someone that is used to pushing his head forward, showing off his mono-brow, hefting his meaty knuckles from the ground where they drag, increasing the callouses (at least those on the back of his hand… the callouses on the palms are entirely different) and getting his own way with intimidation alone.
I replied again, with a bit of advice and a few facts.
I AM mindful that a battle of wits requires both opponents to be fully armed, but I did believe, in all honesty, that my tiredness would counter at least some of what he’s obviously lacking…
Apparently not…
So I flagged all of his posts to show him threats are not my thing.
Then he did what no red-blooded male does – he called for back-up from his mate.
By this time, his rep had plummeted to 9 but I left it there and didn't flag any more of the posts. (I have since removed all the flags I put on every post - I'm not inhuman, I wanted to make a point).
Then Billy-Big-Balls’ friend, Bobby-Big-Balls came to the rescue and started flagging every comment and post I’ve made over the past… evening. I assume their voting power ran out because they didn’t get far.
Here’s the lesson:
As a newbie, you’re likely to step on a few toes as you make your way tentatively around this new Steemit ocean.
A few hints and tips will get you going in the right direction (ie: across the ocean, not plunging to the depths of negative rep).
If you cock-up, apologise. If you can’t manage an apology because your pride won’t let you, then fuck you, you deserve to get a negative rep.
An apology as simple as:
Oh, I’m sorry! I didn’t realise, I’ll edit my post right now.
Will probably get the flag removed, possibly get your apology upvoted (no promises) and maybe even get a follower or two because you admitted being a dick and apologized for it.
A few things you need to know:
Steemit is going to be here for a LONG time.
There are people on here that are clever – way cleverer than the majority of humans on the planet (so that includes you).
People have been here for more than a year – I believe Steemit started in April 2016 – and they (we) have been working on building our accounts since we got here.
Good manners and polite posts will go a long way to getting you and your account where you want to be. Being a dick will not – especially a dick with no experience, no respect and no manners.
Saying there are only two dozen talented people on this platform is INSANELY derogatory and you deserve every single post you ever make to get flagged repeatedly, at least twice, by EVERYONE that makes great content each and every day on here.
Think on this, Billy and Bobby: Only two dozen people on here are NOT writing shit and yet, you’re still down in that slurry getting no votes, no rewards and ultimately nowhere.
On the other hand, if you do decide this platform is worth a go (it is), then perhaps you’d like to figure out how you can get noticed in a good way and build your account up rather than getting it buried – not by me, I’ve removed all my flags and I’m giving you 12 hours to see this then I’m muting you so I’ll never see whether you progress or sink.
Here’s how I know you’ve flagged my comments - https://www.steemnow.com/
Because the effects of the multi-flagging didn’t show up.
This site shows you every keystroke you ever made from the time you joined up.
https://steemd.com
And this site shows where you are in the great scheme of things:
https://steemwhales.com
Proper interaction is what gets you followers, not comments demanding upvotes.
I'm nice and helpful, especially to newbies, but jumping on posts to demand an upvote is not the way to get good attention.
If you want advice, that's great, ask, you'll go far, with a lot of support. If you want a fast-buck and shortcuts to followers and money, not so much.
Edit He went back and tried to delete the offending post. Unfortunately, because I'd replied to it, he can't delete, so edit was the best he could hope for.
I edited my reply to him and added the bit back ;)
PS you have to vote up all my comments as well , its minnow back scratch
Naughty naughty... Blockchain's got your back...
All imaged sourced from Google's Free for use library
I love this post! You were kind enough to remove your flags and those two should be grateful. I've always believed that being polite and considerate gets you much further than being a butt and hopefully these two guys will catch on quickly, modify their behavior and end up writing some wonderful posts in the future. :D
Have an awesome day! :D
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Yeah, we can hope... but I think what will really happen is they'll put the blame on someone else and it'll all be everyone's fault but theirs and therefore, they don't need to modify their behaviour, everyone else does.
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If that is how it turns out at least you'll know you did the right thing and they made the choice not to. They will not do well here if that is what they think and that is kind of sad.
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Don't know how this guy spoke to you exactly and it's too late in the night to check, but isn't flagging him an overreaction? I mean, the way the text tells the story, it goes immediately from him demanding upvotes to you flagging his content. The guy as you presented him is I agree very unlikeable, but I don't know, I would just ignore him, maybe flag the comments themselves but not the account.
I don't know maybe it's my rather "permissive" nature making me feel ambivalent about this.
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Yes, if I had immediately flagged him, it would have been an overreaction. You're not wrong :)
If you flag comments, you're flagging the account, so there's no way around that.
The 'conversation' went downhill fast when he asked if I was a man dressed as a woman. None of his business if I was, but as I said... completely off-topic.
I removed every flag I posted and then saw that he and his friend had flagged (or tried to flag) as many of my posts as possible. Yes, I did laugh because I hadn't noticed.
Then I saw the abuse he levelled at a well-liked and respected member of Steemit, a guy that does so much good in his community and who reacted with grace and kindness to the abuse he received.
That's when I flagged the idiot and those flags will stay because he's been on Steemit as long as I have and yet he's whining that no one is giving him anything...
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I had the impression he was a newb, but if he's been here as long as you have, the excuses I can make up for him are fast diminishing!
Didn't even know that! I've never flagged anyone, nor been flagged. Even spammy comments on my posts. I guess I'll get around to doing my duty eventually.
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Yeah, it's looking more and more like it's what we're going to need to do - kind of like curating the whole Steemit Platform.
We have to take care if it, it's the only one we have :D
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I'll reply to this because it's easier...
He's had a go at @quinneaker - one of the speakers at SteemFest2.
Abuse
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yes it is very true that you say in this post,
each person commented according to the discussion contained in the post,
if the post is good, of course people give a good comment.
but vice versa, if the post contains the content is not good, it can damage the image of others, then like to give a bad comment on the post tersebiut, even will get a flag.
but, how do you respond, if people commented well, but got the flag.
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things i hate , rude people , arrogant people - seems that those guys are like that ! i hope they get the message and start being more civilized! i don't know why many people act like that on social media but you did well @michelle.gent ! i resteemed the post , upvoted and feel blessed to have you being around ! Greetings from Greece and a lot of respect for your attitude and writing ! :)
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Thank you. I appreciate your comment and the resteem :)
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Now that is a guide, apt use of the 'Bully' loading screen images - if i wasn't savvy with the web world, i'd have likely thought I had to upvote all comments regardless of how meaningless they were, thank you @michelle.gent
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Yes, that's what I'm worried about. That kind of rumour quickly becomes 'law' and it doesn't help.
The thing is, your vote doesn't just help the one you upvote. If you place it on a good post, you reap the rewards too. Curation is what earns voters money.
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This is great, I've resteemed because I think more newbie people need to read this
<
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Thank you, I appreciate that.
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This is more than helpful to everyone especially one working as hard as i am to get a place here, i mean i have a culture of being polite and humble and i can just imagine how you must have felt when you saw the comments..... anyways its one thing i have learnt here too... not everyone would have manners its left to those that do to show others... thank you for the post, it will guide me and many i know... upvoted and resteemed.... followed too
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Thank you. Your comments and resteem are appreciated.
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I'm always amazed at people's journey here on steemit. They always start one way and hopefully most learn to read blogs like your and be better. Hopefully no more flag wars for a while.
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I can only hope. Thank you :)
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@michelle.gent. I found this very interesting. But are there still people like this in the world that demand to get things from people even when they know they don't deserve it?.
Just trying to imagine how he would have said it if is not writing buy talking. lol.
I really like the way you handled the situation. It shows how kind you you are and i celebrate you for that.
I hope a lot of people learn from this and try to put some hard-work to what they are writing or doing on this platform instead of pissing people off.
Thanks for showing kindness despite his behavior.
Happy to be associated with you on this platform.
Re-steeming this for so many other members here to see.
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Haha perfectly fitting .gif!
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flagging, scary to me
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great post , he sounds awful knuckle dragging mono brow , but totally out witted by your superior wit and intelligence , game , set and match , so many superior minds prowling the block chain , its so reassuring to have a fast witted tough door man on the job , protecting all the vulnerable noobs ,
LMFAO
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You've not learned much have you? No apology to the guy you were 'joking' with, no apology to the minnow you were trying to scam for upvotes and you've obviously not read the newbie advice further up on this blog.
It's like you just don't want to learn about getting on on this platform. Still, I suppose your rebellious devil-may-care attitude is far more precious to you and to admit you were wrong would be soft.
There's a massive opportunity to be had here and you're pissing all over it. Dogs do that, but that's because it's their instinct. If all you're going on is instinct and you're not able to learn how to improve, then the description of you that you obviously don't like or you wouldn't have mentioned it, it spot on. Does michelle.gent know you then? It seems like she does.
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im sorry you are right
https://steemit.com/steem/@tonyboney/well-back-to-cat-pictures-sorry
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sorry mr steem-press , i have apologised to those i have offended and would like to offer you my sincere apology for being a twat , i will make an effort not to offend as much as possible
https://steemit.com/steem/@tonyboney/well-back-to-cat-pictures-sorry
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I have thought about flagging a couple of rude or uncalled-for negative posts and replies, but instead decided to either say nothing at all or kill the poster with kindness, especially if it was directed at me. I'm not afraid to flag someone who truly deserves it, but I want to give everyone the benefit of doubt and make sure that what they posted was meant to be intentionally hurtful and that it represented a genuine character flaw that others need to be warned about. There have been times when I have said rude things in error or ignorance that deserved an equally rude response. I would have preferred a softer word of advice rather than a blast of expletives, but I have tried to learn to take my medicine and put on a happy face in knowing that I had just learned a good lesson the hard way. Of course repeated abuse after a point has been made would more likely promote and angry and equally well-deserved response in return.
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Yes. I gave him the benefit of the doubt and unflagged his posts.
I later found a string of abusive replies to one of the most gentle and respectful guy on Steemit (possibly the whole planet) and I flagged him for that.
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Good for you!
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sorry michelle , i was a complete little twat , and have realised i misread you , didnt realise you were a biker as well , sorry for give my caustic humour
https://steemit.com/steem/@tonyboney/well-back-to-cat-pictures-sorry
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I'm not sure why me being a biker is relevant but I accept your apology.
Now, if you'd like to go and apologise to @quinneaker properly, I'll remove all the flags and you can get back to working on this platform.
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bikers look out for one another , its a rule i run by, ( i also owned a 350 lc ) , and yes i will apologise to quinneaker , i was just jealous of his good looks and didge skills
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Oh yeah, that's true, but we're also not averse to telling someone when they're being a twat and going too far.
You went too far but you've apologised to me and I do think @quinneaker will be gracious enough to accept your apology too. After that, you're going to be on a steep learning curve I think.
Get your head round this and you'll not regret joining.
Don't make the payouts your goal, follow people that you find interesting, reply to people in a polite manner and try not to joke with people that don't know your sense of humour yet.
I'm not promising you'll be a millionaire by Christmas but you'll have a better Rep than you have now ;)
Added by Edit... I'll have a word with a few others who may have flagged you too...
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thank you Michelle , i am a bit of a twat and even amongst bikers i know they think im a bit of a twat , they think i ride like a twat and give them all a bad name , im going to make an effort
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Glad to hear it. You've got a few comments to edit, I think, a few apologies to make and then I think you'll be only a little tarnished and it'll be easy enough to if not forget, then at least forgive.
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I hope you actually got some sleep last night. Hopefully they have learnt you don't mess with a Northern lass (with a high rep)!
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Haha! no.. not much... I think I scared myself to death when I woke up 03:30(ish) and my story from last night kicked in...
I had no chance of a lie-in either... Stripes back at the vet for her op check-up (she's fine, I'm tired) LOL
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Lack of sleep is never good!
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Mhen thats some war of words. A saying goes thus" education might get you to the peak of sucess, it is your character that sustains you at the top"! Most people are ego driven and always want things done their way! I can only advise you kill hate with Love. It will go a long way. Thanks
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Killing with kindness, otherwise known as 'Niceing them to death' :)
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That's one reason I have mixed feelings about the growth of the platform. It's good to have new members join but there will always be people who act like this. Most of the new people I come across here (I'm still fairly new myself) are friendly and don't mean any harm when they breach the code of etiquette. It's usually because they just don't understand what's expected of them yet.
However, I have come across one or two who can't be reasoned with so I just choose to ignore them instead of getting into a flag war. I'm more interested in protecting my reputation. If I had more voting power and a higher rep score it may be a bit different but for now I'll leave the more drastic forms of "education" to people who have the means to effectively counter egregious abuse (namely a high reputation and a lot of SP).
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I agree, it's getting more prevalent, I think.
I do believe it's more down to the way we are as a whole, rather than the result of Steemit, though ;)
"I want it ALL and I want it NOW!"
There's no 'rule' or 'code' of etiquette on Steemit, per se, but I do think newbies are missing a trick when they inwardly-focus rather than look outside their boundaries to see the boundaries aren't really there.
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You're right this behavior is prevalent in so many other aspects of our society. I want it all and I want it NOW! So true!
There are many ways to earn here and being ugly with people is not one of them.
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I think it works across the whole of our society - help if you can and even if you can't, be kind.
I actually thought he was a newbie - the attitude and arrogant 'knowledge' of the 'minnow-back-scratch' gave me that impression - but he's been here as long as I have and if he's not 'made it' yet, he's doing something wrong... and in that case, personally, I would have figured it out by now.
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Wow that's kind of sad in his case. Most people I've seen who have been here as long as you or longer have definitely got it figured out and done well for themselves. I guess the ones who've been here that long and aren't getting much attention are in that situation for a good reason...refusing to learn from their mistakes.
I appreciate you taking time to give me feedback and your thoughts on my comments. It can be overwhelming for me to keep up with the modest amount of replies that I get on my own posts and I can only imagine how many responses you get!
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Haha! It sure is... hence the late reply to this (sorry).
I do feel a little sorry for the fool, I think his excuse of 'It was only a joke' should have been left back at school and he should have found a different way to make people laugh by now.
I also think this platform isn't like any other, there are so many diverse personalities and absolutely clever people here that juvenile jokes really must be kept strictly for people you know well and you know they'll take what you say as a joke.
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Well done!
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You are using the right language for newbie. Cool :)
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Thank you.
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Thanks @michelle.gent for bringing this to light. Don't feel bad, you did what you had to do. I'm starting to see that you come here and you either get it, or you don't. I flagged a post with a tip, and explanation. I tried to help this guy. He kept asking for help how to get off the blacklist. Still, he kept up the behaviors that everyone was telling him NOT to do. It really is in their best interest to be polite, and play nice. We certainly aren't being mean. I personally would love to see everyone who steps foot in this amazing universe we are creating to make it on here! May the wind blow all of this away and peaceful vibes return!!!! Hugs!
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Thank you.
Some people don't want to just be nice and get along, do they?
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It seems like those are the type that don't last long here.....
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Lol... a very interesting read! I love how you proved your point and still gave them a chance to learn from the whole experience and understand how things work. Not sure how long that's gonna take them though... I'm struggling to get my work noticed and it gets frustrating sometimes but this behavior is a lot more than frustration. I don't think they understand Steemit and its value system at all.
Well, now that you've mentioned it, I could use some support. I'm having trouble getting my work noticed. 😁
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I can only repeat what I was told. Keep writing, keep communicating, keep responding to posts and being polite.
You've had a bit of attention from upvoters recently, why do you think you're having trouble getting it noticed?
I'm afraid I don't have the answers. I just do what I do. I keep writing, keep responding to everyone that drops me an interesting response and I vary my work.
Good Luck!
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Sound words of advice, thank you.
I would say the low interaction levels (low pageviews, low visibility, etc); but I now realize that it's probably something that will change when the new communities and new UI/UX features are implemented. For now though, I'll heed your advice and have fun until the new Steemit arrives.
Take care. ☺
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good tutorial, but I doubt that that kind of pretended-big-balls newbies actually read or listen to any advice. ;)
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Haha fair comment :)
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Some people never learn...sigh. I like your style in putting them in their place. Bullies of the sandbox never get far. They like to throw sand but don't like it when it gets tossed back. Thank you for taking a stand and giving courage to the rest of us.
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I think of it this way:
If no one flags bad behaviour, it continues because there's no guidance. A swift: 'Please don't do that' sometimes works and if not there's always the: 'I told you not to do that...' leading on to the bigger: BOOM!
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Hhhhaahahaha.. Wft. I wonder how that guy will feel seeing his rep. Or maybe he doesn't even know about flagging. Most of them do not read steemit whitepaper neither do they have someone who will guide them. They might have the mindset that steemit is only money making network. I have seen someone with -2 reputation. Well I just hope others will learn from his mistake.
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I unflagged his posts because I've made my point.
I think this is starting to get out of hand and it needs to be put right.
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It's Well Bro. Things we will try as much as possible to educate them.
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i agree it is nice to flag then remove after it has sunk in, i hadn't thought to remove my flags before. As for muting i have muted around 10 people in the past three months, mainly due to fraud or arrogance and ignorance used aggressively. I wonder if i mute people can they still see my blogs? If so we should be able to properly block those who seek to annoy us. Rock on -upvoted
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Thank you!
The abuse wasn't confined to my reply. He has attacked a respected member of the Steemit community since, too.
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This place has attracted a few people with borderline personality disorder and other issues, it is unfortunate you came across this guy.
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Oh I've had my fair-share of those ;)
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Brilliant! Resteemed.
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Thank you! :)
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I'm new, and I am open and grateful to learn all I can as quickly as I can. I have been very fortunate. Everyone I have interacted with has been very nice. The high intellect level is so refreshing. The gifts that people in here posses are mind-boggling. From coding to creative writing, truly exceptional.
I did bite my tongue this morning. I really wanted to express my disdain to someone who was obviously going to the Philipines to rape children who are trafficked. I chose not to engage someone that violent and damaged.
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You're not wrong! So much intelligence!
I can't even think of a response to that :(
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Thank you, it was the second time I came across guys eager to indulge in trafficked kids in the Philipines this week. The first time was in person, I easily overheard a lunch conversation from a friend of a family member. It so extremely disturbing beyond comprehension. I didn't know what to do, my family member didn't know what was going on.
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No... I don't know what to advise, either... horrible situation :(
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If this is all a game then doing shit will get you the same.
If this is all a game, becoming creator is awesome, not gay.
Karma.
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True :)
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Oh, I did not sleep at that time either :) Insomnia is an excellent occasion to put the flag on spam!
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LOL Yep... nice and relaxing... back to sleep quickly... :D
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legendary words mate.. super inspiring :)
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Haha! Thank you :)
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Wow!
You are a very kind person.
Those guys deserve to be flagged but you forgave them anyway...
I wonder how billy and bobby would be feeling right now.
Lol.
This is good lesson to all newbies especially the 'spambots'.
Thank you @michelle.gent
Please accept my humble upvote, resteem and standing ovation.
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Thank you! I appreciate your comments and the ovation ;)
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Wow . Amazing . . I like your post . . Good word for a post @michelle.gent
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Damn. That's pretty accurate, especially with the "Now That's What I call Shit Posting" slipped in there. I died when I saw that. For people to come to Steemit with that kind of attitude shows how they've handled experiences in the past, and how others let people get away with negativity on the daily.
I was new once, still am- but adopting positive and cooperative mindsets, with the willingness to be open and learn go a super long way. I've seeen some of the flag wars on here in the past, and I count my blessings for not having to be in one yet.
I love this post because someone will take it the wrong way, and that actually comes from inexperience. If you are nice to people, they will be nice to you. It baffles me how some people come in here with no manners.
They don't even have to agree with your opinion, just not be a dick and start shit. He got dropped all the way to 9, I think he got lucky, because people can get put at zero or even negative.
...and this is why votes are weighted.
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Hey @shello (great name by the way),
Yeah, you got that spot-on I think.
The way people react when someone points out they're being a bit 'dick-ish' says a lot.
When I worked on the doors, if someone behaved like that - condescending and arrogant, especially to me - he'd (yeah, usually a guy with 'something to prove') be watched carefully and usually had to be persuaded to leave before he wanted to...
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Thanks for getting back to me so fast. If somebody has to prove something, then they usually don't have it. Nobody wants to be the bad guy, but people can't act however they want. There may not be written rules, but the ettiquette on Steemit is a little better than most sites c:
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Yeah, I think it's because we're such a tight-knit community - especially so after last year's SteemFest. We all made a LOT of friends there and those who couldn't get to it followed and enjoyed the Fest almost as much as those of us lucky enough to be there did.
That made a sturdy platform for friendships and that's grown and spread as a community feeling, which of course generates more community feeling because one 'generation' of Steemians fosters the next.
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Steemfest sounds like a life changing event to attend. I made a lot of good friends through online gaming, but if were to meet them all at once, the shock and awe to see them would become a memory I would never forget. I would imagine Steemfest to be larger than even that scale.
Every community needs a stable foundation, and knowing that Steemit is barely a year and a half old says a lot for the people involved and the standards that everyone holds themselves to.
Practices passed down and remixed with each new generation. The fact that Steemit is still "Beta" constantly stuns me at how polished and well thought out many parts of the site are. I can only imagine what will happen in years to come. Thank you for sharing some of your experience, this reply alone gave me more appreciation for the community.
Stay classy,
@shello
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Sorry for the delay in responding.
I used to play games online too - Q2 mainly and that led to me getting an online journalist position at BarrysWorld Magazine - oh boy... that was a while ago!
I've never met a more fascinating, enthralling, amusing, intelligent and kind bunch of people as we met last year.
There will be more this year and I really can't wait!
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Oh Quake 2? Never judge a book huh :D Don't worry, I know we can all get a little busy sometimes.
Meeting people that you can build strong and intelligent relationships are always welcomed, I hope that you have lots of fun when you go! I think I will make going to Steemfest a goal for myself next year.
Stay classy!
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My philosophy in this whole steemit thing is this:
Just be nice guy
Just don't comment on stuff that potentially triggers you, and if you notice that you get triggered by stuff you read on your computer, work a bit on yourself, its all futile in the end so why work yourself up about what another person says.
And please don't start arguments on things that really don't matter at all.
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That's a good philosophy but if we all turn a blind eye, things still happen.
The only thing necessary for the triumph of evil is for good men to do nothing. Edmund Burke
Source
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Yea, i was once warned by @steemcleaners, i jusst quickly apologised and edited the tag, its all just as simple as that
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That's it... it's all it takes. I don't respond well to bullies. :)
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Guide Life very good @michelle.gent
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