How to: Fear Less & Live More🗝

in life •  8 years ago  (edited)

Rule your mind or it will rule you

The greatest prison people live in, is the fear of what other people think


Fear. The number one thing that keeps you away from anything you want.

(In-depth Instagram caption)

Many of us desire change, in whatever area of life that may be, but for some reason that change doesn't happen and we wonder why. Sometimes we come up with reasons that sound almost so convincing that we don't realize they actually are well-dressed excuses.

Nobody and nothing is more responsible for your life and for change, than you. 

We tend to highlight our weaknesses and insecurities rather than our strengths, until we begin to question our own abilities and decision making. It is in you genetics to dislike change, and view anything that is outside of your comfort zone as scary and risky. 

  • Humans are afraid of the unknown
  • Humans are driven by habits
  • Humans are obsessed with the past

And it makes great sense if you think about it. Your brain's main purpose is to protect you from danger and keep you alive.

Back in time when our ancestors had to fight over food and shelter, this built in mechanism was developed to help you survive. Based on your past experiences, you could trust the things you had done before, feel save eating certain things and walking certain paths. Trying something new, like a certain fruit could mean your death. It deeply roots in our brain that the unknown means risk and risk means danger, which is why we feel fear or anxiety whenever we try something where the outcome is not of certainty. 

FEAR USED TO KEEP US SAFE, NOW IT KEEPS US SMALL! 

In today's world however this mechanism in most cases doesn't help, but hurt you. This mechanism cannot distinguish between an endangering life-decision and small risks associated to any kind of change.
We are more than aware that there are risks with any decision, but we ignore that there's usually the same amount of risk in not doing something, as there is in doing something. Sometimes making the decision to "not make the decision" or "just not do it" is by far the more devastating one.

A great example is entrepreneurship and why it's considered  a "risky" choice. The traditional path has been walked a billion times before. When you study, you get a degree, which gets you a job. This path your mind conducts as certain and safe, meanwhile it is afraid of the path fewer have walked, despite the fact that this exact path is the only one you want to go. Your inner-voice, that built in mechanism doesn't care about what you want, all it wants to do is protect you from the unknown, even if the unknown means your greatest success and the most fulfilling life.

Now there are two options: Hide and remain where you're at OR speak to your fear, let it know that you are grateful for its presence, but that in this case you got it under control, you know what you want and you are going to make the decisions regarding your life, not your fear. Your fear is not you! and it need to learn that. The more you teach it, the better it listens.

Just like the fear of the unknown is deeply installed within us, self-doubt is like fear's big sister, originally there to protect us from making mistakes, stupid decisions that could cost us our lives. It serves to support our self-assessment, make sure that we think, do research, ask questions, analyze and evaluate before reaching daring to try something. If we would not doubt that we could do some things in life, like jump off a building and fly, I doubt I'd still be around (did I just write this? yes I did :D )

So what's my point? Once again, thank self-doubt every time it comes around for being there.

“Generally, self-doubt is connected to vulnerability. When we’re open and exposed, we may get hurt or make mistakes. So self-doubt serves as protection by holding us back or asking for reassurance.!

Self-doubt can be a healthy tool, but only if not given too much care. Welcome self-doubt every time it comes around as part of the creative process, connected to change. If you've been an in a cooperate job your whole life, your family knows that, your friends do, but deep inside you feel the desire to become an actor/actress, you likely to have fear and self-doubt accompany you soon. 

Try to catch them like "oh there they are, I've been waiting for you" and then consciously do it anyway. If you ask other people, and as humans we seek the advice of others' over our own, you might get discouraged soon, since other people have the mechanism of fear and self-doubt installed in themselves, so their false beliefs would turn into destructive advice. 

Learn to trust yourself, by committing to making a decision on your own. When you practice this skill continually, you will restore your lost confidence. Only when we practice building up strong confidence, we will be able to act inspite of fear, criticism, self-doubt, the opinions of others and as a result achieve the impossible, break limitations, unleash our potential, and inspire many who feel stuck in self-doubt and fear.

I hope you enjoyed the read. I would love to know what you would be doing, if you weren't afraid OR something you did inspite of fear and how it turned out.

Much love,

- Mrs.Steemit

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🙀 Kann es gar nicht glauben. The sweet, smart and incredible @mrs.steemit is back. So good to see your Brilliant write Ups again 💕

Ohh das freut mich sehr, besonders von dir zu hören! :) Appreciate the support <3

🦋🐬💕

Fantastic post and phenomenal advice. We would all do well to follow it. Upvoted, Resteemed and Followed! Looking forward to more content from you.

Appreciate the support! Thank you :)

  ·  8 years ago (edited)

This is a topic I've been struggling with for a long time. Until I came to the realisation that most challenges that I encountered, were crushed every time. You got yourself an extra follower. Great post!

Thanks! It's one of those topics, I'm sure most human beings can relate to, but I would bet only a few experience those kind of realizations. Glad you did!

You are no doubt Mr.Steemit great post every time you share.

That's sweet of you! Appreciated :)

thanks and most welcome.

I really enjoyed this message. It was well thought out and well presented. A beautiful Carpe Diem vibe to it, allowing your mind to reach out to your soul and decide what next. You just got another follower. Just resteemed and upvoted as well... Keep Steemin!

I'm glad you did. This kind of feedback makes me happy, knowing that I'm not the only one who thinks those kind of topics/messages need to be shared more often.

Another great read, thanks for sharing @mrs.steemit!

As you rightly said that fear can be your worst enemy going forward, but once you learn to control it, it can also be your best friend which makes you more alert at situations!

Thanks Rea! <3

I’m not gonna lie. When I’ve seen the photo with yet another “life quote” that I’ve seen countless times already on Facebook I was getting worried. But I continued reading your post and was pleasantly surprised, maybe even moved a bit. I generally don’t fear any path that’s not plain dangerous. At least that is what I believe. Truth is though that there are some sections of my life where I’m bounded by my inner fear that I fail to recognize! Thanks for that @mrs.steemit. Following you.

Thank you! I'm glad you continued reading. I try to mainly write about what in my opinion hasn't been said enough, or realized by many people. Your comment is much appreciated, can't wait to hear your opinion on some topics I have coming up :)

See you there;)

FEAR USED TO KEEP US SAFE, NOW IT KEEPS US SMALL!
Love this !
I believe everyone has fears but also everyone has to deal different with it! I would love to read how the Steemians deal with it in your comments!

Great post like always babe

Thanks love! How true, there are many approaches but the first step remains awareness.

I totally agree with that !!!

Great post!
Trust & belief in yourself is very important to overcome fear.
Thanks for sharing & Steem on :)

Thanks! I agree :)

You are killing it!

FEAR USED TO KEEP US SAFE, NOW IT KEEPS US SMALL!

This hits home! I wasn't the MOST fearful dude and it took me a while to understand this simple fact: the circumstances around me were because of me...

So the day I took matter in my own hands? The day I decided to conquer fear? Was the day I felt liberated. Time and time again, I am reminded that we truly hold the keys to our life.

And time and time again, I realize this fear is simply an obstacle that I have to overcome.

Great post. Definitely inspired. That too at 1 am. Lol :)

Awesome addition! It's definitely a process, but the liberation truly is priceless.
Glad you enjoyed the read :)

"The only thing to fear is fear itself" -- isn't that how it goes... Great post!

Thanks for supporting :)

Fear is the only thing stopping you from achieving what you desire.
I back you up 100% on this post and I'm glad there are people like.
Fear is the only thing that stops us from achieving our full potential and I too am going to write a philosophical article about it soon.
Cheers and keep up the good work.

Awesome! let me know when it's published :)

You can have a look it's in my blog page.
And I must say your post gave me the motivation to write this so thank you :3

Back in time when our ancestors had to fight over food and shelter, this built in mechanism was developed to help you survive. Based on your past experiences, you could trust the things you had done before, feel save eating certain things and walking certain paths. Trying something new, like a certain fruit could mean your death. It deeply roots in our brain that the unknown means risk and risk means danger, which is why we feel fear or anxiety whenever we try something where the outcome is not of certainty.

That helped me understand why ............ nice post

That makes my heart happy! Thanks for commenting :)

Great timing for this. I'm doing some new things and starting to have a tinge of fear of what people what people think. This was helpful!

Glad to here you found the post useful. Admitting fear is already a step in the right direction :)

meep

I really enjoyed it ! Was very motivating.

Glad you did

Great post. It's incredible how much energy, focus, and aspiration we "waste" on fear. Glad to see that flipped around for you and thanks for sharing!

Thank you! So true, which is why I like to blog about those kind of 'bigger picture' reminders.

I live full of life for long time. I feel so much better, happy, full of ideas. I love my life and I wish everybody to feel the same. Fear can kill us so let's just say life is too beautiful to worry about it. I always say what needs to happen it will happen. So try to believe and live. Thank you for your amazing post. I follow you if you would like to you welcome to follow mine. Have a fantastic day 🤗

That is beautiful and rare at the same time! Sadly not many people can say that they are "full of life", maybe you should write a blogpost and share your secret.

Really good posting @mrs.steemit,

Thanks!

Like most posts of this kind, they are rather nice and theoretical, but not very practical. Although Meryl Streep's reply resonated deeply within me. I'm very eager to know how the biological side plays a part. Civilized humans are so feeble and fragile compared to our ancestors who lived in tribes. Add to this all the advertisers who like to make you look small and buy their stuff. No wonder we feel this way!

That Facebook post from Meryl Streep is mind blowing - and so true!
Thanks for such an inspiring post @mrs.steemit. You are totally right: the easy choice follows an instinctive self-protection, however the excitement starts outside of comfort zones.
Resteemed.
Have a great weekend!

Thanks so much, I'm happy you felt inspired! Your support is much appreciated. Just followed back :)

Thanks for the follow and enjoy your Sunday :)

Great Thinking..

Bringing fear to the fore is much appreciated, Thank you,
Fear at every turn, challenges our expansion. Pushing, soon reveals it an illusion.

Great Post @mrs.steemit, and a very good read. "the universe is mental , the mind is all" you now have a new follower, hope you follow me as well.

Thank you! Sure, I will check out your blog :)

  ·  8 years ago (edited)

Thanks , my first and only blog so far is called beauty is in the eye of the beholder. i'm sure you would appreciate it. Cheers

what's your instagram? same name on steemit?

Will put it in my blogposts soon... ( uma_hg)

beauty and brains I can see ur thoughts energy and passion threw you're post ur mind s beauty outshines the physical u are perfect enjoy

That's a sweet compliment. Thanks! :)

Great post! Thanks for sharing. Definitely following you!

I love your posts! I agree totally with the 'ship at the shore' metaphor. We human beings were meant for achieving great things, but sometimes that requires taking some prudent risk. Thanks for sharing (and reminding me of what it means to conquer fear)!

Upvoted and followed. I really enjoyed this.