Honest Vulnerability... This is me Introducing myself to steemit

Hi I'm Nichole and I've been on steemit for a month now and I still haven't been able to bring myself to record my intro video.... or really any of the many videos I have in mind to share with you all. See, I've become so disconnected in my transformation that I quite literally lack community and any kind of support system. I have always been on the painfully shy side of the spectrum and my family is very small, divided, and struggling with addiction or they believe my spirituality, faith, and my gifts of clarvoyance, claraudience, divination, and optimism mean that I'm somehow crazy. So last year I embarked on this new journey of self discovery and mastery.


During this time I learned what I meant to take care of myself emotionally and physically, I lost 145 pounds, spent several hours in meditation every day, studied and researched all I could about tarot and astrology, and connected with some incredible mentors who help me grow more than I ever thought possible. During this time I also so they released the relationships that were a continued source of negativity that continue to track me down vibrationally. Now on top of all of this I am single full-time mom of two boys ages six and 10 who I've been solely responsible for their entire lives. Fast forward to May of this year, I decided to pack up everything that I could get rid of what I couldn't, and for the first time in my life take a risk and A leap of faith by leaving my apartment which was a unhealthy and dark environment. I took all of my savings and decided to head east with my dog, kids, and what I could fit in my truck in hopes of starting a new life where I was free to be the spiritual optimistic loving person I felt I couldn't be surrounded by so many people Who wanted me to stay the same.
I thought I had thoroughly planned everything, an internship with the spiritual coach, enough money to get me there and then enough to get by until I started earning an income. Unfortunately the trip didn't go as planned. I was faced with numerous obstacles on the 17 hour journey itself and met with even more when I arrived. I ended up having to return home or to the state I called home rather, only now, I had no apartment, no furnishings, no money and actually I was now in the negative, and no clear view on what direction I should even go in. I knew that I was destined for bigger things. I knew that I had these incredible gifts of vision with the impetus for healing and helping others understand their journey and path through my tarot reading's, I know this because I've seen it play out over and over again. I've seen the help I provide encourage and stir the manifestation of dreams and desires that were recognized or embraced. I've seen and spoken into existence children, houses, jobs, relationships, financial bonuses, and so much more and all in the course of a year. Yet I continue to struggle with my own manifestations of abundance. I've struggled with receiving or asking for help and I've struggled with even receiving payment for the work that I've done.
Now, the woman who is so kindly allowed me to stay and rent a room in her house even though I now owe her 2 months past rent, Will be moving in a month and I still have no stable source of income to provide for me and my children. When I first came across steemit I hoped that this would be the catalyst that would catapult me into a world where I was seen. I know my readings will speak for themselves but it's spreading the awareness that I'm here is what holds me back because I am such an introvert and it's difficult for me to socialize and network. So I'm finally opening up, being vulnerable, and showing all of you my own pain and struggle. I'm hoping that you'll see me, not just see me but really see me and take the time to help me in whatever form you're able to do so whether that is up voting, sharing my story with others who may be able to help, or donating. (All who donate will be given the opportunity to schedule a tarot reading with me) but my bills are piling up, my alternator went out on my truck, my boys need clothes and supplies for the new school year and I need to catch up on my rent and build a stable client base so that I may continue to afford rent where I'm at after my landlord moves (if I want to stay I can but I'll have to cover the mortgage on my own or with other room mates) and for the first time in my life I'm reaching out asking for help and trusting that the love and light that I've sent out to the universe will indeed return to me tenfold. If you have any questions, would like to schedule a reading, or anything else please reach out. Thank you all for your love and support 💚 Nichole James

"The world has become a source of hidden internal bleeding and it is only in our pain and suffering that we expose the wound so that we may then heal it. This is why I believe that those who have experienced incredible amounts of pain are blessed with the greatest vision of change and healing. Be the change, not the pain." - Nichole James