I was 18 years old and going to my first real house party with a girl I just met at the mall.
But she Dropped me off and said "be right back if you need me just call,
.....meanwhile
I was feeling dizzy, drinking cups of freedom.
The alcohol made me free like a free one.
I got to act like a woman for the night
That strawberry vodka and sprite had me feeling right,
The music was good but my drink was better,
Thinking to myself whoever is throwing this party is quite clever,
Big house with a mini bar, I don't think I've had this much fun in life this far,
Drinking down my emotions and taking in the attention,
I didn't know splashing water on my face wasn't a prevention,
Prevention of getting drunk as a skunk while dudes are trying to fuck,
I had my guard down while I was doing my dance, throwing my hands in the air,
Closed my eyes for a second and then felt my shirt tear
I open my eyes to see this man pulling on the back of my shirt
I politely smiled and smacked the top of his hand then shook my head,
He demanded a dance, so he got in front of me and lead,
I wasn't mad for long, even though I knew something felt wrong,
Yet I still danced with him for just one song,
Trying my make an excuse that I was tired of dancing and needed a break,
He got me another drink and it was more then my little body could take,
My plan to go to the bathroom was a failed attempt,
The following statements I hold myself exempt,
The same man came behind me and another appeared,
One grabbed my hands while the other one cheered,
They spun me around until I fell to the ground,
Before I knew it I was in the air, heading to a room with only a bed and a chair,
I wasn't feeling good or seeing very well for that matter,
After this one night, my innocence was shattered,
The music was bumping through the walls
My cries for help are soon just muffled distressed calls,
I closed my eyes so maybe I could wake up from this nightmare,
One had me pinned down, while the other one just stared.
I was trying to kick the dude in the nuts,
He reacted, backhanded me so hard but made sure he didn't leave any cuts,
I was out like a light. flash
You think the story ends but not quite,
I woke up to that man early the next morning in that same bed,
I look down my leg and it appears I have bled.
Embarrassed, confused and body shot with pain,
Everything that happened my mind couldn't retain
I tried to get up quietly
But he threw his arm around me so abruptly,
He's Still sleeping, so I inch my way out of his grasp
So scared to make a noise I couldn't even gasp
While I was searching for my pants
I hear a sleepy voice ask "if I want to go for another dance"
I say No in the quietest voice
I put my pants on and left the room as if I had a choice,
I run the nearest bathroom and realized I didn't have my phone,
At that very moment, I felt so empty and alone,
I couldn't cry, I didn't ask why
Just kept thinking who the fuck is this guy,
Looking in the mirror with mascara all down my face,
The image of his face I wish I could erase,
I cleaned myself up and my first instinct was to run,
I couldn't face what had just been done,
Thinking if I tell everyone, they would look at me like I was just having fun.
I went upstairs to find women laid out in the middle of the floor,
I just needed to find my phone and start heading towards the door,
Remember that second guy I told you about
Of course, he pops up without a shadow of a doubt,
He, to my surprise, asked if I needed a ride home and showed me to my phone,
He told me his friend was drunk and I must forgive him,
I took the ride to get the fuck up out that place,
Never wanted to look like a charity case so I kept my mouth closed
I took that L and it blows
...
I'm here to tell you to stay aware of your surrounding and the people you choose to make your friends!
Listen more and talk less. Some people start to heal the moment they feel like they have been heard.
PeaceofDiamond
Being there alone was my first mistake but not the reason I should have gotten raped.
Wow thanks for sharing peace of diamond! It's hard to find peace with these kind of things but it's possible
Much love and light
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