Too slow to react to a jerk

There are these people walking around who always have a quick, witty remark at the ready. I am not one of those people. I am more like a "Could you put that in an e-mail, so I can get back to you in a day or two?" kinda person.

And that, my friends, sucks when you have to quickly respond to a jerk!

Alright, so yesterday I was playing Guild Wars 2 World vs World during their stupid beta week with stupid people I don't know (yes, I hate this beta). I joined a newly forming squad (big group of players) to hopefully get some big fights against an enemy team.

Now, games will sometimes have these 'perfect' class builds to use in a certain type of gaming mode, which stand out above the rest. We call them 'meta builds'. World vs World has a couple of those. I do not play one of those.

One of my team mates asked me what kinda build I had and I responded with "Probably not a WvW approved one", to which he replied "Use a WvW approved one".

I then proceeded to very calmly, very nicely, very openly explain to this little prick that I can't use the meta build, because ever since my burnout, I haven't been able to properly learn a new build and I would just end up dying all the time. To which he then responded "So you're retarted".

Well that escalated quickly!

Oh boy. I could have said so many things to this uneducated little moron who was never properly raised by his parents. Or this brainless dude who was suffering from small-dick syndrome.

I could have said "I'm actually a very smart and nice person you just insulted for no good reason.", or "Who the hell do you think you are, talking to me like that!", or "What is going wrong in your life to make you feel like you have to act out in such a way?", or "I don't have time for uneducated, dickless morons like you, so I'll just report you, block you and wish you good luck with whatever sad little life you have that makes you act like this.", etc. etc.

I still haven't decided which response is best, but to be completely honest, it doesn't matter anymore! Because I should have said it right at that very moment. Instead, I said "Wow, you're nice", reported him for verbal abuse and paid him no more attention.

That was a perfectly fine response, but it could have been better!

I get quite frustrated sometimes about the time I need to properly process input and then formulate a good response to this. It's not just in situations with little pricks like these, it's also very annoying in a working environment. I am usually pretty quiet during a meeting, because I receive a lot of information to process and I process it deeply and need time to give it a good place, connect it with already exisiting information and then react to it if needed. I also think that if you don't have something useful to say, you should just stay quiet. This means I'll have lots of smart remarks and important questions... after the meeting.

My quick responses at any given moment might be incomplete, but ask me to reply later, in an e-mail, and I'll write you one that's airtight. I am a superhero e-mail writer, but a crappy quick responder.

This isn't bad persé, were it not that we live in a world where a silver tongue will get you anywhere, whereas a more quiet, considerate person will quickly get overlooked.

I'm really not sure where I'm going with this, but I guess this is to make the macho population aware that there are plenty of silent forces out there you shouldn't overlook, just because they don't have a witty remark at the ready or need some time to properly respond to your question.

Oh! And you shouldn't act like a little, uneducated jerk, just because you're a faceless person online. Words still hurt, or get you banned/suspended (let's hope).

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