Standing in the Wilderness

Standing in the Wilderness
Wilderness is a powerful word which, for me, conjures up visions of wild winds screeching across the moors like a scene from a dickens novel. The dictionary echoes this using words such as ‘uncultivated’, ‘uninhabited’, ‘empty’, ‘pathless’ however it also provides a different perspective of being ‘an area essentially undisturbed by human activity’. This second perspective creates images of calmness, beauty and solidarity; that in amongst the chaos of life stands places of tranquillity and stillness. A simply google images search throws up a multitude of images that are reflective of the second perspective and it is this one that this post focuses on.

I recently bought ‘Braving the Wilderness’ by Brene Brown. I love the blend of research and practice that she brings in an accessible way. Her work for this book stems from a quote by Maya Angelou:
‘you are only free when you realise that you belong no place- you belong ever place – no place at all. The price is high, the reward is great’.
Brene explores this quote and concept in her book and reading it prompted me to consider what this means for me….
As humans, it seems to me, we seek out acceptance and belonging. There are many writings about finding your place in the world, fitting in, building relationships which all present an outward focus - that is how we fit in with others. If you are like me, this meant a lot of years of trying to blend in and be accepted, working out the right thing to say to the right people at the right time. However do we ever belong when we conform, for me this mean compromising who I am and wearing the shawl of what was expected of me in a given scenario. The thinking in the book is that belonging is about being comfortable with who you are and in turn that it does not matter where you.
For me finding the peaceful wilderness was about letting go of what people think and doing what I think is right (as opposed to what I should do in a given scenario) and being ok with standing alone. Disengaging from gossip and recognising that the people who gossip to you will also gossip about you. The lyrics of ‘Let me Fall’ really resonated and I still listen to this music by Josh Groban when I need a gentle reminder.
Let Me Fall (from Cirque du Soleil)
Josh Groban
Let me fall
Let me climb
There´s a moment when fear
And dream must collide
Someone I am
Is waiting for courage
The one I want
The one I will become
Will catch me
So let me fall
If I must fall
I won´t heed your warnings
I won´t hear them
All I ask
All I need
Let me open whichever
Door I might open
Let me fall
If I fall
Through the phoenix may
Or may not rise
I will dance so freely
Holding on to no one
You can hold me only
If you too will fall
Away from all these
Useless fears and chains
Someone I am
Is waiting for my courage
The one I want
The one I will become
Will catch me
So let me fall
If I must fall
I won´t heed your warnings
I won´t hear
Let me fall
If I fall
There´s no reason
To miss this one chance
This perfect moment
Just let me fall