Learn To LOVE Yourself!

in life •  8 years ago 

Love is all around us. Love is probably one of the most discussed topics ever.
But one aspect of love is never really mentioned - loving yourself.

Most humans desperately want to be liked or loved by others. But loving themselves? Hardly anyone thinks of that.

When we think of self-love, most people think of being narcissistic or egoistic. But that's not what loving yourself means.

It means deeply appreciating yourself, accepting your flaws and weaknesses, and even beginning to love them. You need to love yourself first if you truly want to love others.

These are some of the positive effects of loving yourself:

  • You are more emotionally stable/balanced. You are not depending on the approval or recognition from other people. You know your worth so it's harder to hurt you, and at the same time you will accept constructive criticism more easily.
  • Your self-confidence will grow! When you truly love yourself, you are not depending on the affection from other people. You are not afraid of losing your approval for someone else or being rejected, which is why you can say what you truly mean and make new contacts with others easier.
  • You are more successful. If you don't blame yourself or make yourself feel bad for making a mistake, you will take risks more easily. Your self-confidence grows and it will be easier for you to deal with problems. All of these factors lead to more success in your personal and career life.
  • You will be more generous towards others. If you love yourself, you will go easier on others, forgive them faster,and tolerate their flaws more easily.
  • You appear more attractive to others. This may be only a side effect, but if you love yourself you will have a positive attitude that others will notice. Also, other people will treat you with respect because they see that you are just the way you are and don't let other people change you.


So here are my 5 tips on how you can learn to love yourself:


Be proud of yourself!

Think about five things where you're really proud of yourself. You can also write them down to visualize this even more. Make yourself clear that YOU have achieved something in your life and you can be proud of it!

Of course everybody makes mistakes, but don't be too hard on yourself. Look back on your life, what you've accomplished, and be proud. And when you do something good in the future or finish a difficult task, praise yourself! We don't do that enough. Give yourself some more credit!

Make some time for yourself!

We are so busy everyday - doing things for our work, or for others.
But when was the last time you have actually sat down and thought about improving yourself?

Give yourself a 10-15 minute time slot for this everyday. Sit down and talk to yourself: "I like myself. There is absolutely nothing wrong with me. How could I become an even better version of myself?"

If you really want to get serious with this task, sit down in front of a mirror and tell those things to yourself. It might feel strange at first, 

Act like your own best friend!

Think about how you act with your friends. When they're down, you cheer them up. You are there for them. And you don't criticize them constantly - if only, then constructively.

The relationship to yourself is very important, so treat it like your most important friendship!
And stop constantly criticizing yourself. You are making your own life way too hard, and overexaggerating things!

Take good care of yourself!

Taking good care of our body and mind is an important part of loving ourselves. Of course, if you love something you want it to be in its best condition!
So be aware of what you put into your body or what you put it through. Get some workouts in your daily routine. But at the same time, be sure to treat yourself as well: Arrange a spa-day maybe once a month, or simply run a nice bath. Or even just moisturize your body with a nice lotion,  really taking your time and thanking your body for doing such a good job all the time.

The same goes for your mind: Don't stress yourself, get some alone time, wind down, relax! Your mind and body should be in good health if you love yourself.

Accept all your thoughts and emotions!

I have already explained that it's important not to criticize yourself too much.
So what if you're having a bad day, if you are feeling down and having negative thoughts?

Of course you don't want them to take control, but first of all accept them. Accept that you are only human, you are allowed to have a bad day, you are allowed to feel angry or jealous or cry.
Loving yourself also means accepting your flaws.
After you have had your time grieving, take some deep breaths, and focus on viewing your situation from a positive perspective, and acting towards getting out of it!


If you truly learn to love yourself, your life will shift and evolve positively! You will feel more self-confident, balanced  and have more successful relationships.
Give it a try!



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© Sirwinchester


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  ·  8 years ago (edited)

Reading your post made me aware of that need of loving myself more. At this moment I am already applying some of the methods you described but not all of them! I will add that you need the to find the right balance of self loving.
Too much self loving will isolate you from the real world because you will start doing only what you want and that will cause severe relation problems with your family and friends. You have to clearly define what you need and what is your role in your community, then to try to create one good mix of decisions about when to give love to the people you care about or to the community you are part of and when to give love to yourself!

I feel like you have good advices for every kind of topic. Thank you!

I agree completely Sir, but I have to do this:

"I DON'T WANT TO BELONG TO ANY CLUB THAT WILL ACCEPT PEOPLE LIKE ME AS A MEMBER" Groucho Marx.

Self-loathing at it's finest :)

you're right, well I guess at least he knows what type of person he is, and what he wants/doesn't want

Loving our lives is also a really good way to attract positive feelings from the other and good attititude.

When I started believing in myself my life dramatically improved, since now I'm in a deep relationship with my boyfriend even because we value ourselves. We don't "complete", we "love". It's a different meaning and it's a more powerful union that just a "puzzle" one.

great input!
If you learn to truly love and value yourself, it will change the way you see relationships, and it sounds like you have found the right way to do it

Author, Life, Executive Coach, Change Motivator, Speaker “José Micard Teixeira" inspired me to self reflect because I have so many questions reading his wonderful poetry.

I made a list of 10 things I like about myself. You might like this advice and practise as well :
https://steemit.com/philosophy/@mammasitta/the-greatest-gift-of-life-is-being-able-to-like-who-you-are

Wow!
This is an AWESOME and TRULY valuable post and it looks like MANY people recognize it!
Congratulations on your success and thank you for continuing to share quality content with REAL value!
There may be nothing more important than loving/listening to ones self, as you cannot truly be happy let alone help anyone else unless you are practicing this your self.
I could go on and on but you already wrote a post! haha
Today I posted a powerful piece that runs in the same vein as this post about being the example that inspires revolutions.
I hope you might check it out and appreciate it.
Bless Brother~*~
Revolution is a perspective away∞§∞

https://steemit.com/philosophy/@quinneaker/being-the-change-where-true-revolution-begins-quotes-from-respected-masters-and-personal-experience

First I truly agree that loving yourself has so many benefits. But accepting your flaws and weaknesses is good to realize your problems. You taught me not to love my flaws. Just accept them to get stronger!!!

Exactly, you must love yourself first so that will others will love wholeheartedly , and by means of loving yourself is to have a self respect and accepting who you are and who you can be in the future.

awesome and very helpful article. I really enjoy your posts about self-improvement, I feel like we could become a better version of yourselves all the time

thank you, always trying to help! And you are right, we never stop learning until we die, learning and improving ourselves is one of the most important aspects in life

"act like your own best friend", that's a great and very helpful tip. really enjoyed this post, interesting topic

it's an easy rule when you first hear it, but harder to execute. definitely worth a try though. Why would you cheer up and support your friends, but only criticize yourself? YOU deserve your own time, affection and dedication as well as anyone else!

always a fan of your inspirational quotes, keep it up

I think quotes have a much deeper meaning than normal pictures so they are quite fitting for an inspirational topic like this one. glad you liked it!

very important topic, thanks for the reminder!

thank you, glad you enjoyed it!

you are like a daily dose of inspiration! great post once again

happy to hear that you enjoyed the post!

Wow. This is very great writing. Thanks!

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this may be hard to execute sometimes, but its definitely worth giving a try!

it's hard at the beginning but once you start, you'll realize how rewarding it is

great writing @sirwinchester
love yourself before loving others

I really struggle with accepting or even loving myself. thanks for the reminder and sharing your tips, I'll try it out!

it can be hard at first, but it's definitely worth trying out! If you manage to do it, you will feel the improvement instantly

awesome post @sirwinchester

Да, вы правы! Полюби себя - и мир тебя полюбит!

красиво сказано

such a great topic, thx for sharing. very nice post as always, and I love your quote design

thank you, glad you enjoy it :)

you always put so much effort in your posts. upvoted!!

thanks for the compliment, appreciate it

thanks for the reminder @sirwinchester :)

Upvoted because this is by far the best post you've ever written!
Like what the song said "Learning to love yourself is the greatest love of all!" and it is - and is the very gateway to being able to truly love another person.
I raise my glass to you on that!

On : "There is absolutely nothing wrong with me." How about restate that into something positive - I am enough. I am okay. I accept myself completely instead of using the "not". I've been taught to use positive self affirmations because the human brain has a tendency to pick up the negatives. Just sharing...