Laughing my ass off big time. Some of my favorite quotes, jokes that I have created over my life time plus others. # 2

in life •  7 years ago  (edited)

REALLY FUNNY REALLY FUNNY REALLY FUNNY REALLY FUNNY REALLY FUNNY REALLY FUNNY REALLY FUNNY REALLY FUNNY

Will you find these funny or are you a prude?

Why does my left testicle always hang lower than my right one? I always feel a little lopsided! I feel like I'm under steering when ever I turn right. What would be the female equivalent? Please enlighten me?

Two Irish man approaching each other. "Top of the morning to ya Paddy!" "Aye, its a glorious day!" replies old man Murphy. " What that you got there Murphy?" ask Paddy. " Why I got some here fish, Paddy.Tell you what. If you can guess how many fish I got in this here bag, I'll give you both of them!
downloadirish.jpg

Paddy to Murphy- "Three?"

I truly love the Irish. Never met a more wonderful people!

According to a recent study. When the question of weather it would

be classed as full sex if you have intercourse with your partner for less than a minute. 92 % men said yes, whereas only 4 % of woman agreed.
people-3136711__340.jpg

If you ever needed proof of how differently the sexes are wired, this says it all!

All I want to know. Where do I find these 4% of woman!? LOL

A man and a chicken approaching each other.
download222.jpg
The chicken ask the man, "What's your name?" The man replies in a smooth,deep and oozing voice, "Bond; James Bond.""
James_Bond_(Daniel_Craig)_-_Profile.png
The man decides to ask the chicken his name.The chicken not wanting to be outdone,boisterously with every ounce of pride,says loudly "MY NAME IS KEN!"Followed by an even louder "CHHHHHIIIICCCCCKKKK KENNNNNNNNN!!!!!

When signing off your usual love messages or textes
20hugs-and-kisses-images.png
Why not try something a little different from the usual boring xxxxxxxx and ooooooo. Try using some of the following. ! = sucking your nipples, L = licking the garden of Eden, 69 = self explanatory, F= fondling or S =slapping your ass. Make up heaps more. So a completed sign off would look like this.

HUGSNEW.png

If you get into trouble with using the above, blame it all on the milkman,postman or the pool guy. As a back up just say its HTML code!

If any of this made you laugh. Check out my other post :https://steemit.com/vincentb/@skytronia/laughing-my-ass-off-big-time-some-of-my-favorite-quotes-jokes-that-i-have-created-over-my-life-time-plus-others-slap-that-ass

Images sourced from pixabay, google free images, fotojet and free images.

downloawwed (1).png

PLEASE UP VOTE

life funny humor vincentb sex
7 years ago by

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      ·  7 years ago (edited)

    [Deleted]

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      1 vote
      [-]
        ·  7 years ago 

      Thank you and I hope it put a smile on your face. Still learning how to set up my post page. Lots to set but getting a little better with each post. Hopefully I can reach a point where it is easy and exactly how I want it.
      Actually like your little picture too.

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        [-]
          ·  7 years ago (edited)

        [Deleted]

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          1 vote
          [-]
            ·  7 years ago 

          You are most definitely welcome.

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            [-]
              ·  7 years ago 

            ha😂ha😂ha😂

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              1 vote
              [-]
                ·  7 years ago 

              Hoped you enjoyed?

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                [-]
                  ·  7 years ago 

                This post is qualified for a resteem by the Abasinkanga Resteem Service

                @skytronia just resteemed this post to 4800 followers

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                  [-]
                    ·  7 years ago 

                  thanks

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                    [-]
                      ·  7 years ago 

                    Guess most people are prudes!

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                      [-]
                        ·  7 years ago 

                      You got a 2.36% upvote from @mercurybot courtesy of @skytronia!

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                        [-]
                          ·  7 years ago 

                        thank you

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                        1 vote
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                          ·  7 years ago 

                        This post has received a 0.42% upvote from thanks to: @skytronia.
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                          [-]
                            ·  7 years ago 

                          thanks

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                            [-]
                              ·  7 years ago 

                            You got a 6.76% upvote from @ipromote courtesy of @skytronia!
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                              [-]
                                ·  7 years ago 

                              thanks

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                                  ·  7 years ago 

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                                  Reveal Comment
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                                    ·  7 years ago 

                                  Thanks

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