I have found out upon my self forced exile from steemit is that I have been a god awful blogger. My posts are WILDLY uploaded and seem random at best. SO I am going to see if I can make a post everyday and see how long I can last without consulting a doctor. I am thinking a week at best. If I start popping Ritalin from a pez dispenser I could push it to 3. Here we go:

Why does this matter?

I can't pull a good reason out of my ass fast enough without doing permanent anal destruction. But maybe it can aspire others to try their own self-indulgent challenges. I am not sure if that hyphenated word works here but screw it, IN IT GOES.

BUT I do know a steemian who has told me forever I am so close to being a big dog on here, I just need a something something.
And said steemian, the yoda to my young luke, @battleaxe is taking the big step, marriage. And if she is willing to try something that big, I should emulate her. No there will not be a Mrs Swolesome anytime soon. I fully intend on getting a few weeks of attention from gold diggers when steem moons. I realize that I type as fast as I think, so I will try and make stuff up as I go along and hope peeps like it and give me the upvotes.

I'M KIDDING (kinda).

I have always taken hours to plan posts so much in fact that it feels more like work then fun. And if I only make a buck with these posts. Then I shall have fun with a juice box in my hand damn it.

#Release The BattleAxe Memes.

Drink it in like prison wine, it is so bad for you but you still crave it.

If I am supported in my efforts of bullshittery for good, I will showcase atleast one @battleaxe meme on each of these posts. You know you wanna.

I used to plan and do word charts, and the DRAPES strategy to try and plot out my posts. It was exhausting, depressing and I still have paper cuts.

And I looked like a sleep deprived pasty badger after big posts. Not sexy.

Unless it is for Dust and Shadows I shall now write without my filter attached. That is right, every crazy little thing before this post was me TRYING to censor myself. Like squeezing yourself into your girlfriends shirt to make her laugh and realize it is so snug you lost all circulation in your nipples.

Not worth it anymore!

I shall free my man titties and breathe in the fresh smell of freedom as I unleash Swolesomeitis? Swolesomeness! Swoleynation? Copyright terms are still in progress, but just so you guys and gals and jellyfish freedom fighters know, do not expect shit posts. I fully intend to ramble on about any topic you guys suggest for a non shit amount of time. That's right! Until I get my sea legs of bullshitting my way through posting back, I will write about whatever topic you guys suggest for this challenge.

Dinosaur jokes? Some might get Megasaurass about it.

Football? Oh daddy yes, sock it to me.

Sex puns? Eh I might slide something in, but it could be a tight fit...

Just comment below!

The fun is endless! Just let me rest for a few minutes in between the virtual action to pee and stretch. It could get hella kinky up in here but its OK. I believe in BYONT and I brought my own neck tie, And it has Deadpool on it ;). Which I am seeing tonight, If anyone spoils it I will use the nearest phallic object and play amateur proctologist.

Today's kill count: my family thinking that I will become a preacher.

Amen.