"I feel like every little thing I go to do, I just absolutely fucking suck at. Even things I've done for ages, I still just am terrible. No redeeming skills whatsoever, so getting a job isn't going to happen unless it's retail, and that shit is soul-sucking. I feel like less than ordinary .
So it's like, I hide away in video games - yeah, I feel incredibly inadequate in most of those, too. So many things I go to do and struggle at, and everyone else is just like, "oh I did that blindfolded with my arms tied behind my back while cooking dinner, I don't get why you're having issues". Or I'll do something I see as "hard" and be real proud of it, but apparently my milestone is trivial and nothing to be proud of.
This is a theme with everything I keep trying to do from games to jobs. I just suck at like everything that is apparently seen as simple. Can't even hold down a job for more than a few months at a time. It's pathetic.
Just kinda wanted to vent. Feel like absolute shit and got nothing helpful from my mother when I went to vent to her about it, hoping this platform will be more understanding of this feeling than her."