When You No Longer Need to Prove Yourself, That is Your Best Life

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A few years ago, I was working at a chain restaurant in southern France.

There was a grizzled old gentleman who often came for lunch. He was plain and ordinary, but he was kind, and his talks like a gentleman and a funny man. He called me "young man," grinning and asked: "Young man, what is the recommended dessert today?"

The restaurant has a recommended desserts each day, which is four cents cheaper than other desserts.

The old gentleman will also ask: "Young man?" Can you add a flower to my dessert? I want to drink with coffee. ”

Cream flower, usually added to the problem of dessert, like scorched or leftover, add cream flowers to cover the shortcomings and improve the look. Anyway, the restaurant is not mine, no need to consider the cost, the old gentleman is very kind, so I add for him every time.

He was always happy to say: "Thank you, you are the best young man!" "That tone is unquestionable sincere.

Once he came to dinner at night but the recommended dessert is sold out. The old gentleman was a little disappointed and said: "It's a pity, today is my birthday." ”

I feel a little pity for him, because he is always alone, and always choose the cheapest recommended dessert.

I said: "You go pay first after I finished baking, I will bring to you."

That day recommended dessert is "Normandy Apple Tart." I deliberately added two cream flowers and gave him a small candle.

He was holding a glass of wine, and when he saw the cake, his face lit up, he said: "You know, young man." My mother was Norman, when I was a child, my mother made me an apple tart every week. ”

He opened the wallet, took out a 50-euro note and gave it to me, "Thank you."

I refused, but the old man put the money in my hand and said: "Accept the money, it’s birthday present."

It was too good to refuse, and I gladly accepted the money.

When I returned to my workstation, the manager asked, "Do you know who he is?"

I shook my head. The manager said with his hand, "Did you see the gas station across the road, and the empty grape patch behind the gas station?" It’s all his. Also, the land of our restaurant was also his.

What!？ I was surprised. "Then why is he always eat here?" and also order the daily recommended dessert. ”

The cashier was calling the manager over, and he shrugged as he walked, "The rich man's world, we won't understand."

In the early autumn, I went to the library to queue up for computers. I met the old man at the gate, and he wore the usual plain shirt and khaki pants, and the beard trimmed neatly.

He smiled and greeted me. Behind on the wall, there is a poster, which is printed with a similar face to his. I was surprised to see the poster and looked at him; he said: "Oh, I donated some books."

I can't help but cover my mouth and say, wow, you're rich!

He laughed, then said: "Young man, when you grow up, you will understand that money is only a string of numbers, the value is more important. When you see me next time, don't say I am rich. ”

He waved and went away. In the crowd, he was an ordinary old man, doesn’t looks like a rich man.

I looked at him and felt that it’s really good to be rich. If I am rich, I won’t wear that ordinary cloth shirt, not to eat the recommended dessert in our restaurant. I want to wear branded clothes every day, I have to make a custom Ferrari, although I do not even have a driver's license, who cares because I am rich ...

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For many, many years, I have always thought that wealth determines the value of life.

I could not reach the old gentleman's level because I did not accumulate enough wealth.

A person who can not meet their own needs, there is no right to think about the so-called hierarchy, pattern, realm, and self-cultivation the problem. 

If you want to straighten up your back, live comfortable, live decently, then you have to bend down first, lower your head, and put all your effort to the utmost.

Today, we live in an overly commercialized society where people are high up every day, righteous words to say: The gap between first class and economy class; the difference between the branded and the knockoff.

Since we can not find our own value, then change it to find a value that we can see.

In fact, it is a false image, it is not real.

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Two days ago, My mother was going to meet her friend. Her itinerary is very full, to be able to optimize time, she took my mother to a cocktail party. She needs to greet the CEO first, so she asked my mother to take a seat first.

The party is buffet-style, with some tables to eat next to it. At the table, everyone just introduces themselves, when it is my mother’s turn, an ordinary middle-aged woman who no one care, she just casually nodded.

The people at the table, eating, and boasting, said, "I just came back from Dubai, we lived in a sailing house, and the other said we just bought a villa in Shanghai ...

She really doesn't like this kind of cocktail party. Because in this type of occasion, can truly show the classification in human society.

While she was chatting, her friend, standing beside the CEO, finally asked my mother to come over. She quickly ran over for a toast, and the CEO even give my mother a business card.

After the CEO left, the people around the table keep trying to talk with my mother’s friend and trying to guess what her story.

She just smiled and said, "I am a researcher, we have recently done a project with the company, so we met before. ”

When they are going to leave, my mother asked her, "Why didn't you say?"

She is the head of the European Union's funded laboratory project, and her research on cutting-edge could produce billions of dollars in profits.

She shrugs and says, "So what?" I still am a child wife, still have 20 years of mortgage, and a middle-aged woman. In fact, at my age, I do not need others to affirm my value. ”

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Everyone hopes that they can live with dignity, respect, and admiration from others. We often think that others respect our money, in fact, what others respect is our value.

When young and arrogant, we are afraid of others to look down on us, want to let everyone know our achievements, all become tattoos on forehead so that others will glance at the awe.

But after living half a decade, I know who I am, how much I am worth, and I can judge my own value rather than needing respect from others to satisfy myself.

But life is not a war, there is no so-called win and lose.

The best state of life, no longer need to do all the living, and watching others show off the in front of you, and no longer need to do your best to sell yourself.

Of course, we should do our best in our life, but not for others, for ourselves.