Clear Values from Chaos
One of the positive outcomes of going through a time of trouble, dissonance or chaos is that a time of chaos often precipitates a re-evaluation of personal values.
Values are the essence of who we are. Values are principles that you hold to be of worth in your life. Values are those things considered right, worthwhile, and desirable - the basis of guiding principles and standards. Examples of values are: honesty, integrity, freedom, community, social responsibility, authenticity etc. ‘Crystal values’ are those values that are so important that if not present in your life will cause your life to shatter. Think of what would happen if you dropped a crystal ball. ‘Rubber values’ are those values that you can drop for awhile with no problem and will come bouncing back when necessary. Think of what happens when you drop a rubber ball.
Getting really clear on the values that are most important to you, will give you a framework for making decisions, taking forward movement and assessing dissonance in your life.
Let me tell you about a client of mine. Carol had identified that she held ‘social responsibility’ and ‘respect for nature’ as very strong values. She found out that the company she was working for was pumping toxic waste into the local watershed. She decided that she could no longer work for that company and in fact, felt she needed to report the company for the poor environmental business practices. In spite of the fact that being unemployed was not attractive, Carol stayed true to her clear values and resigned. While she had to deal with some short- term financial issues, this decision was worth it to her as she gained so much in the areas of self-honoring and self respect.
Is how you live your life in sync with your personal values? If it is, you likely feel great, in balance and fulfilled. If how you are living your life is out of sync with your values, you may feel discontented, frustrated and not all there, kind of like you are living someone else’s life.
Use these Life coaching tips to give yourself the time to gain or re-gain clarity about your values and how you use your values in your life:
3 Life Coaching Tips to help determine your values:
- Set aside about 30 minutes and first create a list of value words and then ponder and identify which ones are your crystal values and rubber values. Most people find that they have about 4 crystal values and about 4-6 rubber values. Let me know if you need help with this exercise!
- Think of a chaotic time in your life and ask yourself what role values or ‘values out of sync’ played in the chaos.
- Acknowledge and honour yourself for doing this exercise. It may seem simple, however having clear values is a foundational Life practice.
Although gaining clarity on your values and how you use them is already a huge gift to yourself, it strengthens your commitment to live by your values if you also add in the treat!