This post is not religious, cultist, or propaganding, it was made for those who are stressed about life, others, feel judged and in a perpetual worrying.
This is not a magic recipe, it is giving a ancestral point of view to live peacefully. This concept is based on a single thing: when you feel bad about yourself, it is due to your inner judge who judges you. You would not feel bad if someone you ignore is talking trash to you. That's because your inner judge decides to not judge yourself on what someone you despite says to you. To apply this, you need to follow 4 fairly simple rules:
- Have your word be impeccable.
This might be 60% of the chords alone. Do you believe in magic? Well you should. Because every body on this Earth has magical powers. What are those? Your speaking. What you say has incredible powers over other people. And like a friend spider's uncle of mine used to say: "great powers come with great responsabilities". You can use those powers to do white magic and black magic as well. Do you want an example? Glad you asked!
Imagine a mother and her daughter. Her daughter is innocent and pure. Actually, she sings. She loves singing, and she's good at it. She sings often and her mother, even though she likes to hear her sing, never says anything. But one day, the mother is stressed. She comes back from work, she got harrassed by a collegue, and all her dead lines are over. She needs calm. And hearing her daughter sing is the last thing she needs at this moment. She start to yell at her, to say that what she sings is awful, and she should never sing again. She changer her daughter forever by saying this. She could have become a professionnal singer, but she never dared singing again, fearing to be bad.
This is a very contextual example, but a conversation is all about being contextual. For every context, you can give that kind of constructive or destructive scenario. This first rule is about that.
"Impeccable" is to take in an old-fashionned way. Indeed, those chords were made centuries ago, so the language used is that old too. It does NOT mean you have to look for people to be happy with your words. "impeccable" comes from Latin "impeccabilis" which means "with no sin in it" It is a religious term, but with a general meaning. A sin is not a specific biblic behavior. It is a word that means "devoid of truth". If you go back to the global meaning of "impeccable", you get a double negation of truth. So impeccable just mean "truth".
In other words, you need your words to reflect your truth.
Yeah, I precise "your" truth because everyone's truth is different, and there is no such thing as a unique, universal truth. This rule tells you to be true to your way of thinking with the others. Because if you say what you believe is true, you will never be able to blame yourself for what you were saying, because you were being honnest. Even if you say a truth that hurts someone (i.e. "I think you're fat"), you said the truth, and if the person you spoke to is hurt, it is only because they feel judged. They are hurt because they have a problem with themselves, not with you.
- Whatever happens, do NOT take it personnal
This is a protection from the black magic people can try to use on you. For instance, if someone insults you, they spit poison on you. By taking it in an unpersonnal way, you immunising yourself against this poison.
As I previously said: we all perceive the world in a different way, with a unique truth to everyone. When someone makes something that is supposed to be harmful to you, may it be relevant or not, this persons speaks according to THEIR truth, not yours. If they do something harmful, it is because they've got a issue, not you.
Please note that this rule doesn't mean you have to ignore every word you don't like. It means you need to look at what you're hearing with an outside perspective, as if you were not involved in it in an emotionnal way (you still might be involved in a physical, technical way).
For instance, if I tell you you are stupid after an action you did, you're not so concerned about it. I'm just either telling my vision I have of you, or I am trying to hurt you. In both ways, the only person personnaly involved is me, not you.
Even if someone kills you, it is not to take personnaly, it is your killer who has an issue. But it doesn't mean you shouldn't try to survive to the murder (which is why it is important to differentiate your involvment in an emotionnal or a physical way)!
If you do this, you will
- Do not assume anything
By this, I mean any conclusion you could take about an event without knowing the full facts.
For instance, you should not assume this kind of things:
"She's far too young for him. She must be a gold digger."
"He did not wish me a happy birthday. He doesn't care about me at all."
"My girlfriend declined my proposal. She doesn'ty love me that much after all."
"He came late with a woman inside his car. He's cheating on me."
Again, please note that I am not saying you shouldn't be concerned about a potentially cheating husband, but you should NOT make any early conclusion about his behavior.
We all never know what the big picture is, and our brain, hating not to know, tries to make up a coherent story by filling the lack of what you know about it. A coherent story does NOT mean it is true.
Here is a personnal example. I have a girlfriend. We wanted to celebrate our couple anniversary after a day of work. We had a meeting at a restaurant at 7pm, immediatly after work (which ends at 6pm for both of us).
I was not there at 8pm. She tried to call me like 15 times, but without any answer. I arrive at 9pm, with an other female's fragrance, and lipstick on my lips. She slapped me right on my face, echoing in the entire restaurant, and explosed into tears. Everyone would have done that. Everyone would have thought I just cheated on her.
What if I told you this: I went to the barber after work, to get a haircut for the restaurant. I was busy on my phone, while my female hairdresser was doing my hair. She then suddenly falled on me, with the burning hairdryer falling right on my phone, breaking it. She was unconscious. Heart attack. I asked to someone to call for an ambulance, while I gave her heart massage and induced breathing. She was wearing glowing red lipstick and smelled of strong perfume. I gave her assistance until the ambulance arrived. I then came with her at the hospital. She was my usual hairdresser, I liked her, and wanted to make sure she would survive this. I stayed for 1 hour at the hospital until a doctor came to me to say she would be fine. With the stress was cooling down, I remembered my girlfriend, waiting for me, I then remembered my phone, burned to death. I asked for a phone to the doctors, but they were not allowed to wear any during working time. I then rushed as fast as I could to the restaurant, to get bitch-slapped.
So yeah, morality, DO NOT ASSUME.
- Apply the 3 first rules the best you can
We all have ups and downs. Today, you will not be as able to have impeccable words as tomorrow. And that's OK. As long as you do your best, you cannot blame yourself, even if it was worse than yesterday. Just do your best, and you can never feel bad about failing at those rules :)
If you apply those 4 rules, you will live a simpler, happier and more confident life ;)
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