Did you like eating in the canteen? Personally, I've always hated it. I still remember the little round tables, the little yellow chairs all around, the very particular smell that reigned in them - half grease, half bleach, yum! and this ball of anguish that rose in me at the thought of having to go there.
I have to say, I'm the tough guy at the table, and you've always seen it.
I hate raw vegetables; just the smell disturbs my stomach. I'm not a meat lover unless it's white, but vegetables, why not, but only in soup, the fruits I don't talk to you about it, in short, I've been a real kid for 30 years whose favorite dish is between pasta, nuggets and gnocchi.
The menus of the canteen were therefore, as you can imagine, perfectly suited to my very varied tastes.
Not to mention that at the time, approximately 30 years ago, the pedagogical approach was significantly different from that of today: in the canteen, whether you like it or not, you were forced to eat.
So I remember the anguish before I went there, the uneasiness I felt once at the table, the times when I ended up vomiting from being forced, and the distress of my parents when they were summoned because again I had not swallowed anything during the day.
And so, today, I'm also a mom. Three kids, including two girls.
Who eats in the canteen. And who eats nothing
Well, actually so. The big one's eating now. I mean, pretty much. She's at least tasting it.
But this is the result of a long battle of several years and above all of a lot of time, listening and respect.
Food is quite a touchy subject at home, and I really don't want it to become so with my children, so we went slowly, very gently.
My big one normally eats lunch.
The son has always eaten well wherever he went; he likes almost everything except eggs, so there's not too much trouble on this side.
And then there's the little one.
The little girl was eating everything until she was eating nothing.
I mean, she's eating the little ones. Pasta, French fries (but not just any of them, only those from the Mc Do’s), knackis, nuggets and mashed potatoes and also cakes and Pom' Potes, beware! Pay for your food balance, I know.
However, since I am quite mobile by nature and I know that putting pressure is often running to failure, I tend to let youth happen. It's my third, they each had their time at the table, it will pass.
Except at school, they don't see it like that.
And she's got a pig-ish character, you know.
So, between the fact that she doesn't like anything and the fact that she would like to go home for lunch, she doesn't eat ANYTHING at school. At all. Like, not even bread. That camel.
It started at the beginning of the school year, but with the weeks and patience of specialized territorial agents of nursery schools (known as ATSEM) we managed to move forward (a little bit). Before the All Saints' holidays, she ate bread, and I saw it as the victory of the World Cup.
And then there was the holidays, and the leisure centre outside of school, with other people, another canteen... And since then, she hasn't eaten in the canteen. Nothing at all. Not even bread anymore.
So I quickly got caught by the ATSEM in the evening and got her back, because she doesn't eat anything, she ends her days tired. We discussed, negotiated, the ATSEM makes the sorting in the plate so that she eats at least 3 grains of rice, and then comes the time of the word in the notebook.
Parents Summoned! We have to find a way for her to eat.
I don't mind, buddies. But I'm not sure how.
Forcing her, obviously it's useless and I'm perfectly against it, it goes without saying but it's better if I say so. It's not by telling her that feeding is a balance of power that we're going to advance.
Yelling doesn't work.
Explain, negotiate, neither.
We freaked him out a little bit too, but it didn't work.
Pretending ignorance, Still not.
I was blown into the atrium to pick her up at lunchtime. I'll take you guys, but I can't do it. And besides, I think it would only displace the problem and go in her direction, I'm not sure that it does her any favors in the long run.
So I don't know.
Her brother was asked if he would agree to eat with her at lunch. See if it motivates her, even if I admit that I'm a bit of a believer. Let's give it a try.
I also offered to bring her meal back, as I did for a while with my eldest daughter. Even if I think it's crap on the organization side, not just for friends, and once again it's going in her direction and convey a message a little distorted to the child with the character of pig.
Having said that, I fully understand that the situation is complicated for the school and that it is tricky to face a child who swallows nothing during the day. Especially when one knows that day, 7:30-16:30 without eating, since fortunately she swallows her snack.
Surely we have our share of responsibility because we are not the kind of people who force children to eat, let alone offer them menus from the great gastronomy. Especially since, as we know that they don't necessarily eat everything in the canteen, we try to make them eat in the evening, and therefore do what they love most - a dog biting his tail, bravo the calf.
So there you go. If any of you have any ideas or solutions, I'll take it. I take your experiences from the canteen if you like, and compassion also because sometimes kids can be a bit boring.