I workevery weekend, sometimes late at night, and the people in the parking lot will see that I push my shopping cart to tears because of scenarios about what would happen if I had the courage to really kill myself because of the scenarios I played in my head.
I play scenarios in my head about telling my parents about my depression and kicking me out of the house. I have visions of my successful friends seeing me as homeless in the streets. I cry every night to sleep, thinking that my only 4 friends in my life will leave me after high school like I never existed.
But that's okay because if I can go to 8 years no one will comfort me, I can definitely go for the rest of my life. Whether I die alone or beside someone who loves me, what are the chances that we will both go in the same direction after death?
All I'm saying is that life is fine, human or not. And in this time of the world people don't care about anyone but themselves, and the people who care about you are probably where you will never find them.
