Too Loving..

"Still how long Qi?" I turned and it turns out he is Taufik best friend who is closest to me. "How long will you think of him Sauqi?" He continued. I just glanced at it no matter the question. "He has left you! But you still ... "Before he continued his conversation I immediately cut. "He must be back Fik! I believe that! "I replied firmly. "But you realize not .." "I realize really!". leave quickly.

Maybe they think I'm a fool, already hurt but still loving, already forgotten but I have not forgotten, even been betrayed but still faithful waiting. but yes want what else because that's what I feel, even I think if my life stay 1 day or 1 hour again or 1 minute then then I will be happy if he who accompany my last day.

I keep walking around a place that makes the most beautiful moments. yes that's just what I do every day, peel away the memories that have gone by without it without me going to the place where we are together. because basically there is no easy place tuk tuk forget.



The memories still ringing in my ears and a memory stuck in the corner of my brain made me smile for myself, remembering back then, dancing, laughing happy, joking laughter. but somehow as I recalled that everything had gone by like firewood that had become ashes and blown by the wind. strange my heart is so sick like a knife cut so sharp that it makes so many scratches while remembering it!

I was bowed limply then, the wind blows so cool it makes the heart more and more tortured to endure very pain. Strange my head suddenly dizzy, sick, hurt my head, kutengok left-right but somehow that day nobody passing by my place .. Brruuuaakkk ...

Blur, this world is so opaque when I open my eyes, I blink and wipe my eyes and open it slowly, it turns out there is a figure of the beautiful woman I found, the woman I had hoped for, the woman whom I had dreamed she told me. "I will always be in your heart, Always and forever". I woke up for the second time, strange, but what I felt was real that all is not a dream, I keep left-right but no woman who said that, where the woman just that is what is in my brain do not care about the situation in that place. "Qi, what about you? Qi ". just a question that was so panicky when I heard it, I recognized his voice, but somehow I could not say that was in my mind just the woman. Suddenly my body, whatever the doctor did to me, maybe he injected me with a tranquil injection. "Qi, are you okay?" The voice was so typical I heard, but I ignored the question. "Yan .. yani where Fik?" I asked in a voice that was so raucous. "Yani? no Yani here Qi, I was the one here "but I kept asking him that until he patted my cheeks hoping I stopped asking Yani, the woman who had gone, lost and forgot me from her life.

Whatever he is, I can not erase his name and memories in my memory. I'd love to fall in love again, but why is all that hard! even I always ask God why I just love Yani?
my life is ruined already, this is not because of him but because i am too loving and loving him. maybe God is testing my love for him.

Sitting and smiling as I was doing in my yard, contemplating myself as I watched a passing vehicle passing by the front gate of my house, I tried to get up, even though it was difficult but I had to get up, to get rid of his name and erase memory that might have been met by the cobwebs since no longer with him 2 years ago.

now I live with a million hopes, the most important hope is to not love him anymore, because I love him too much.
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