Life has a way of putting you in your place. Literally. Considering none of us can see into the future, we are left to do the best we can to plan a path to get where we want, and try the best we can to execute the plan. But, sometimes life has other plans. We fall into traps, we get side tracked, we hit road blocks and stumbling blocks fall on us. For as much as we are intelligent creatures, you would think we wouldn't allow ourselves to fall off the planned path! Some of us are just plain hopeless.
I like to think I follow a planned path as well as any other person. Yesterday though, I bobbled when I should've bubbled. I took a step that not only took me off my planned path, it slid me right into a gully the size of the Grand Canyon, missing the shoulder entirely, and landing me into a deep gully. I've no one to blame but myself, I accept the blame fully as my own too. But, I was doing what I felt was the right thing to do. I wont even allow myself to change my decision. It wasn't made lightly or half heartedly. It impacts and affects more than just a couple of people. It changes lives, and has the potential to change a life for the better by putting him on a path he never would imagine being on. It may turn my already hectic life into pure chaos. It's a huge risk on my part. It also opens me up to pain and hurt that I've experienced more than my fair share through life, open old wounds, and bring out old demons.
I don't care about the risks I could find myself having to deal with. I don't care about the cost of it, either mentally, physically, or financially. I'm not looking for anything back that could justify the reasons for sending me to the bottom of the gully. The only thing that matters is how the others being affected come out in the end. That the only reason for seeing it through, is having those I love and take this huge leap for, are given a gift so valuable, that its changes to lives are not taken for granted or wasted.
Why leave the well planned path for some risk that wont benefit me in the end? Because at the end of the day, when I lay my head on my pillow to sleep, I rest easy knowing I set the people up I love dearly on their own path to a huge success.
Yes, my life now is truly La Vida Loco. I've no one to blame but myself. But, the ideal that in the future those I'm doing this for are happy and healthy, is enough of a reason to let it be la vida loco for as long as it needs to be.
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