Mother

She was my mother
and I loved her.
She was tired but strong
Trying for so long.

I was five.
She was tired of being alive.
Barely holding on
Not knowing where she'd gone wrong.
The bottle was her saviour
but drastically changed her behavior.
She was my birth giver
and I didn't want to leave her.
She felt like a problem
Still wanting love from them.
She felt so alone
Every night she cried her silent tone.

She was broken and scared
It felt like no one cared.
She worked hard
But no one ever saw her good part.

I was five
when she decided to end her life.
She swallowed ever pill
Making sure they kill.
Enough is enough
She was tired of being tough.
She ended her sufferin'
She was tired of strugglin'
Depressed and sad
Emotions driving her mad.
Giving up all hope
Not knowing how to cope.

Sometimes I wonder,
head roaring like thunder.
What if things were different somehow?
Maybe she would have been here right now...

I miss something I never knew...
But I miss her.. wouldn't you?