Everyone sure desires a peaceful relationship or marriage, but how easy is it to achieve desires?.
Growing up, I've seen some couples walking while holding hands on the street, and even on Television, I've also seen really old couples, still kiss, hold hands, play like kids and lots more, though my parent are never like that, but I've always desired to have a really happy relationship with my partner, but like I initially asked is it easy to achieve this?.
With both my personal experience and that of some close people I know so far, I have come to a conclusion that, "NO" it isn't easy to achieve this, but if both partners are willing to work together against all odds, then it is achievable.
There have been several cases where two individuals who claim to be madly in love with each other, had the best of weddings, were even head over heels for the other, but turned out to have a failed marriage shortly after the wedding, and one may say, they didn't really love themselves, but sadly that isn't the case most times, it goes beyond just love.
Do not get me wrong, Love is a beautiful thing, and is a vital recipe for a successful marriage/relationship, but for it to be more efficient, some more vital ingredients are required, which are.
FRIENDSHIP :- Aside from being in love with your partner he/she should be your best friend, one you can pour your heart out to, one you can count on, and one you can trust. Bearing in mind that two cannot work together except they agree.
UNDERSTANDING :- This should be embedded with patience, and knowing no one is perfect but can only strive towards perfection
FORGIVENESS :- As Humans, mistakes are inevitable, and as much as you want to be forgiven, you must learn to forgive, never bring back or make reference to past quarrels or argument, but move on and let go of the wrongs, also bearing in mind that if you did something wrong that your partner complained about and forgives you, try to be concious of that mistake and not let it repeat itself again.
WILLINGNESS TO STAY :- This is also very necessary, for both partners as a couple, you must be willing to stay and work things out, no one said it would be easy, the determination to stay must come from both parties involved, and if for any slight/little mistake your partner makes, you begin to consider a break-up, then there's a problem.
Conclusion
The above listed isn't quite the case in an abusive affair, but a successful relationship/marriage is possible, but requires lots of efforts from both individuals in order to make it happen.
A true relationship is likened to as a tennis game, it can only be interesting if both parties are serving the ball from one side of the court to the other, imagine only a player in that game with a court for two, no matter how such player serves the ball to the other side of the court the ball never comes back.
So if you truly desire a good relationship, play your part right while your partner does same too.