Ted. You know I expect you to check your cell phone during a movie to make sure you have not missed the latest, greatest words of carolkean.
Believe it or not, I said something like this once to a guy who apologized for not replying sooner to a mundane email of mine - and he was traumatized, thinking I *meant it when I chastised him for not tending immediately to my every word. I even use emojis, to no avail. My own mother and sisters cannot tell when I'm kidding. I should take up slapstick and leave irony or dry "humor" to those who are better at employing it. That said... my kids used to be creeped out whenever they caught sight of a certain person with binoculars watching them on the trampoline or doing whatever in our own yard. We have a security camera now, but who wants to slog through hours of footage to see who cut down the tree in our yard on the Fourth of July and so on and so forth. (It was a common green ash. Now, the rare butternut tree I planted years ago- that would have hurt!)