As you all know, I like preparing our minds. Experiences shared and advice can never be too much as we got into this life without having a manual to guide us. We learn from other people’s experiences, personal experiences and the things we read too. We don’t have all the time in the world to make our own mistakes and learn from them and this is why we read, listen and learn from other people’s experiences.
Marriage is a lot of hard work. It is not for the faint hearted or those who just want to try things out. It is not for kids, but for matured minds and this has no bearing on age. A 30 year old can act more matured than a 40 year old. It sometimes boils down on exposure and personal development. Age doesn’t qualify anyone for marriage.
It is annoying when you ask people why they want to marry and they tell you; ”I feel I am of age to marry”. I don’t see where it has been written that once you clock 25 years of age, you are “ripe” for marriage. You might be cute but that doesn’t make you funny. You might take a vow, but that doesn’t mean you know how to love and you might be fluent in Latin language but that doesn’t mean you know how to speak. Just as fame doesn’t confer relevance, age doesn’t mean you are ready for marriage, but one thing I know is, marriage isn’t for kids.
Marriage will stretch you. It will also deny you so you will know you are no longer living for yourself but for your family. I recently came across someone who shared his thoughts. He said he saw a man at a store and he was checking the price tags and hoping to find an affordable shoe to buy. Every time he muttered under his breath; ”I can’t afford this” anytime he sees new shoe. Not long after, this man who witnessed this saw the same man in a popular shopping mall; Shoprite swiping his card to purchase goods; groceries and children items worth 170,000 naira (local currency) and reality dawned on him why the man has been saying he couldn’t afford those shoes. It wasn’t as if he doesn’t have the money to buy them, but priority sets him and he had to deny himself some basic things just to keep things going for his family; that is sacrifice. An immature person cannot do this.
…to be continued…
Thank you for your time.
My pen doesn’t bleed, it speaks, with speed and ease.
Still me,
My tongue is like the pen of a ready writer.
Olawalium; (Love’s chemical content, in human form). Take a dose today: doctor’s order.
I totally agree with you @community coin! Marriage is indeed a hard work! There's sacrifice accompanied by it. I am also married and I absolutely agree to what you mentioned that there are things which we postpone because we put the needs of our family first.
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I can remember my friend would always tell me that it's his happiness to see his wife happy. What I learned from him is this--Put the needs of your wife first!
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I know! Happy wife equals to happy life!!! as always man! LOL
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This calls for reflection
Truth is Marriage isn't a function of age
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Never a function of age, my brother. I was deeply touched when i read about that story too. He denied himself just to keep his family going. Selflessness and that is what marriage requires.
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@olawalium sir!
Although the government of different countries has fixed different age of marriage, but there is no mention of anywhere that marriage should not be married after this age. Age never gets interrupted for marriage. At any age when we feel that we need a life partner and we should physically and mentally get ourselves married, we should get married.Marriage does not mean that its purpose is to get children only. Marriage is a union of two souls, in which each other's feelings are attached. There is no reason to marry. Yes after the marriage, your responsibilities towards the society increases towards your family.You have given a good example of a shoe buyer in which the care of the family is given first priority instead of fulfill his basic needs.
Regards
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I am always enjoying your comments. Thanks a lot.
Yes, there is no fixed age for marriage. It is said that when you clock 18, you can take responsibility and do stuffs and as we have both established, marriage is a personal choice and it should be when you are ready. They don't mark register there so there is no need to rush. Every other condition must be met; being ready on all fronts. Thanks a lot, brother.
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I think marriage is about handling responsibility. If talking about my country....here we have two aspect of marriage or you may three aspect. Firstly the older generation, who alwsys think that marriage should be done as soon as they achieve the set maturity age like 18 years for girls and 21 years for boys. They are old tradition follower and think the early they get over with the responsibilty the better it.
Now comes the second generation. People who are more focus on building their career. Their comes the existence of matrimonial sites....in lersuit ti buildi g their career, many get pass the age of 30 or 35 and by then they hardly get any good partner for life. When they realise they need to work upin their lives too they start to look out for the girls on matrimonial sites to get a match who keep them company for rest of the lives...even in that case they will look for working partner..so that they help each other.....now the third generation..thoigh i do kot want to include at first. But its good to talk about them too....these are the budding exhuberence of youth. Who easily get confused over love and infatuation and decide to marry each other so that they live together...but hardly such marriage survive for long.....hipe you understand what i mean....steem on
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Marriage required tutor before jumping into
Marriage required maturity before trying it
Marriage require seeking advice(s) from the experienced ones
Marriage required a lot
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Dear olawalium,i Agree, in marriage age doesn't matter, the thing which matters is maturity and sincerity.On the other hand, the priority matters, no doubt that he have the ability to buy those shoes but he has some priorities,he knows that it's not necessary to buy expensive shoes. Infact, believe me, he is a wise man.
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Excellent post and very true. Much like my marriage, all the difficulties and pain led to fruit I had no idea could be so good. My marriage is so much stronger having gone through the trials. Great article.
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I generally agree, this is how it should be. Sometimes adversity tears a couple apart.
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Agree! Struggles and relational hiccups can get some to throw in the towel or become resentful. Some spouses are simple quitters.
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In today's society people want value and others want to provide value but without the effort it requires to to do so and the importance you must have in the other person's well being. Marriage is hard work, that's why my wife and I craft a yearly vision enhance our original vision in order to grow strong in our marriage and family.
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