Fuck It, before it fucks you #121 (Early in the mornin'. Risin' to the street)

in microchips •  3 years ago  (edited)

What’s up internet fam? It’s Thursday morning on the west coast, and a little further into the morning than I’d like it to be I have to say. Either way it’s time for me to write a blog. This is another night when I didn’t really know what to write about but I just went ahead and wrote some shit anyway. Maybe it will work out? Guess we’ll just have to see what happens I suppose.

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So I think it was a blog or two ago that I said that you’d eventually be able to get virus killing nanobots injected into your blood. Well, it wasn’t long after that that I saw an article about microchips that will be able to filter viruses out of your blood. Unfortunately I neglected to actually read the article and now I can’t find it. I don’t even know what to google for honestly. So my source is “Dude, trust me.” Still, I don’t think it’s that far fetched of a concept. That’s why I tell anti-vaxxers that it’s stupid to think there’s a microchip in the vaccines. If they want to put microchips into people, they can get most of them to accept one voluntarily at this point. Shit, if this theoretical microchip comes on the market people are probably going to be fighting to get one. And I’m sure the authoritarian types will want the government to require them and issue them to everyone. But this is America damnit! We prefer to let the market violate our rights here! So all of the businesses will require you to have one to work there instead. They will be expensive of course, but you’ll be able to pay for it in installments, with interest, and have the payments deducted from your paycheck. Which is probably the better option because if you miss a patent they’ll turn it off, and you’ll have to rely on your weakened and sluggish immune system to keep you safe. Of course you can’t go back to your job if your chip isn’t working, and you won’t be able to get a new job. So you’ll be jolly well fucked. But I don’t know. That’s just one thought I had. I don;t know shit about microchips. I’m just a guy who talks shit on the internet so don’t listen to me. Would certainly make for a good sci fi show at least.
That’s a pretty good cover to say just about anything though. I feel like I can say whatever I want as long as I admit I don’t know what the fuck I’m talking about. I could probably be like “Dude, it’s totally safe for you to jump off of a skyscraper. But I don’t know what the fuck I’m talking about.” And I know what you’re thinking. You’re thinking you might say “Well why don’t you jump off of one if you’re so sure. Motherfucker, I said it was safe for YOU to jump off of a skyscraper. If I jump off of one I know I’ll die. But if you jump off of a skyscraper, I’ll be fine. So I can only assume you will be too. Now with all that being said, you really shouldn’t jump off of a skyscraper. You’ll probably fuck it up and then your family will sue me. Assholes.
So I have this job. And at this job there’s a break room with a big screen tv on the wall. Actually I don’t know what constitutes a “Big screen” these days, but I suppose that doesn’t matter. The other night I just happened to see Star Wars Episode III. And it’s really creepy how much Emperor Palpatine reminds me of Biden. I mean like after he’s disfigured though. I don’t know, maybe it’s just me. And as we already discussed, I don’t know what the fuck I’m talking about. All I’m really qualified to say is Fuck it, before it fucks you.

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