How to Deal with Betrayal and the Feeling of Being Cheated? Part #1

in mindset •  6 years ago 

Hi, Steemians!

In the first part of Divine Comedy, Dante states that betrayal is the greatest wrongdoing that any man can commit in their lifetime.

Inferno, as it were, is described with a certain hierarchical system in which every sin and reprehensible action or behavior is categorized.

In the abysmal end of that inferno is betrayal, and the most horrid folly ever conceived by mankind.

Often times in life, we may feel betrayed or cheated. Sometimes, betrayal lunges at you with a ferocious strike, leaving you defenseless and hurt.

How can we deal with betrayal?


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There are many things that can destroy a man’s spirit in this life. Some of you may wonder how this is related to our usual motivational content.

Well, to answer that question, you need to understand that a person cannot be productive or visionary if they are psychologically hurt.

In the world of business or even personal relationships, betrayal is a common mischief.

People tend to think that they can get hold of something better, and in the process of getting that better thing, they trample on the right of others.

Many of us may be unprepared for such behavior. You should never bring a knife to a gunfight, but if you do, how should you deal with the aftermath?


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This aftermath has many faces. A lot of people fall into the grips of depression and lose touch of who they are as a person.

A lot of people tend to overthink their whole relation with the person who has betrayed them. Where did it go wrong? Was it my fault? How could I have prevented this?

It may be difficult to be able to trust other people when you feel betrayed.

But here is a truth: You should not let the wrongdoing of other people determine who you are as a person.


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Meaning, when someone does something bad to you and does it behind your back, you should not pressure yourself into changing your personality to better suit the current landscape of society.

A lot of people taste the bitterness of betrayal and change as a person, becoming cruel themselves and inflicting cruelty unto other people because they have been wronged.

But if you feed this cycle of greed and viciousness, you will do nothing but help the ethical system take a wrong step at every turn, ultimately dooming a society to live the rest of its day in madness and chaos.


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It is okay to feel bad or broken after you have been betrayed. There are few feelings as terrible as feeling like someone has taken advantage of your kindness and honesty.

But do not fall into despair. Not everyone you meet in life is going to be as vicious. So, have hope for a brighter future in which trust can be the cornerstone of your relationships.

For now, remember this: Whatever that doesn’t kill you makes you stronger!

A BIG HUG!

@chbartist

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Greetings @chbartist

When we have experienced betrayals, we must evaluate what we are doing that attracts this type of situation towards us.

If we are in an environment where there are people who in some way will be benefited by betraying our trust, it is most likely that this will happen.

We must develop in balanced environments; where the environment does not have the need to do something against us, is a way to avoid disappointment

Words of wisdom here!

Yes, it is true that when a person is backstabbed or betrayed, they should not change their personality to cope with the environment but let the surroundings and the karma to do their things.

Sometime betrayal can be a little bit difficult and easy to roll over but I believe the best option is just to walk away from it because the more we subject ourselves to the betrayal feelings, the more it destroy us

It is very difficult to manage our integrity, attitude when you get cheated by someone, many change themselves and becomes a completely different personality . Our planet consists of good and bad persons but point is don’t let a incident to change yourself. It is very hard but we should not let feeling of betrayal come in our mind.
Thanks @chbartist

Saludos @chbartist cada uno de nosotros debe ir aprendiendo algunos temas de una forma dolorosa ya que no hay forma de que te las expliquen y que los entendamos, lo que si podemos entender es que hacer después que ocurre y el dolor que sentimos nos hace más fuertes, al superarlo nos hacemos más inteligentes, como pasa en los negocios (ya que usaste el tema) hay traición, desilusión, pero debes aprender a vivir a diario con eso, dándote experiencia y habilidades, es decir, si aprendes de todo esto, no te frustras sino que te haces sabio.

Betrayal is definitely a difficult thing to deal with, and yet it is almost impossible for someone to walk through life without being betrayed, multiple times.

The really difficult depressive state to snap out of comes when you find yourself on the receiving end of a series of betrayals by different people and you start thinking that it must be you that are doing something "wrong* and are actively attracting people who will betray you; being the "sucker" or "the gullible one" or simply not having a ""suspicious enough" nature.

And sometimes it is you... in the sense that perhaps you grew up in a difficult family so the underlying psychological dynamic that goes with betrayal feels *familiar,"... not "right" by any means, but familiar, and we often choose things we are familiar with because untested territory is a little frightening.

Thank you for another thoughtful post!

=^..^=

We can also learn from these experiences to become less vulnerable from mistakes of trust or reliance on another. We often forget of our own capabilities to forge forward and meet our goals with our networks.

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Hi chbartist betrayal is painful thing for those who trust one but anothe deceive other one that's very painful. And destroy trust in socity thosw people.

good collection of post for the topic of betrayal & deceive

yeh betrayal deling destroy us good words and advice for betrayal andg cheeting nice words. Some time we face deficulty to face cheating that's harmful thing

Betrayal destroy trust, and its so painful because its come from people that are close to your heart. One must go through it and learn from it. In the end, the most powerful tool to deal with it is forgiveness. I must say, forgive but never forget!.

  ·  6 years ago Reveal Comment

Hola @chbartist excelente análisis, para enfocar mejor este tipo de situación, ya que la traición es una elección, de quien la ejecuta, y la mayoría de nosotros, la ve como un error de nosotros, lo que nos lleva actuar como lo describes; permitiendo que las malas acciones de otras personas determinen quienes somos… ¡Gracias!... Feliz Noche.

Hello @chbartist you give good content and always reply your followers. That is why I following you. Good luck.

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You are good created because you reply all your followers. Good

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One will always feel bad and disappointed. But like I always say, thank God I know who my enemies are.
Don't bother feeling sorry for yourself because it doesn't make the feeling of being betrayed any better. So just move past it and carry on with your life. At least, now you know better.
Cheers

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Me also face these things but yor advices groom us to become strong

@chbartist Hi again, the feeling of getting cheated is worse and something we all have gone through... Agreed with your each and every word keep it up... =)

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Very nice article brother.
In my opinion, we only get betrayed by those we trust the most. Others have no authority to betray us nor do we allow them to do so.
And btw Waiting for the part 2

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Thank you, just like the quote goes, an eye for an eye will make the whole world blind.

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Good advice how can i dill thanks for sharing.

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I hate hearing the cliche' saying, "What doesn't kill you, makes you stronger."

I say, "What doesn't kill you, can leave you maimed, disabled, and broken - for the remainder of your natural life."

Of course, I've got a dark sense of humor - due to a DEVASTATING betrayal earlier in my life. I completely failed at dealing with it - and it did cause me to go insane, quite literally. I was 19 at the time. I wish I'd been equipped with some better emotional tools at that time in my life but, alas, I was a fool. Many were hurt by my subsequent insanity, and I spent over 13 years locked up in a mental hospital. The judicial supervision continues to this day - over 25 years later (with no end in sight)!!!

I must say that the early betrayal in my life destroyed me, and destroyed the "arc" of my life in many very real, incomprehensible ways. I was/am a changed person from these experiences. Not only do I not trust people, I still expect them to let me down. It's a defense mechanism: if I don't expect anything or get my hopes up, I won't be let down again. It does protect me but, I do love others much more loosely. It's difficult to describe this to others, if they haven't been through it - but total betrayal from "the love of your life" is simply a very difficult experience to survive through. I nearly didn't.

Thanks for sharing this topic. Followed.

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  ·  6 years ago Reveal Comment