ENG-3. We are living people, we have feelings.

in mindset •  6 years ago 

Even if your love does not save the whole world - at least you can influence the fate of a particular person

The majority of modern literature aimed at the development of personality, as a frequent cause of inactivity calls being in a comfort zone. It is implied that comfort zone is a certain habitual set of life rules, actions and conditions that supports the current state of an individual. And, in fact, such a definition really takes place.

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In an attempt to avoid change (which we often associate with stress), we subconsciously try to keep as much as possible of our usual factors. To illustrate this situation, take the need to do something with its own weight. For example, reduce it.

Analyzing this situation, we can meet 2 different vectors. The first is a set of customary arguments in favor of the fact that everything suits us (and, indeed, they can be 100% sincere). At this point in time, we may not experience any physical inconvenience, no discomfort or psychological pressure, no complexes about the current weight. For us comfortable, really comfortable current state.

Even if the need for change is dictated by medical records. Backed by logical arguments and implies certain positive effects after the changes and negative in the absence of them. Therefore, on the one hand, physiologically, we state the unnecessary weight that needs to be removed. On the other hand, psychologically, everything suits us. We do not experience any inconvenience, we are in a quiet familiar comfort zone.

Fix this moment and consider a parallel example.

The opposite situation. We have excess weight and we experience tremendous discomfort. We complex about appearance, we are annoyed by many physical discomforts. Some people even literally suffer, are depressed, deny society. But - idle ...

And with all the desire and respect for business gurus and lecturers for personal motivation, we cannot call this state a comfort zone. No, on the contrary, it is a hellish state of the discomfort zone. This set of habits and factors simply puts pressure on us, depresses us, brings us both physical and psychological inconveniences. This is far from what we would like.

The need for change is dictated by a whole complex of external manifestations and inner experiences. The logic of potential improvements is undeniable. The absence of change, on the contrary, guarantees us continued suffering.

But you know what? In both cases, we can observe inaction.

A person may be adequate, not be an enemy of his own body and life - but never start to follow the recommendations of the doctor. Contrary to logic, he, like millions of other people, may never leave the comfort zone to make the necessary changes.

And likewise, a person can be aware of all the current inconveniences, experience tremendous experiences and mental anguish. However, also ignoring the logically correct chain of actions, remain in the zone of discomfort.

And here it becomes quite obvious that if we do not see the necessary changes in some person, if we notice his inaction and the usual state - we cannot say that he is in order and that he is satisfied with everything.

We should not focus on the stagnation in the development of this person, should not poke a finger, call him lazy and other offensive definitions.

On the contrary, if we are not indifferent to this person, if we notice his suffering or understand the consequences to which his inaction may lead, we must show attention and sympathy.

Many of us have already lived a fairly decent stretch of life and have some experience in ordinary everyday psychology, which means they know how a minimal action or even a word can lead to enormous changes.

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A simple conversation and a statement that a person should lose weight, because you do not want to lose it (the doctor made it clear what happens if he does not lose weight) - can move things for the better. Another reminder that you love a person and would be happy for his changes can work wonders.

And likewise, your minimal participation in supporting someone who is complexing and experiencing, but does not dare to act - may also affect the further development of events. A good phrase, the assertion that a person is not alone, can inspire him to take the first step and interrupt his inaction.

In what zone - comfort or, on the contrary, personality is discomfort - it does not matter. In both cases, logic is not always sufficient, and pressure and harsh statements in the context of motivational literature are not always appropriate.

We are living people, we have feelings. And therefore even the most large-scale theory based on solid facts can be broken about a tiny particle of love.

Change is the way of creation. Therefore, help, and do not force to change. And if your love does not save the whole world, then at least you will be able to completely influence the fate of a particular person.

P.S .: If you are still with me - please vote for this post, subscribe to my account and be happy!

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