In this sense, immature refers to emotional maturity, not adult growth. What is emotional immaturity and why is it important?
These traits might not necessarily make us emotionally immature. The following are guidelines without diagnostic value. Also, emotional immaturity can alter with growth. Many people are at different stages of maturity.
An emotionally immature person acts childishly for their age. It may influence you if these 5 indications are present.
Various behaviours fit into this category. Immature people avoid deep conversations. They get uncomfortable when their emotions, past mistakes, or introspection are highlighted.
They hide everything that causes emotional distress rather than work on it. This category also includes immature people's failure to take responsibility for their acts, struggle to admit their mistakes and instead blaming others (Heitler, 2016).
Dr. Susan Heitler would have noted that egocentrism and narcissism often accompany emotional immaturity. Adults with emotional immaturity may want attention like children. These people struggle to see beyond their own demands and rewards (Heitler 2016). Even when presented with a viable option, they are fixated on what is best for them, making it difficult to see outside themselves.
Children and emotionally immature adults often have tantrums and lose their anger (Heitler 2016). For instance, when they feel uncomfortable listening to others, they provide their opinion without thinking (Heiter 2016). No analysis is done other than finding evidence to support their claim. The discussion is divided between good and evil, with no meaningful endeavour to restore “peace” and go forward (Heitler 2016).
Emotionally immature people often act defensively. When presented with a crisis, they can readily deny responsibility, rigorously explain their every move, and lie about their involvement or culpability for an event to annoy and intimidate the other person (Lamothe 2020). It's crucial to distinguish between trying to convey your position in an argument and defending oneself to be right at all costs and escape blame.
Option 2 features emotionally immature behaviour. Defensiveness may also conceal emotional manipulation (Gibson, 2019). If you're dating an emotionally immature person, you may be frequently asked to breach your privacy. Trying to maintain these spaces by emotional manipulation causes shame, guilt, and worthlessness. These situations require emphasising that preserving spaces and boundaries is your right and does not make you bad.
Dependent relationships help emotionally immature people feel safe. They dislike being alone because it pushes them to confront their feelings. Being with people helps them avoid repressing emotional pain. Emotional maturity is needed to feel and think deeply.
Reflecting on our mental and emotional states helps us understand ourselves. People learn and grow this way. Because understanding how they think and feel emotions might be scary, emotionally immature people choose to "sweep the dust under the rug."