We have a tendency to be more critical of ourselves than we are of other people. However, do we have too much. With only a few questions, you can determine whether or not you are being kind to yourself.
Many times, we have a tendency to be more critical of ourselves than we are of other people. For instance, we can be difficult to approach when it comes to our own errors, but we are also willing to acknowledge that other people might not be perfect.
In a similar manner, our shortcomings, including our failures, our abandonments, our clumsiness, and all of our defects, appear to us to be more unacceptable than those encountered by other people.
In spite of the fact that it is natural for us to avoid indulging ourselves, it is essential for our health that we treat ourselves with compassion and care by giving up on our pursuit of perfection. On occasion, however, we are not even conscious of the gravity of our situation.
One of the questions that psychologist Julie Smith posed to herself on her Instagram account was as follows: if you were to communicate with your friends in the same manner that you communicate with yourself, would they continue to be your friends?
"The bad news is that if your internal narrative sounds more like a stalker than a friend, it will have negative consequences for your well-being," says Julie Smith. "This is the bad news."
The good news is that you have more power to change things than you believe you have or believe you have. It is not too late to engage in self-compassion practices, and doing so may be absolutely necessary.
"Because we have a tendency to have higher expectations of ourselves, it can be difficult to demonstrate self-compassion – even when showing compassion to others," acknowledges psychotherapist Elizabeth Fedrick in an interview with PsychCentral.
This is not always the case, despite the fact that there are widespread attitudes that encourage us to assume that self-criticism is the most effective catalyst for achievement. Higher levels of self-compassion have been linked to greater feelings of enjoyment, optimism, curiosity, and connectivity, as well as decreased levels of anxiety, sadness, rumination, and fear of failure, according to a study that was conducted in 2009.
In order to become a little more our own friend, Julie Smith suggests that we ask ourselves the following three questions at regular intervals:
I would like to know what my actions and behaviour would be like if I were to treat myself in the same manner that I treat the individuals who are important to me personally.
What kind of implications would this have on the way I understand my own shortcomings and shortcomings?
What kind of effects would this have on the way I interact with other people?
To find the answers to these questions, you should first make an effort to identify the ways in which your behaviours and thought patterns could be altered, and then progressively work towards becoming your own buddy.