Lastbullet - Jupiter (bonus track)

in music •  7 years ago 


https://steemit.com/jupiter/@lastbullet/the-story-behind-the-songs-jupiter

"Jupiter" is the concept behind the name of the EP and the bonus track, which was actually recorded before the rest of the songs as some kind of "single" (if that makes sense anymore). Hence the different line-up and recording credits etc.

So why "Jupiter"? Well, it's a bit of a long story.

Basically it all starts about a question that keeps repeating inside my head: why can the heart sometimes be SO wrong? So after several bad experiences of falling in love with someone who you think is "THE ONE" just to realize that they never felt the same in return, you start to notice: hmmm maybe there's something "wrong" here.

So for years the question keeps bouncing inside your head and you feel trapped because the same thing keeps happening and you have no control. But as time goes by you learn how your mind works and you know it will find an answer eventually, while that question keeps asking in the background.

But what does all this have to do with Jupiter? Well, she used to live in my hometown, she was a student so she was there temporarily. When she graduated, she went back home (a town in the shoreline). I said goodbye to her and I thought I was going to be okay, but immediately after she left I felt some horrible emptiness. The same places were meaningless, everything felt desolated without her.

Then I "wrote" the song, or the song actually wrote myself: the tune and the lyrics just appeared in my head. It was the soundtrack of what I was feeling. All I had to do is translate it into guitar. I guess that's what they call "inspiration" or "muse": often you feel like you're just a channel. The art is already there, somewhere in some kind of another dimension, and your job as an "artist" is just to catch them and bring them into this world, like a "fisherman".

At first the name was not "Jupiter". It was the summertime. One of my best friends got married in a town in the North. At night I was completely drunk and then I missed her again and sent her a text message: "I hope you're ok, all the best blah blah, from the North to the Sea". Then she replied: "...and from the Sea to Jupiter".

At that time I didn't understand. I became obsessed with her, probably because I couldn't understand her. She didn't reply to my messages. It took me years to get rid of her "memory", despite nothing ever happened between us. It was all inside my head.

It was one of those times when you fall at first sight. I thought I knew her, I thought she was like this or like that, even if I had never spoken to her.

This made me feel so good. I was happier, more confident, I thought I found a significant other. Life had a different meaning. Everything was worth more. Well, falling in love, you know.

But when you look at it from some distance, you realize those are very similar reactions to the ones that drugs create on you. Love (especially in this one-way and imagined version) is like an altered state of consciousness. You laugh like an idiot, you do stupid things. But then there's a hangover too...

So I realized I had become addicted to that feeling. I thought I needed her, but for god's sake, I didn't even know her! What I needed was just that feeling of being in love with her. I was a junkee. Aren't we all, in a way?

Years later, I managed to forget her, but I kept asking myself why can the heart be SO wrong. She turned to be a lesbian, actually. So it was a tough lesson, but one I'll never forget: the heart can lie too.

I bumped into some articles on social media about the way love works. So basically there's this hormones and neurotransmitters in your brain (dopamine, etc) which make you feel good when you fall in love. They're actually the same ones which get triggered by drugs. So love works in a very similar way to drugs: it makes you feel good for a while, but it will destroy you if you don't keep some distance.

Ok, but why Jupiter, once again. Then I came across some other articles about Jupiter which grabbed my attention. It's a massive heavenly body, which looks like a star from earth, but it's mostly gas. It looks huge, but it's empty. Just like that kind of love, sometimes.

It's the biggest planet in the solar system, and the first one to appear. The name comes from "dieus pater", the father of the gods. God. And God is love.

Being such a massive planet, its gravity pull is huge as well. A strong attraction that some can't avoid. Once again the same mechanics. But where is it pulling you to? To a suffocating atmosphere of ammonia and colossal storms and hurricanes. If you managed to survive this, you would die crushed against the surface due to the pull itself.

So it is indeed a beautiful thing, when seen from afar. But if you try to get too close, it will kill you.

I guess that's also the metaphor behind the tale of Ulysses and the sirens. Beautiful creatures who sing, trying to attract you. But if you follow the music, they will devour you. So you have two options: you can put some wax on your ears or tie yourself, if you want to listen.

I wrote a book as well about all this. It's in spanish though. If anyone's interested, just google "Carlos Ribera Jupiter".

So somehow I managed to exorcise my demons by taking them out of me in the shape of music or words. And I feel more balanced now and in control, but I know the "enemy" is powerful...


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