Relationship advice needed, what would you do if it was you?
Last week, on my way home I stopped by an eatery to grab some snacks. As I was about to leave, I turned and my eyes collided with my bestfriend's(girl) fiance. The idiot was having a romantic dinner with another girl. We both saw each other, so no need for pretence. I greeted him and he responded.
On my way out of the eatery, while wondering how I will position my mouth to tell my bestie that the man he is about to marry is a dog. The guy ran after me.
"Please don't tell blossom what you just saw, please, it was the devil's handiwork, it's not what you are thinking, I can explain..." He kept on begging.
As a good friend, I am meant to tell her but hell no, I know the countless amount of heartbreaks she passed through, before falling for this dude and she is so sure he is the right guy for her.
I just don't want to be the one to spoil her joy, Less I forget, their wedding is in less than a month time... Just imagine the plans, wedding invitations and the rest.
I just can't be the person to spoil all that... Its easier to pretend like it never happened.
I am really confused at the moment.
What would you do, if you were in my shoes? will you mind your business like I am doing or open up, even as you know it might lead to immediate termination of the wedding to be?
The first thing I would suggest is removing the idea that you have a right or wrong choice in this situation. If you feel like your friend needs to know what you saw then you should relay the information. Ultimately what happens isn't up to you in this situation. People decide to work things out or break them off for their own reasons and you don't need to feel responsible for that. I suggest not relaying the information with any bias and simply stating what you saw if you choose to go that route.
If you are feeling any sort of guilt for not saying anything, then it's probably your own way of telling yourself that keeping quiet isn't an option and repressing that emotion could lead to bigger issues in the future. I understand that you don't want to cause your friend pain by explaining what happened, but you aren't the one that did anything wrong here. If you are content with not saying anything, then you should be content with the fact that it could come out later and your friend may feel that you should have told them what you saw at the time to prevent the marriage. In the end, just do what you feel is right and you can't really have regrets about that as you have to live your own life in a way that you are comfortable doing.
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I have a female friend that i do see her fiance with another lady coming for a date at a hotel kissing each other while going inside close to the apartment where i live,i do get heart-broken whenever i see the dude with another lady but i just wanted to mind my business because my female friend is so much in love with the guy and they already fixed a date for marriage,i tried to mind my business but i kept feeling disturbed so i told my female friend about what happened and guess what?she never believed me infact she got very angry with me that i could even believe her fiance is cheating on her,she cut all ties with me,i was pained and felt regrets for being honest with her and telling her the truth about her man,few months later they got married then after a while my friend found out the truth that the guy is married to another lady with kids secretly,my friend found out and the marriage ended,she later came to apologise but it was too late because i already lost interest in my friendship with her after what she did...the bottom line is you should tell your friend what is happening,whether she believes you or not is her own cup of tea
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In my opinion if you are sure about what you saw then you should tell your friend... If you think you shouldn't say anything because it might ruin her marriage then think about this if your friend suffers in any way and becomes un happy with her marriage you would know about it any way.. and then you will tell youself that you could have done something... from experience I am saying that marriages are very hard to recover from if a couple gets seperated.. So ask you conscious and think what would be best for your friend aand then act accordingly..
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Tell the Guy that it does not matter as your friend was drinking coffee with her Ex a day ago. Atleast he will know what it feels like to be cheated upon. And keep bugging your friend to have a tight grip on this guy. Dont tell her directly but make her more cautious.
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This is an interesting thing to answer. When I see my spouse dating someone else, I will try to follow where they are going and what they will do. Then I will try to meet my partner, and try to talk. I will be honest that I see him dating someone else. I will ask for a decision from him, is still willing to maintain a relationship with me or choose an affair. I am ready with all the consequences. Even if he still wants to establish a relationship with me, not necessarily I want to deal with him again.
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I would go tell my best friend because I cannot sit and watch as my best friend gets married to a liar, a cheater! Her whole life will be a lie and that is huge. If my fiance had done a thing like that I would want to know.
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The Good @inuke
You should tell her. She is your friend and you care about her. But hear him out first. Let him explain himself before you go to her. Once should make absolutely 100% sure before making any call on such decisions. After all, it is a matter of concerning two people who are bound to get married. He may lie and tell some bullsh*t story just don't fall for that. Either way, this has to be reported to your friend.
The Bad @inuke
It has been 9 days since the question is raised mostly you probably had taken a decision and my opinion doesn't matter.
The ugly @inuke
Well, you should tell her. Not because that is the right thing to do or because if he is this way before marriage, Imagine how he is going to be after marriage. But purely for the sake of ass-kicking. Imagine yourself and your friend ganging up and laying a beating on that guy (who deserves every single flower pot to be throwned at his).
All we are saying is that tell her It is the right thing to do...
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