The Birds I Hate

in nature •  7 years ago  (edited)

This post was co-published at talanhorne.com.

Everybody loves chickens.

You love chickens. I love chickens. The whole world loves chickens.

And it isn't hard to see why. Chickens are small. Chickens are (mostly) gentle. And even if you have zero experience with livestock, you can spend an afternoon in the company of chickens without a lot of headaches. They're fun to watch and interact with. Apart from that, they also provide delicious meat and nutritious eggs.

Many people actually keep chickens, even in urban areas (local laws permitting). They make good hobby animals and can coexist with a variety of other pets.

Likewise, ducks are universally beloved.

They're adorably awkward. They're non-agressive. And the way they shake their little tails is just too precious. Ducks are therapeutic, which is why so many people feed them during a leisurely visit to the park.

I will never hate ducks, no matter how my life turns out.

And I am particularly fond of Hummingbirds. But then, who isn't?

Hummingbirds are so celebrated that there are bird feeders specifically designed to cater to them. And these feeders are often more popular than the traditional seed dispensers used for other birds.

The bright and shimmering plumage of male hummingbirds make them look like little flying brooches, and who wouldn't want to be visited by one of those?

Yes, there are many kinds of birds that we all love. Some are loved for their beauty, others for their usefulness. On the whole, birds are wonderful.

Oh, but there is more to this story. Among the rainbow of birds in this world, we find a few that are not so innocent. Some have earned the fear of many species, as talented and voracious predators. Others are a nuisance---as much a pest as any rodent. And some are simply detestable.

For today's post, I will reveal those among the Avian Class that have won my hatred, and memorialize that feeling here. It's not one of my usual topics, sure, but it needs to be said, because some crimes simply can't go unmentioned.

Owls


I resent the fact that owls present themselves as the wisest of all birds, knowing that particular honor could go to a number of other worthy contenders: ravens, crows, and African Grey Parrots, to name a few.

But, in some ways, it's appropriate for owls to be depicted---in a cartoonish fashion---as curiosities perched in a magician's study, surrounded by books.

This kind of image suggests, in its own misguided way, the owl's true nature as an eldritch creature of arcane prowess. Owls are primal killers invested with perverse talents. When a creature can suddenly change the number of toes it has, or turn its head entirely around on its neck, something seriously wrong is going on.

In nature, owls are apex predators. They fear nothing, but are feared by all.

The above footage was taken in Israel, and reveals an owl hunting eagles for food. The eagle that gets carried away can be safely presumed as eaten. Owls are horrifying.

And yet, I don't hate them.

Owls are killers, but only in the same way that nature itself is a killer. All their violence is done in the name of survival. Nothing about it is mean or cruel. It's just the food chain.

This is an important sticking point. All the birds that follow are worse than owls precisely because they do not share the owl's unfortunate necessity. From here on out, I list only birds that are unsympathetic.

Geese


Geese are monsters.

They present themselves as cousins to the much more beloved ducks, even going so far as to hide among these friendlier waterfowl. But make no mistake: they are vicious and wicked.

It is said that the dark lord Morgoth first created geese from captured ducks he locked in the deepest cells in the pits of Angband. There they were tortured and mutilated into the forms they assume today.

But they cannot hide their true nature for long. When a goose approaches, it is looking for a fight. Not content to simply wait for you to drop bread in front of them, they will try to take the whole loaf from you, even attacking should you give them an opening.

Children, in particular, can fall victim to a goose's brutality. They will peck, slap, and even ram young children, often without provocation.

They're only redeeming quality is the softness of their down, and that is gathered at great peril by anyone bold enough to reach under their wings.

I hate geese, and I wish for their destruction.

But there is one bird I hate even more.

Pigeons


Flying filth. Feathered rat. Eleventh plague of Egypt.


"I'll always be watching."


Call them what you will, they are the most detestable of all birds. They are unsanitary in the extreme, and they are often forced to confine themselves to rooftops and parapets, as there is no earthbound species that will suffer their presence.

And you can always tell when they are near. Unlike other birds that only chirp when communicating, a pigeon's asthmatic rasping sounds with every breath. You'll be sitting on your couch, minding your own business, and you'll hear one wheezing at your window, staring at you.

They only thing they give to the world is their excrement. And that piles up in the most inconvenient of places. In particular, they love to defecate on ancient houses of worship, in contempt of all that is good and holy.

As carriers of lice and worms, pigeons are a danger to other birds. They live as parasites on human society and breed like flies.

I hate pigeons. I hate them enough to wish that genetic engineers would invent the one creature that can eradicate them: the cat snake.

Apparently, I am not the only one, as a simple Google search of "Cat Snake" brought up several relevant images.

Imagine a future where a pigeon's last moments include seeing a cat's jaws unhinge, and a bottomless throat open up to consume them. Maybe I shall see it happen in my day. If not, then I must content myself with hating pigeons (particularly the ones that hang out on my balcony; seriously, I cannot even step outside anymore).

It's Your Turn


Those are the birds I hate. Do you agree with my assessment? Did I neglect to mention any detestable species of birds?

If so, then please leave a comment detailing which birds are the most odious, and I will be sure to avoid them in the future.

Until they manage to invent cat snakes, that is.

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the chicken provides a good source of food both with the eggs and their meat, it is very good to have a chicken and chicken farm to take advantage of it.

Wow....another wonderful and interesting ideas by @talanhorne sir....
Smart and uncommon ideas...
Wel done and perfect work sir...
I'm really like and respect ur ideas...
Cheers~~~

@talanhorne,
I assure you I have never seen Goose mouth before! This is scary and much more scary than Shark's mouth! Yeah feeling like I have seen a monster there :D Great article from you again bro!

Cheers~

chicken very much ,,, and very healthy

Congratulations @talanhorne
Now you are in the MinnowsPower Loyalty Member List...!!!

Exceptional good writing & outstanding figures you highlighted about these creatures...!!!

100% Upvoted by @MinnowsPower

Totally agree with you, my friend and your assessments of each bird have their reasons. Take for example pigeons, from them some problems with their droppings which can be found in all places and no good, but chickens, this is another matter and there are many pluses for a person! Thank you @talanhorne

You're a good knowledge person about writing and it's very difficult.
Your job is excellent Blog.
Thanks @talanhorne
Have a nice day

Wow... your bird’s collection is really amazing....ducks are so cute and innocent..and birds gif is amazing...I am quite surprised to see the Cat snake ... thanks for sharing the amazing gift of nature ....

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I love to follow naturalize things indeed birds, animals, trees etc... These birds like as roosters,owls, geece and Pigeons valuable information giving @talanhorne.

@talanhorne, Such a valuable gift giving today to us by you. Nice words of birds and finally shared crazy animations. Made me laugh much. Thanks to inspiration.

Lol, this was an amazing post about all kinds of beautiful birds. I love Hummingbirds, especially when they dance in front of their loved once. The video of owl 🦉 is unbelievable. This small eagle didn’t expect it at all. Honestly, I have no love for pigeons either, especially when I have to wash our backyard every week after what they leave there.

Very informative writting @talanhorne.
I also love chicken and its my favorite.
Cat gif really funny.@talanhorne
#upvote and #resteem done

I loves chickens.Wonderful writting @talanhorne
very funny.Thanks for sharing.
100% upvote and resteem done

About chickens like you rightly said, everyone loves them.
I love them too, but for the sweetness of their delicacy though, i dont care if they're gentle or not. Oh am so mean!! Lol
Well, you forgot the vulture because am sure you must truly hate the bird.
I hate its bald nature and generally everything about that filthy carcass eater.

hai @ talanhorne. i also hate some birds. i hate them because i am afraid. they hurt me like eagles, owls, crows, they are frightening to me. i love tetspi animal lovers not on those three birds. i am also afraid there is a snake. seldom bites me. says is very menyarsnkan ands @ talanhorne to be careful against snakes. because they have a lethal fluid.sukss for you @ talanhorne

Hopefully the love of animals remains good, because it is fitting for our fellow creatures to love each otherhopefully the love of animals remains good, because it is fitting for our fellow creatures to love each other

  ·  7 years ago (edited)

I hate pigeons. I hate them enough to wish that genetic engineers would invent the one creature that can eradicate them: the cat snake.

Agree! I love the catsnake. Never would have imagined this one. You must have a great imaginary skill. Owls are an amazing hunters with exceptional night vision. Look at this video, it’s amazing to watch. I like be chicken 🍗 on my plate lol

I am always like to read your post.Yor all post are really awesome.
Thanks for sharing dear.
Upvote and resteem done.

Hey @talanhorne
I think we both love feeding animals. Your seagull feeding just remembered me of my summertime when I used to feed fishes at our fish farm. I don't know what kind of satisfaction it gives but I always felt relaxed after feeding them. You won't believe I used to wake up at 5:00 AM and go to our farm for fish feeding.

  ·  7 years ago Reveal Comment

I agree with my assessment.I also hate little birds.
Thanks for sharing your thought and your writting.

Hi dear @talanhorne
How are you..
Dear i am new your blog and new..
Dear your nature photography is a wondarful ..and hehehehehe very very nice funny..so i just @resteem and #upvote.done...i really really love your post..
Thanks for sharing this post..

Good writing you just shared.Writing is very hard.
For your post propagation.
Upvote/Resteem
@talanhorne

This is great publishing and great writing experience.
@talanhorne
Resteem

I most like chickens. Owls have cruel sound and It's being scary at night. Yeah..Geece are monsters and looks like that. Pigeons already have weird looks. But better article creation @talanhorne.

Various kind of birds details wanna important who want to find wild lifers. Also to steemians. I prefer to read this article.

That is article is professional & Excellent writing . so great experience.
Thanks @talanhorne
100% like and resteem

Great post sir.
I believe in natural things in every category. 💚💚
You have a great knowledge in every field.
Excellent job.
Nice content sir.
I really appreciate your work. 🤗💙

Thanks @talanhorne sir for sharing this post.

Upvoted + resteemed your post.

Very inspiring and valuable post, I love chicken, duck and also bird too, success always for you brother @talanhorne

I really love your writting.Your writting is really awesome.
Thanks for sharing your writting.

Really? You don't loved birds? Why didn't you mention that earlier Polebird? We all love birds!

Can I tell you... the last couple of days our little forest farm has been full of musical birds just jumping around and having a great time? I didn't realise they had been sleeping for months, but it's so exciting to hear them out and about! I love it so much!

Gulls, um, less so.. but I'm glad you had fun bird-whisperer!

Excellent post.Your writting skill is really awesome.Keep it up dear.Always sharing your writting with us.
Thanks for sharing.
upvote and resteem 100% done.

Yes sir,ducks adorably awkward. They're non-agressive. And the way they shake their little tails is just too precious and Ducks are therapeutic

I love ducks so much.I dont hate or love birds but i like ducks.Your sharing ducks photo are really awesome.And your writting is really wonderful.I always like to read your post.
Thanks @talanhorne for sharing your post with us.
100% upvote and resteem done dear.

Very funny picture dear.I am really enjoy your post.
Lot of thanks @talanhorne for sharing.
keep it up.
upvoted & resteemed

Hello @talanhorne,

Extraordinary good assessment & I'm suggesting Penguins into this list as well.

~@mywhale

Wonderful writting @talanhorne about birds.
I read your previus post.Your writting is really awesome.
Thanks for sharing.
100like & resteem done.

Wow.......... one more wonderful post @talanhorne sir.
Really excellent writting.I really enjoy your post.
Thanks for sharing. sir @talanhorne

I love many chickens and always sit in front of the chicken and I drink coffee
Be in the early morning the most beautiful moments
A very special article was well done

Very beautiful. life funny post this post to you for thank you very much, and this post a lot like and like post vote and comments and post share, I like this post a total of all see and this post to everyone can vote

Really wonderful post.I really like to read your post because your writting is really awesome.
Thanks for sharing your writting dear.
100% upvote & resteem done.

You are a most tallented person because your writting.Your writting is really wonderful.
Thanks for sharing with us sir @talanhorne

  ·  7 years ago (edited)

I like all the birds. Pigeons certainly bring a lot of problems, in a city in a park on a bench it's not possible to sit crap, But when they fly in the sky in pairs, it's so beautiful

I agree with your thought and your writting dear @talanhorne.Your writting is really perfect and very excellent.Thanks for sharing your writting. Keep it up dear. And get free 100% upvote and resteem.

Seriously @talanhorne
I love birds so much.And your writting about birds is really awesome.
Thanks for sharing dear
100% upvote and resteem done

great post,interesting and brilliant writing,my dear friend @talanhorne,I also love chicken and its my favorite.
Cat gif really funny,thanks for share,
#upvote and #resteem,

  ·  7 years ago (edited)

the is so nature,very informative writing,my dear friend @talanhorne,cat gif really funny post,i really really love this post all time,thank you for sharing with us,

Wonderful article.And your sharing picture and gif are really amazing.
Thanks @talanhorne for sharing this.
100% like + resteem done.

excellent post ..loving to your blog.thanks for sharing..

upvote and resteem @talanhorne

impressive post yeah we all love the chicken.

  ·  7 years ago (edited)

I like what you said about Pigeons. It's a detail description about your feelings about them~


  ·  7 years ago (edited)

Another good story dear .you are very good writer that's why i regularly read you'r post.

Woow i love chicken so much.
Interesting and brilliant writting.
Some of funny design.
Wonderful sharing.
Carry on @talanhorne

Hi dear @talanhorne
How are you..
Dear i am new your blog and new..
Dear your natire photography is a wondarful ..and very very nice post..so i just @resteem and #upvote.done...i really really love your post..
Thanks for sharing this post..

Hi dear @talanhorne..
How are you?..
Dear You can not appreciate your pictures and the writing, the post you made, I love it too much, I'm very happy to see your post...and amazing funny..i really love this post..thanks for share dear @talanhorne..

wow
excellent birds..
i appreciate your blog..
thanks for sharing...

great post @ talanhorbe.black birds beautiful and so creepy. i really like your friend post

Amazing post @talanhorne
Your writting is wonderful.I am also hate birds but i love ducks.Your ducks picture is really awesome.And your sharing all picture and gif are really wonderful.
Thanks for sharing your writting.
upvoted & resteemed.

wow,,good blog and great writting sir,,
on content of bird,,by dint of my opinion,,i love chicken very much,
at the last ,,animition gif of cat just wow

the pigeon in the post is feeling angry
while chikens and ducks are loved by everyone
i also love parrots

We must reconcile ourselves with the fact that some birds bring problems. But this ecosystem is nature, and there will not be birds that will destroy us insects pests. That's who I hate most of all is insects :)

Excellent review @talanhorne and you rationally pointed to all the advantages and disadvantages of birds. You are right, for us chickens and ducks are more pleasant, since they are calm creatures and from them great benefit for people. Street pigeons, this is a real scourge of cities and you can say they are like a weed from which only one garbage!

really interesting post dear sir
i also hate some bird,,but chicken is my faviurite,,you really great said of this cintent

Hi dear @talanhorne
How are you..
Dear i am new your blog and new..
Dear post your animals photography is a amazing..and very nice post..so i just resteem and upvote..i really love your post..
Thanks for share...

you are a great photographer, thanks for sharing..

images (45).jpg

images (26).jpg

I was surprised you @talanhorne, because every post you always good.

Very useful information and thanks for sharing. @talanhorne

This is excellent work,cat with snake body is awesome,great work sir,loe your blog posts so much have a great day sir.

Amazing post friend,, I keep a lot of chickens and ducks friends and it's very fun

Amazing sir really loved it,this is awesome stuff sir,love your posts so much.have a great day sir.

You are a good person to write.your ideas and writing have been fulfilled.
(((((( Resteem service)))))

haha that's the kind of interesting post i was looking to read lol :D


impressive article & you made a nice discussion of what you hate. cat snake is a good thought though ;) @talanhorne

@resteemia
resteemed & upvoted

These are amazing collection sir,i love your blog posts so much,this is the reason why so many of them rates your blog so high,great work sir.

thanks for your great post @talanhorne

Everything related with nature are beautiful . But complexing with our deed , we are killing these beauty and the world become in stability.

You have a great talent of writing sir. Its really informative post. Thank you so much for sharing.

Hahaha. I find this post amusing, why do you hate pigeons this much. Pigeons are cute and every birds excretes so why only point out pigeons.
Just to be honest I don't hate any animal or bird , I don't understand why should I. I don't get a genione reason for that.

Nice writting.................

pigeons are beautiful birds and i love them as a pet.

Wow.......... one more wonderful post @talanhorne sir.
Really excellent writting.I really enjoy your post.
Thanks for sharing. sir @talanhorne

  ·  7 years ago (edited)

@talanhorne, all your posts are very good and riveting..

This is great explanation about how to explore certain blog posts.amazing work sir,keep going.

This is professional writing experience and great work.
Upvote Resteem

Nice words of birds and finally shared crazy animations. I love birds. IMG_20180307_172604_1.jpg

good writting...
go ahead.
best of luck...

Funny pic!!
nature-3141489_960_720.jpg

Thank you for sharing this information @talanhorne and very useful to us all.

its really great experiences share of lif,,everyboy love anything or hate,,
thats does not matter,

thanks @talanhorne,