Introducing myself

in neurodiversity •  5 months ago 

My name is Cassie and I am on the path to discovering my true identity.

See, I have always struggled with basic things. But I also developed strong masking abilities very early on. In my twenties, and early thirties, you could say I was a high-achiever. I was all about performance! But also, I didn't care to maintain relationships, and I structured my life around my personal interest and egoistic motivations.
But then it was time to have kids (conceptually, that seemed like something I wanted).
So I got the partner, had the kids, and my soul died. I don't think that is an exaggeration. Something died inside of me, and holding up a mask was no longer possible.
Between 33 and 39, I was stuck in a (shameful) burn-out. Which I now know is referred to as autistic burn-out. But it took me over six years to realize that this was happening because my brain is actually wired differently, and that there are others like me!
Getting here has been a difficult journey. Judging myself by the standards of a neurotypical society, I got stuck in a bad place. Thankfully, being extremely perseverant and privileged, I am now turning my shame into pride, one day at a time.
The world needs the neurodiverse community to stand up and disrupt status quo. I am here for it.

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