ARE YOU REALLY REAL???

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I was lying on a 4 inch thick bed and drifting away in thoughts, but due to shuffle play technology and the sound system of my mobile device, Kendrick Lamar's song titled "real" brought me back to reality. The content of the lyrics has a part where some lady kept emphasizing on her being real, Kendrick's fans can relate to it. Suddenly I was inspired.

Let's talk about being REAL. Probably everyone has an opinion on what being authentic is truly about, walk on the street and the first person you spot by the side of your cornea, step over and ask "excuse me, are you real?" you'll almost definitely get a resounding "YES, why do you ask?". Who are you to judge the response? You've probably never met the person before, you just have to take their word for it.
On a personal level, I must admit, it's an everyday struggle, am I real?... Sincerely, not really. Being on a continuous personal self improvement program helps to ameliorate on areas I am lacking, that just means being better than I was yesterday. This text is a self help guide, but I hope you also get enlightened. I wish to write on 3 areas I think we all might need to make some progress.

(1) Understand yourself: everyday from childhood, because of culture, expectations, religion, peers and family background we absorb a lot of things to our personality and in the process loose sight of who we truly are, in essence we live other peoples lives not ours. photocredit
Once we deviate from pursuing what truly makes us happy, we become less real. Ensure that your core reflects the personality you project everyday, this is only possible when you take the time to reflect and understand yourself on a very deep level, this may entail doing something alone, taking risk or going "crazy". Don't be afraid to reexamine your beliefs so you don't become institutionalized.

(2) Keep it real: A term I came across recently is "cognitive dissonance". It's a psychological term used to describe the stress or discomfort one feels when actions and thoughts and actions are polar. We've all been there. Discard and let go of old habits and beliefs that's are no more aligned with your person at the present stage of your life, you need real courage to do this as you've shielded your beliefs over time from change. Acknowledge that the world is constantly changing and so are you, therefore endeavor to learn new perspectives and not see life in binary (good/bad) as this will make you judgemental and not discover your true self. Read more and explore other things.

(3) Be real with others: don't allow the need to fit in or a desire for social acceptance with peers especially, cloud away your true self. photocredit Being real requires standing up for what you truly believe. Ensure the individuals you keep as friends build you up and not tear you down for being you.

Since this is supposed to be a self help. Nelson (that's my name : ) try to accept your realness with your imperfections, ditch long held understanding that are contrary to your present beliefs, don't be scared of what people will say. Continue to improve yourself. Travel and explore the world so you see things from varying perspectives. it wouldn't be easy for starters but you'll thrive. Cheers.