I Want The Smoke

The transition from 2019 to 2020 has been a time to reflect on where I am in my life. Receiving news that I had been successful in my application for promotion a few days prior to Christmas enhanced some truly brilliant, lovely family moments over the festive period.

My son, Edison is 22 months old and watching his progress and development has been a joy; I love him and my family so much.

With my son Edison at Heathlands Nature Reserve, December 2019.

There are many goals and projects forming and hope I will retain the energy to develop these. I know that at my best I have great determination but when I am tired or have fear I can lose my connection with what is real (only love is real) and lose focus. I hope this year to remember Marianne Williamson's quote from her book 'A Return To Love':

"Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness that most frightens us. We ask ourselves, 'Who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, fabulous?' Actually, who are you not to be? You are a child of God. Your playing small does not serve the world. There is nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other people won't feel insecure around you. We are all meant to shine, as children do. We were born to make manifest the glory of God that is within us. It's not just in some of us; it's in everyone. And as we let our own light shine, we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same. As we are liberated from our own fear, our presence automatically liberates others".

The title of this piece is is urban fighting talk as I want to be bold and conquer all adversities. Conversely I know that to achieve this I must surrender to the present moment. I must trust in myself and the magnificence of the universe.

May 2020 be the best year ever.