"Love Came Twice- the Finale" with epilogue by me. Otherwise, these are all Mama's words, as she wrote them (repost)

in non-fiction •  5 years ago 

Finale.jpg

Recap

 
At the end of Chapter Four, my sister Sylvia had borne her child, then while the family kept baby Debbie at home, she went back to school, enduring much ostracism and negativity, finished High School. After the graduation ceremony, she announced that she’d married a much older man months before, so she took Debbie and they all went with her new husband.
That left Mama’s youngest by her first marriage, John, Daddies son by his first marriage, Joe and my sister Linda,
[their child together], at home, living in the quarters over the service station in our home town.
We were still a close family, with those living nearby.
Mama’s eldest, Nancy lived in Savannah, she had a son who was now three years old, and a daughter soon to be born, 3 months after me


Soon after Sylvia was married Claude started selling chain saws and we had been selling them for about a year when the company had a convention for all the salesmen and dealers and their wives.
The convention was in Birmingham, Alabama. We went and had a wonderful time.

Not long after we came home I discovered I was pregnant, for which I was very disappointed.

Our only child, Linda was eight and a half years old. We did not want any more children and I hated it because of Claude drinking so much.
June the tenth we left for Tavares Florida to spend a few days. Claude had hurt his back and could not work at all. I had to do all the driving on the trip because he could not drive.
We took all the children with us. It took two cars to carry us all. We rented a large cabin and we had a wonderful time. We carried our cook with us and this made the vacation much more enjoyable. The boys and Sylvia learned to water ski, but they all got sunburned real bad. We took them to Silver Springs and they were all thrilled very much by all the things they saw.


Our baby was born August nineteen fifty-five. We named him Jerry.

Claude is a wonderful husband and father as long as he is not drinking, but as soon as he takes a few drinks he becomes a different man.
The children are afraid of him and the baby, who worships his Daddy just won’t let Claude touch him while he knows his Daddy is drinking.




I have prayed for God to open his heart before it is too late.


All the other children left home sooner than they would have if their Dad had not drank so much. I hope he will see his mistake in time to keep the three children we have left from doing the same.

I know Claude can’t work much longer because his back still gives him lots of trouble.

If God can see fit to show him the way, we still have a wonderful life ahead of us.

We have enough property and insurance to give us a good living without either of us having to work very much.



We have a nice place on the river not too far from Town. We spend all our spare time there now.
We have a three-room house there. One room is real large. It is our living room, dining room and kitchen. The other two rooms are bedrooms.

There is a big white beach and plenty of good swimming
.

I pray Claude can see before it is too late what he is doing to our future that should be the most wonderful time of our life.
We have eight wonderful grandchildren and before this year is over we will have ten.
We have ten children and I hope we will be able to enjoy our grandchildren as we did not have time to be with and enjoy our children.
My health had not been very good since my last baby was born, so in October I went to a female specialist for examination and he found I needed surgery right away. I had surgery on October the Fifth.
Now I feel so much better I can work all day and not get tired.
If Claude could just stop drinking now we could be very happy, Claude, the children and I.

Here ends what Mama wrote, which SHE entitled,

"Love Came Twice"


Epilogue

This is now me writing, filling in some holes, and continuing with our family story,

Triumphs and Tragedies

As you now know, my family was rather...prolific...On Daddies side, Claudelle ended up with six children, Sylvia had seven.
Robbie ended up with three children.
Robbie as a young man (2).jpg
Robbie had Measles at an early age, and the neurological damage resulted in him being nearly stone deaf. He was still extremely intelligent and became a highly paid Boiler Maker.
He also became a bad alcoholic. The scourge of my family.
Working, welding inside huge boilers for electric power plants, meant he was exposed to Asbestos, before anyone outside the Gov't and the Corporations knew of the dangers.
He died in 2003 from Mesothelioma.
~

Joe, Daddy's youngest was also intelligent but strong willed and rebellious. He and Daddy were always at odds over stupid stuff.

He was drafted in 1965, and less than a year later was severely burned in Vietnam, he died in Okinawa 10 days later.
They wouldn't let us open the coffin.
~

On Mama's side, her eldest Nancy, had four; three boys and one girl: Darlene, who was born 3 months after I was born.
Darlene died in 2002 from a rare form of very rapid onset Cancer.
~

Bobbie, Mama's second daughter, led quite a tragic life. She married and had to leave the Navy. She and Tom had one child, Gene.

That marriage didn't last long, and she embarked on a sordid journey which I won't go into, but I am pretty sure I heard that she'd had another child and gave him up for adoption.
For many years, we in the family watched her decline, she had what we called "Pin Strokes" and would experience days, sometimes weeks of delusional behavior. Later, she married a "Chief Petty Officer" not long before he was discharged; Schizophrenia. What a pair.
In something like 2008, her son Gene, who had tried to be a caregiver for her, got her a spot in the "Ga War Veterans Home" in Milledgeville Ga (sort of a nursing home special care). She had been diagnosed with "Lewy Body Dementia"
She died about 18 months after being admitted to that facility.
~

Mama's son Jim,(who has hardly been mentioned in this whole narrative) joined the Army in 1959, went to Korea, and came back a changed man.

Opinionated, hard to get along with, he steadily retreated from the family.
Last year I went to see him for the first time in over 30 yrs. He lives about 150 mi from here. Never married, no children.
~

John, Mama's youngest with Mr Loren, also left us early to join the Air Force.

He married a woman from Massachusetts, had four wonderful children. (He too, struggled with Alcohol for years) He and his wife still live up North.

Claude and Margaret


Pictured here at their 25th anniversary party at our house in 1971.
By now, Daddy was well and truly about to retire (despite what Mama said in her story, he never STOPPED working for long).
He had finally begun to put down the bottle too.
He and Mama had taken up GOLF for god's sake!

~The Wreck~

Three years later, in April of 1974, as we were leaving Church on Sunday Morning, the three of us, me Mama and Daddy, with me driving and all in the front seat of a GMC Sprint, had a wreck. I had pulled out in front of an oncoming car. We were 'Tee-Boned', with the impact hitting us squarely at Daddy's door.
He was severely injured, all of his ribs were broken, lungs pierced, pelvic girdle broken.
Mama had three ribs and her pelvic girdle broken from the force of Daddy being slammed into her.
The two of them and the impact of the seat being shoved sideways, popped open my door, I fell out and scraped my elbow.
Daddy was taken to Savannah, where he lived in ICU for 3 wks, 3 days. Being on a ventilator, he couldn't speak, though he desperately tried, oh how he tried.
They gave him paper and pen, paper and markers, but what he wrote out was gibberish.
He died without ever being able to tell me whatever it was he wanted to say.
At this point, at 18, Daddy and I were always butting heads. I was a Hippie, and he had no clue what to make of me.

Since I had already begun drinking (at age 14), smoking pot (16) experimenting with hallucinogens, when the accident happened (I was NOT HIGH), I couldn't help but wonder if due to some quirk in my brain, I had not seen the oncoming car, with the bizarre thought that with Daddy gone/out of the way, my conflicts with him would be ended, and I would then inherit the house, business and properties. (Obviously, the thought had crossed my mind)
For MANY MANY years I sought absolution in the bottom of the bottle, associating with the DREGS of life, using just about every drug there is and ended up squandering everything I had inherited, the house, the money...all my bridges burned in my small hometown.
It would be another 35 yrs before I too, put away the drugs and alcohol, and have made peace with my part in Daddy's death.
~

Mama died in 2002 after (mercifully) a very short bought with a rapid onset form of cancer.
~

Linda? She married and had two children, one of whom is a pride and joy, a musician(singer) of great talent (I taught her everything she knows... not, but my music did wear off on all my family). Her brother, is a different matter. Problem child from the start, still to this day at 50 something, cannot hold a job, and is on full SS disability.

"Love Came Twice"

The finale
by
Jerry E Smith
©1/27/2020

This is a repost, all images are family history


These .gifs were created for me by @coquiunlimited; many thanks




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What a fascinating story of love, life, addiction and death. This life is so challenging. I love all the photos and stories.

Thank you Janelle, you didn't mention dysfunctional family dynamics, but really
For the most part, we were a family, and we did have closeness and love.
I appreciate the comment and support @wandrndrose7

What a great trip back memory lane!

This post has been appreciated and featured in daily quality content rewards. Keep up the good work.

Thank you @appreciator, I hope you read the earlier installments to get the whole picture.
I've considered consolidated into one, long post, but in my experience long posts lose the readers attention.
I am grateful for any and all support @appreciator.

Hi @jerrytsuseer
Find the entry to your post in the @preciator post
I don't usually read stories, but I think that hooked first by the photos and then as I read I was reflected in much of what your mother wrote.
I love your hope and strength.
Keep some nostalgia and desire to know more, so probably read the previous chapters.
Happy life!

Thank you @mariita52, I will look, but did you leave of a letter?
@apreciator commented before you, is there a difference between
@preciator and @apreciator?
Whichever, I'll look and I am as always grateful for the comments and
Support, and please do read from the beginning.