Glad you laughed. As for the not having kids bit, I would think no less of you if you were to position a teddy bear, or a pumpkin wearing a jumper, on your lap and read to them. Studies have shown that one of the times when our brains show the most amount of activity and smartypantsness is when we read out loud. The same goes for doing simple mathematics in your head, but I really hate math so I'll stick with the reading. True statement!