Parenting Hack #1: The Birthday Present Policy

The last child has just left; the birthday party is over. You fall into the chair behind you exhausted from a near all-nighter trying to pull everything together for a semi-pinterest worthy party. Just as your body begins to relax you hear a sorrowful wail from downstairs “Noooooooo…..Mom, m-m-my t-t-toy is bro-k-ken!”. The heartbroken birthday child comes up the stairs sobbing, followed by a guilty faced and equally sad sibling. What an end to a birthday. Want to avoid this parenting horror…read on.

Frustrated parents, I present to you “The Birthday Present Policy”. This hack is simple and specific. In our family we value sharing and generosity, but we also value respecting others, which includes respecting their property. Therefore, on the birthday girl/boy’s special day, no one else in the family is permitted to play with any of their gifts. We give them that day, and possibly a day or two after to be a bit possessive with their new possessions. After a couple of days (with a few exceptions) they are expected to include other siblings in their play when its age-appropriate and the new gift joins the ranks of any other possession in the home, important but not that important.

When the child is given a few days to enjoy their toy on their own terms and the shine has worn off a little, they are often excited to share it with their siblings and excited for them to try it out.

The same goes for going to friends’ birthday parties. We do not presume to be given a turn to try any of the birthday child’s new toys. We find joy in watching them enjoy their new gifts. The bottom line in our house is: "People Are More Important Than Possessions". But, I do find this parenting hack to be appreciated by all the kids in our family, it has saved us some tears and probably a few broken toys.