The Importance of Being Assertive

Being assertive is a sign of strong, healthy boundaries.
When you assert yourself, you are defining your boundaries.

Assertiveness is not aggressiveness.
Assertiveness is defining your boundaries while staying within them, while aggressiveness is crossing over into another's boundaries when trying to assert yourself.

Being assertive involves the use of “I” statements which is one of the methods of conflict resolution.
The use of “I” statements is a way to state your wants and needs from the perspective of owning your feelings as opposed to using “you” statements which can come across as aggressive and blaming.
The latter usually just leads to defensiveness and a lack of peaceful resolution.

Assertiveness can be quite difficult for people who are uncomfortable with conflict as it usually involves some amount of tension and not giving in to what the other person wants.
Using conflict resolution methods can help guide you through this process.

A lack of assertiveness and healthy boundaries can lead to a victim mentality and a feeling of often getting stepped on in life. We're fond of the phrase victims are violent, and would warn against victim mentality while trying to come to peaceful resolution.

You must be able to state your needs and be able to say NO when necessary.

Avoiding situations or people because you are avoiding conflict and assertiveness can leave you with a feeling of unsettled stress that will remain until the situation is resolved.