Mothering put out a story that's near and dear to my heart... the safety of your butt (w)holes during child birth. I say this with some snippiness, but when our first one was born the doc came in with these giant scissors like her asshole was a ribbon a mayor needed to cut. The only thing that stopped them from tearing my wife a new one was the fact that we went with midwives who were some of the most bad ass ladies we coulda asked for! They told the doc to leave her alone and despite some complications during the pregnancy it all worked out.
Anyway, here's a story about not pushing during labor. Apparently that lead to a seven fold decrease in rectal tearing. I guess the advice of shove that baby through your body as fast as fucking possible isn't actually the best advice to give.
http://www.mothering.com/articles/women-in-labor-stop-pushing-see-amazing-results/
So, read the article and maybe think of me the first time you poop after childbirth and it doesn't feel like razor blades up in there.