We all have had to raise our voice at some point in our lives (if not during the day), for some of us, it has actually become part of our lives, a pattern of some sort. Yelling can be a form of self-defence mechanism or a form of expression which isn't always pleasant to the "yeller" and the "yellee".

I could recall so many times when someone's message of love and care was lost (or misunderstood) in the big ocean of yelling. We sometimes find ourselves yelling without really wanting to.

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It's okay to defend yourself, it is okay to express yourself, it is okay to seek to be understood. But yelling actually does less of that, in fact, it put strain to a relationship and often times destroys it because there wouldn't be understanding.

I don't like being yelled at, I believe you don't like being yelled at either, so also is the person that you yelled at. If we all don't like it, then why do we always find ourselves doing that? We also don't feel great while we yell (maybe because we know the person listening hardly is paying attention), but we always find ourselves doing it.

We can't say we wanna stop yelling altogether (because that will be near impossible), being conscious and aware while you start yelling will go a long way in helping you reduce the rate at which you yell. There is alot more fulfilment when you are able to calm down (which isn't one of the easiest things to do) and relay your feeling to the listener, you will feel better and will reach an understanding with the listener.

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Most time when angry, we tend to yell, so it will be great if could pause with the "talk" when angry,  walk away from the situation for a little while if you need to, take a deep breath (it sure does help) and let your anger melt away. Then, you can talk calmly.

I know it is not easy. Yes, they stepped on your nerves, yes, you need to defend yourself, but you will hardly achieve what you want to with your talks when you yell. Afterall, no one ever does something  because he was yelled at (at least not me). So let yourself free from the clutches of yelling!