You would think it would be a simple enough question to answer, given all the advice about learning self-control, being patient and not expecting too much. Yet, how to become truly assertive can be a bit more complicated than it sounds. If you are looking for tips and tricks on how to become more assertive, you will soon realise that you have a number of different options. The good news is that some of these different options are actually very similar. In this article I will explain how some of these options can be applied to your own situations so you can understand how they might help with your own problem.
Learning how to become truly assertive means addressing the issues that are leading to your own problem in the first place. Many people will try and find a solution to their assertiveness problems by trying to resolve them from within. This is rarely, if ever, a good idea. Trying to control the other person or situation rather than working to resolve the issues that are causing the problem is usually a recipe for failure.
When it comes to dealing with an issue that is causing you to be assertive, dealing with the issue must be done before it gets out of control. It may seem obvious, but when you try to solve a problem before it has taken root it usually goes unrewarded. You have to stop the problem from becoming habitual. Once you do this, you are well placed to use assertiveness to change the situation rather than trying to control it.
There are many different assertiveness techniques you can use. Some of these involve simply maintaining a sense of control, which is useful if you are caught in a particular situation where you are already feeling aggressive. If you remain in control, this allows you to remain calm and more in control of your emotions. The whole idea is to make yourself feel calm and relaxed. Once you know how to become truly assertive, it really is easy and you will soon find that you are enjoying it on a regular basis.
How to become truly assertive also means learning how to be assertive with others. A good way to achieve this is through communication. When you communicate with others, it is important to make sure you remain clear and precise about what you want. When you communicate, don't hesitate to challenge them or even argue with them. You never know when you might need to use these tools if there are problems at stake. You never know, it could be the key to solving the problem.
One last tip on how to become truly assertive ways is to always think before you speak. Even if you think you are being assertive in a mild manner, when you voice out your opinion, make sure that you are clear and concise about it. If you are unclear, the person talking to will become uncertain too. It's always better to have a direct and clear point of view than a lot of words.