Phobias Suck

Soooooooo I'm phobic about bugs. I used to be worse than I am now, which you wouldn't believe if you saw my performance last night. Last night, I had my worst meltdown in years. And I do mean a total and complete screaming, sobbing, panicking meltdown. Why? Because this guy was in my apartment:

That's my I-don't-even-want-to-look-at-photos-right-now way of saying: there was a scorpion in my apartment.

Now, the night before the biggest fucking beetle was in my apartment, which freaks me out too, but I dealt with it remarkably well for me. I screamed when I first saw it, it scurried behind my toaster oven, and I have not hunted it to the ends of the Earth (which is what would have happened before). I just left it there. I'm still avoiding that area a bit, even though it might be long gone from that corner of the kitchen now, but otherwise I'm living my life. In the past, I would not have been able to sleep with that in the apartment.

Then a damn scorpion showed up.

At first I saw what I presume was it (please let it have been it and not any MORE giant ass bugs) - walking into the bedroom. But it looked bigger. I thought it was the beetle with wings up (maybe it was really, I'm not sure at this point, I saw a giant bug in the shadows). I screamed bloody murder and shut the bedroom door and stuffed a carpet under it.

Then I saw the scorpion properly scooting down the hallway in the opposite direction - so either it escaped the rug or that first sighting was the beetle. I freaked out. FREAKED OUT.

I cannot adequately describe to you how hard I freaked out. There was screaming and crying and gnashing of teeth.

It was two in the morning, and it's just me and the cats - no one to deal with it for me.

I have been in a depressive low for so long, and it was like I broke the damn of emotions that I had been too exhausted to really feel. Suddenly EVERYTHING came flying out of me, and I was crying about the scorpion, and my health and life in general. I mean it when I say it triggered a total meltdown.

Then it crawled back - and WENT IN THE BATHROOM.

I was like, well, I can never poop or shower again... time to move out.

I shut the bathroom door and moved the carpet to that door.

And then it escaped THAT setup and started crawling back toward the bedroom - Maggie pointed it out to me. Maggie is the Goddess of the Hunt around here.

I am badass

I screamed again, and it froze (thankfully). I had the vacuum ready to go, and I vacuumed it up. And then I vacuumed up cat litter to hopefully bury it in the vacuum and kill it (I always do that when I vacuum a big scary bug). I left the vacuum in the bedroom for a hot minute - because what if there WAS more than one or the beetle showed its face - but then I thought no, there is a scorpion in the vacuum - and I put it outside on the stoop (which is also what I usually do when I vacuum a big scary bug, but haven't had to do in some time because I've been getting better about the phobia).

I successfully used the toilet when I woke up this afternoon (because I didn't sleep until sometime after sunrise). I totally inspected the bathroom first, but - hey, that's a win considering I wanted to wall off that room with bricks and mortar just a few hours earlier.

And if you're wondering - the thing walked RIGHT NEXT TO Yuan - like, it practically touched his fur - and he just kept eating, giving no fucks. He hunts birds (he once snatched one out of midair on the balcony - yes, I got him to let it go and it flew off). Maggie hunts bugs.

So now I want to scour my whole apartment, but I don't have the energy and I'm too afraid at the same time.

And that is the story of why I should get Actifit points for reaching my target heart rate for hours in the middle of the night except it was panic and not exercise, lol.

I hope y'all had a more restful night than I did - stay strong, Steemit!